Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Kids no longer taught to clean their plates?

301 replies

user1489670695 · 16/03/2017 13:50

It's March break, and I've had a couple of my kids' friends over on and off for meals. (ages 11 and 14)

I've noticed they all seem to serve themselves larger portions than they can actually eat (none of that "plating" nonsense in my house!!), so there's a lot of waste food on their plates. I'd noticed that before too, whenever we had kid guests. Lots of uneaten food on their plates. It doubly annoys me as money is tight, I'm a single mom, shopping for and carrying groceries is hard work, etc etc.

There's not much I guess I can do about it (I compost, so that's a bit better than just trashing it)- but just wanted to rant, and ask if you teach your kids to not waste food?

I was raised up to be very conscientious about wasting food and I always nag at my own kids about serving themselves as much as they can eat and eating it all up. I would have thought, in this day and age, with all the stuff about environment and waste and so on, kids would have been taught to be even more careful with wasting food. But apparently not.

OP posts:
OopsDearyMe · 16/03/2017 22:16

Surely NOT plating up is more wasteful as you will have to make more to ensure for possible seconds which thence might not be had, more leftovers that way. Not hsgure why you are so against the idea.

Oh and I'm another who was always made to stay at the table until plate was clean and now have no idea when I am full. It IS part of the reason we are so obese now, along with a range of other reasons. My brother and sister are also obese adults !

letsmargaritatime · 16/03/2017 22:26

the obesity crisis comes more from the cheap availability of processed, high sugar food than been taught to serve yourself and eat accordingly!

With you on this point. But I still encourage my dc to listen to tummy and not to continue to eat if full, reminding them they can have it later if they are hungry then. I do hate waste though and there are no top ups or snacks if food is left on their plates.

NennyNooNoo · 16/03/2017 22:46

As a OP said, your title was misleading. This isn't about kids clearing their plates, this is about eyes too big for their tummies and lacking any sense of portion control. I've noticed this at kids parties / buffets too - people piling their plates with food that they don't eat. I think everyone is giving the OP a hard time about this. I can see why it's annoying. But most children / young teenagers are probably used to having the food dished out for them so they really have no idea how much to take.

Oswin · 16/03/2017 22:48

You keep saying you do don't force them to clear the plate but that is exactly what you are doing!

NennyNooNoo · 16/03/2017 22:54

P.s whole generations before us were brought up to clear their plates and they weren't obese. But they didn't have easy availability of processed junk food and confectionary.

mummabearfoyrbabybears · 16/03/2017 22:55

Yes I do ask and encourage my children to clear their plates. I know my children and their activity levels and appetite. I also know what portion size means. It's actually far, far smaller than people imagine. Wasting food starts with cooking and preparing too much. You did that OP as there was extra food for the children to take. Then you did not portion control it. Serving large portions to children adds to the obesity crisis and then health professionals tell us not to make children clear their plates because it's a lost cause telling the parents to stop piling it up! There will always be days when the children aren't as hungry or dislike something but portion size is the absolute key!

DioneTheDiabolist · 16/03/2017 22:57

OP, I can see that this is really bothering you.Thanks Perhaps you could speak to the parents and suggest they take their DC to "All You Can Eat" buffet places, in order to teach them about portion control before they come to yours for dinner again?

Astoria7974 · 16/03/2017 23:00

Kids were encouraged to clean their plates in the days when they weren't encouraged to gorge on snacks & probably had a lot of exercise. Things are different now

Porpoiselife · 16/03/2017 23:23

Op I completely understand where you're coming from. You are not insisting these children clear their plates but to not put masses of food they have no intention of eating on them. At 11 and 14 they should have an idea of how hungry they are! But if their parents always plate it up for them and not care about waste that's the issue.

these same children were probably the ones we see at toddler parties whose parents pile their party plate up with masses of stuff that they will never eat in a million years! It's probably normal for them to do that and never be told it's wasteful throughout their childhood.

crapfatbanana · 16/03/2017 23:38

OP, I agree that it's annoying when the food you served gets wasted. I sort of agree that the children should have known to take smaller portions, but have you never loaded a plate, believing yourself to be ravenously hungry, only to realise partway through eating that it's outfaced you?

My eyes are sometimes bigger than my belly and I'm 39.

PenelopeFlintstone · 16/03/2017 23:46

NennyNooNoo P.s whole generations before us were brought up to clear their plates and they weren't obese.
I was thinking this too.

mewkins · 16/03/2017 23:47

Maybe your cooking looks better than ot tastes Wink

PlayOnWurtz · 16/03/2017 23:50

We do "eat till you're full but if you take it you eat it" in our house.

Fozzleyplum · 16/03/2017 23:58

The rule in our house has always been that if the DC'S (now in their teens) are given more food than they can eat, they are free to leave some. However, if they have taken the food themselves, they are expected to eat it all. They would have us to answer to if they took more than they could eat, as we think it's bad manners and wasteful.

I do (silently) hoik my judgy pants at anyone who loads their own plate, then leaves food.

BarbarianMum · 17/03/2017 08:19

whole generations before us were brought up to clear their plates and they weren't obese.

I was thinking about this last night. In our house, the kids are served moderate portions and encouraged to clear their plate. I find if I don't do this and they leave half, then they end up eating more as next they want pudding (fruit/yogurt) then half an hour later they are 'hungry' again and wanting biscuits. I certainly won't make them finish it, but if they don't that's the end of the meal and they can wait for the next one.

I think encouraging them to eat well at mealtimes and discouraging snacking in between is healthier than letting them eat until not momentarily hungry then giving more food an hour or two later.

BastardGoDarkly · 17/03/2017 08:39

My Mam also made me sit at the table until my meal was finished, I used to beg my brother to eat some, feed it to the dog given half a chance, cry, I fell asleep often at the table, it was honestly the plague of my childhood.

Sorry op, I know that's not even what your talking about!

I'd also plate and offer seconds, then freeze whatever's left Smile

yorkshirepuddingandroastbeef · 17/03/2017 09:03

Perhaps they are not used to serving themselves and take more than they need. It's not hard to do. As children, we were given plates of food served up by my Mum.

Not really sure what this thread is trying to achieve really. If they are taking too much and you're not happy then stick smaller portions on plates. If they eat it and want more then they can have seconds.

You're sweating the small stuff a bit. Confused

Noodoodle · 17/03/2017 10:33

If money is tight, how on earth can you afford to cook random amounts of food not knowing who will eat what or how much? Try cooking portions, it's easier, cheaper, less food wastage...the only thing I've ever not put on plates is a roast dinner as we've always loved the buffet feel of putting your own roast dinner together!

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 17/03/2017 11:09

@Fozzleyplum - would you really rather your children ate more food than they want and need, because they have made a mistake and taken too much food? That is not healthy eating.

WankingMonkey · 17/03/2017 11:41

2) get a Labrador (no waste in this house)

Excellent advice Grin

Our lab when I was growing up..I swear she worked better than the hoover

FeliciaJollygoodfellow · 17/03/2017 11:45

whole generations before us were brought up to clear their plates and they weren't obese.

That's true, but fast food wasn't as endemic, portions were smaller, meals were more 'meat and two veg' than piles of pasta, pizzas etc. Fish and chips was a once a week (if that) meal whereas now kids go to McDonald's for lunch and then come home for a full on dinner.

kmc1111 · 17/03/2017 11:59

Why are you presenting them with so much food then? If you're cooking far too much for one sitting in order to have leftovers, put those portions in containers before letting the kids get theirs. Problem solved.

If you're just over-catering regularly and not actually trying to batch cook, then you have the exact same problem as the kids, you can't judge the amount of food needed. If you can't do it when you're actually making a meal, why do you think kids will be any better at it?

Fozzleyplum · 17/03/2017 12:29

SDTG - The problem never arises, because they were taught at a very early age (about 4 - as soon as they were old enough to be allowed to help themselves) not to do it, so they don't. And they're both slim and always have been.

expatinscotland · 17/03/2017 12:37

'whole generations before us were brought up to clear their plates and they weren't obese.'

Ah, the good ol' days! Guess what? It's in the past! It'll never be 1975 again! Get over it and plate up their food, OP. Duh.

BoredOnMatLeave · 17/03/2017 12:41

Another one here that was made to eat everything on their plate and ended up with a weight problem.

However since you are not 'plating' YANBU.

It's not a child thing though, I've seen plenty of adults at buffets/carvery's that load the plate up and don't eat it all... it is annoying and terribly wasteful.

Swipe left for the next trending thread