Kids no longer taught to clean their plates?

[user1489670695]

It's March break, and I've had a couple of my kids' friends over on and off for meals. (ages 11 and 14)

I've noticed they all seem to serve themselves larger portions than they can actually eat (none of that "plating" nonsense in my house!!), so there's a lot of waste food on their plates. I'd noticed that before too, whenever we had kid guests. Lots of uneaten food on their plates. It doubly annoys me as money is tight, I'm a single mom, shopping for and carrying groceries is hard work, etc etc.

There's not much I guess I can do about it (I compost, so that's a bit better than just trashing it)- but just wanted to rant, and ask if you teach your kids to not waste food?

I was raised up to be very conscientious about wasting food and I always nag at my own kids about serving themselves as much as they can eat and eating it all up. I would have thought, in this day and age, with all the stuff about environment and waste and so on, kids would have been taught to be even more careful with wasting food. But apparently not.

There's a lot of 'shoulds' on here. Fine, if you want to get worked up about what kids should know, what parents should have taught them. But the reality that you - and society - has to deal with is that while they should, many don't. Food for many is a complicated thing and while you may have self-control, lots of adults struggle with portion-size, never mind 11 year olds.

I was forced to clear my plate as a child and I became an obese adult.

I allow my chicks to stop eating when he's full as I don't want this to happen to him.

Child not chicks!

It's wasted food because once it's been picked over on someone's plate, nobody else wants it.

Food that hasn't been served up can be refrigerated and eaten as leftovers.

None of that plating nonsense in my house!!

Eh, putting food on someone's plate is nonsense???! That's one of the maddest things I've read on this site (and that's saying a lot!)

How about you give your children about the amount that they can eat? You're the parent, you give them their dinner. Why is this nonsense?

I think it takes kids quite a long time to learn how much to serve themselves. My kids, at 8, go from "really, really hungry" to "too full to eat except for pudding ") in the space of a couple of mouthfuls. I agree it's something they need to learn, but I think it takes a lot of time and reminders. I would phrase it as learning to "only take what they need" not "clean their plates" though. As cleaning their plates sounds like the emphasis is on them eating regardless of whoever they need it (which can be more wasteful than leaving it on their plates if it encourages obesity).

I don't get the angst. If "money is tight, I'm a single mom, shopping for and carrying groceries is hard work, etc etc " and you disapprove of large portions, why are you cooking food in excess.

Decide how much is a decent portion, multiply it by the number of people and Bob's your uncle. Don't make too much food and then complain that people don't eat it.

*Weather they need it. Not whoever they need it!

*and whether, not weather!

Agree with pp that you are overcatering. or your cooking isn't as good as you think it is

Agree with you OP.

DD2 has a friend who sometimes stays over and would pour loads of milk into cereal and then leave it. The bowl would be brim full of wasted milk. I've seen him do it at home too and am amazed that neither parent says anything. They just pour the milk down the sink.

Another child would bite into a piece of fruit, decide they didn't want it and then come asking for another piece of fruit a short time later only to do the same.

Not helping yourself to food you have no intention of eating is a different issue to being made to finish every mouthful.

Its not advised to teach kids to clear their plates, its healthier to teach them to stop when they feel full - otherwise they lose that sensation.

Use smaller plates & offer seconds

Them eating food they don't want is no less of a waste than composting food they didn't eat.

The only way to reduce that waste would actually be for you to buy and cook less in the first place.

Ecclesiastes

senua, maybe so she can use the leftovers for another meal? Cooking extra is not cooking to excess, ffs, it's a smart use of time and money.

No because I'm not a twat

YABU I was never taught to clean my plate. As pp have said, it is teaching children to eat when they are not hungry, which is a bad idea.

My mother always said 'eat what you want and leave the rest'. That's because she had a lot of food issues herself and did not want us to end up like her. She grew up in the 1930s, so her obesity had nothing to do with the cheap availability of processed, high sugar food we have today.

I get it that you think your dc's friends are old enough to know how to judge portion size, but even if they are old enough they clearly don't know how. That's the reality you are dealing with.

Your food is played in restaurants, why not at home? It's normal to me to plate food, unless it's Xmas dinner or Sunday lunch or you're having a tapas type lunch, for both adults and children. I think a lot of people, adults and kids, are guilty of 'eyes bigger then bellies', unless they are watching their weight. Just plate a normal portion and problem solved!

You plate up smaller portion and they can have more if they finish and are still hungry... that's how it saves in waste. Not rocket science.

This is what I do too. If I put too much on DS2's plate it just overfaces him and he eats very little before complaining he's full (picky eater). If left to serve himself, DS1 would end up with one of those towering plates of food you see people with at Toby Carvery, trying to get their money's worth. So I make plenty, plate it up and then any leftovers can go in the fridge, not the bin.

@user1489670695 - I am not sure why you assume that the children would ask for seconds and then not eat them. You might well find that they eat what they are given first off, and then don't want seconds - and you would waste less.

Alternatively, you could take a bit more control at the point where they are serving themselves, and suggest that, as they always leave lots of food, this time they take a smaller portion and come back if they want more.

Perhaps they aren't used to serving themselves, and so take more than they can eat.

But if they do end up with too much food on their plate, whoever dishes it up, it is better that they stop eating when they have had enough than that they feel they MUST finish the food, even if they don't want it.

I was brought up to clear my plate, and I still struggle with the guilt if I don't eat all I am given - even though I know I am obese, and need to eat less. I do try to ensure I only take what I am going to eat, if I am serving myself - but if someone else is serving me, and gives me too big a portion, I feel really guilty if I don't clear my plate - and that is a bad thing, I assure you.

Surely the point is that children should be taught basic manners of taking a reasonable portion and having seconds if they are still hungry?

Cooking extra is not cooking to excess, ffs, it's a smart use of time and money.

I know, I do it all the time. But the excess goes in the freezer, not on the table.

I ask them to serve themselves what they are going to eat and tell them I expect them to finish IF they choose the serving size themselves. If somebody else puts the food on the plate then I won't make them finish if they don't want it - being expected to do that is why I'm fat.

Sounds like they've been taught that it's ok to stop eating when you are full - which is sensible advice. So their portion control isn't great - perhaps your plates are bigger than the ones they have at home, so they find it hard to judge.

What this really suggests is that you are cooking too much in the first place.

Cooking extra is not cooking to excess, ffs, it's a smart use of time and money

Yeah, if you save half to eat at another meal it is. Not if you force people to eat it or throw it in the compost!