Kids no longer taught to clean their plates?

[user1489670695]

It's March break, and I've had a couple of my kids' friends over on and off for meals. (ages 11 and 14)

I've noticed they all seem to serve themselves larger portions than they can actually eat (none of that "plating" nonsense in my house!!), so there's a lot of waste food on their plates. I'd noticed that before too, whenever we had kid guests. Lots of uneaten food on their plates. It doubly annoys me as money is tight, I'm a single mom, shopping for and carrying groceries is hard work, etc etc.

There's not much I guess I can do about it (I compost, so that's a bit better than just trashing it)- but just wanted to rant, and ask if you teach your kids to not waste food?

I was raised up to be very conscientious about wasting food and I always nag at my own kids about serving themselves as much as they can eat and eating it all up. I would have thought, in this day and age, with all the stuff about environment and waste and so on, kids would have been taught to be even more careful with wasting food. But apparently not.

@user1489670695 (I think I've done that properly)

I don't mean physically forced. I meant 'made to'- my mum used to tell me about when she was a little girl and she wasn't allowed to leave the table until she had cleared her plate and she would sit there gagging and crying over now cold food. She wasn't physically forced but as the condition was that she wasn't allowed to leave the table unless she did, she certainly felt forced

Give them a smaller plate so they can't take too much. I was always made to clear my plate and as a child and I ended up with a severe weight problem. It took me many years to get down to a decent weight and I still have trouble knowing when to stop eating.

How would plating reduce waste? Surely the whole point of letting them serve themselves is to let them serve as much as they can eat?

Because their eyes are bigger than their bellies.

My kids are generally expected to clear their plate unless they are clearly properly full, and by that I mean they can't manage a biscuit. Nearly all their friends who visit leave a load of food on their plate to be thrown away and then expect to eat pudding.

I don't force my children to eat. I give sensible sized portions which I know they can manage, give the option of seconds, and offer pudding if they have finished their main course. We hardly throw any food away in this house and I think teaching kids it's okay to throw away half a plate of food is terrible.

Wasting lots of food? Cook less. Fruit after dinner or supper later.

Yep, rice, that's what used to happen to me. I was about 14 at a friend's house trying to force food down when her dad first introduced me to the concept that it was OK to leave food on your plate if you were full.

Mine serve themselves with an amount that they are happy with, they can decide for themselves when they are full. All three have good, healthy figures. I was never allowed to leave the table until I had eaten everything on my plate including seconds which were always given so the food wasn't wasted as my parents had an obsession with food never been wasted; every last crumb had to be eaten.

no - forcing kids to clear plates creates guilt ridden obese adults

Born in the 50s I always clean my plate. My mother knew what size portion to serve (quite small, then seconds if I wished). Nothing wasted as money was tight. Used the same small portion strategy with my 80s, 90s born children. I suggest that plating would help avoid waste.

I don't get what you're not getting. Several people have explained it really clearly. You plate it up. If they want seconds, give a small amount. If they still leave waste, give them less next time. Perhaps it's no wonder they're getting it wrong when you're struggling with it too. Surely you can see your strategy of letting them serve themselves isn't working cos of the simple eyes/belly contrast pointed out by PP. Plating smaller portions is the way to go. And maybe not even having seconds. cant they have an apple if they're still hungry?

Cook less

What happens to the food left on the serving dishes?

Is that somehow saved from the bin?

There are 2 separate issues here. 1) Should children be taught to always clear their plate- definitely not, learning to eat whether you are hungry or not is why I am fat. Putting food in their mouths when they are not hungry is as wasteful as putting it in the bin. 2) Should children learn how to serve themselves sensible portions- obviously yes. However, at that age (especially if their parents serve the food for them at home) it is difficult to know how much is enough- this is a skill they need to learn through trial and error.

I agree it's irritating when visitors put food on their plate (that you would otherwise have been able to save and eat another day) and hardly eat any of it. But maybe for other people's children the answer is to serve them a small portion and let them know they can ask for more if the eat all of that and are still hungry. With your own children it's easier to teach them this skill by example/discussing it etc.

I feel your pain though- I recently spent ages making a selection of nice home-made nibbles etc for my DC to share with friends whilst watching a film as a treat for good behaviour. One child piled his plate with 3 or 4 of each, poked them all with his fingers and and then announced he didn't like any of it and could he have crisps instead.

The OP is not talking about forcing children to clear their plates.

She is saying that children aged 11 and 14 should know to take smaller portions and then go back got seconds if necessary. They shouldn't be loading up plates and then scraping half of it.

I agree with you, OP.

Thinking about it - the reason kids don't know when to stop is because they are generally growing - some days weeks they will eats twice the 'normal' intake - other time pick

So it's difficult to judge!

There also a difference between something they really enjoy and stuff they'd eat -

Food eaten by people who are full or just don't want it is no less wasted than if it goes in the bin.

However, this needs to combine with serving a sensible portion in the first place. So if there is spare food, people can eat if it they want it, or it can be saved for later.

Astro55 - Presumably if it hasn't been on somebody's plate it can be saved for another time. It's a bit gross to eat food from someone's plate the next day.

OP, if the problem is they are putting too much food on their plate, then you could just serve them a little bit and they can help themselves to more if they want it.

Wolfiefan that's what I do with my dcs it works and we rarely have wasted food.

Surely you can see your strategy of letting them serve themselves isn't working cos of the simple eyes/belly contrast pointed out by PP.

Youngest child is 11. Not 3. Their parents should have taught them by now to not take a big plateful unless they're sure they want it.

I only get annoyed if someone asked for something that they then had no intention of eating.

My DC's waste food in that I put a sensible average portion on their plate. Sometimes it's enough, sometimes they need more, sometimes they eat much less. It's not easy to anticipate, and they're young enough to make it difficult for them to gauge their needs. Last night the 6 year old was struggling with tiredness/ hay fever and barely picked at his favourite meal.

What annoys me more is if DH has devoured a substantial meal and raids what I'd planned to leave aside for my next lunch.

Food can be just as wasted on the waist as it is in the bin.

Err, they're children.
Sorry but an 11 year old cannot necessarily judge the difference between how hungry they are feeling to knowing exactly how much food on their plate will satiate them.

You're being unreasonable to think they could know how much is not too much. Even an adult cannot do that as spot on as you're implying they should.
Are you in the UK?

If though, you had let them serve themselves and said "don't put put too much on your plate to start with, you can always have seconds" perhaps they would have taken less?

Also, if they've taken too much then wasted it, you have obvious overcooked, otherwise, there would be none left over

just plate them up a small portion, and if they finish offer them some more. Don't see the problem.

Teaching kids not to waste food is not the same as teaching them to clear their plates. Surely eating something you don't want or need is also "wasting" food?

I hated being made to clear my plate as a child and would never inflict that on anyone else

I plate up the food then put serving dishes on the table for second helpings once first lot has been eaten. Any leftovers are soon used up!

I plate the food up into portions I know my children can manage and if they want more they can have more. I never force them to eat all of what's on their plate and I wasn't told to as a child either. My nephew is told to eat everything and his mother physically spoons it into his mouth all while he is panting and sweating. Makes me shudder.