To wonder why somebody would go through life with no friends?

[damnedgrubble]

I don't mean no friends now, I mean no friends ever? Surely a person must have had at least one friend when they were at school?
I fail to see how this would happen to a person if I'm honest, it's so bizarre.

I've gone through 22 years with limited friends (no friends in some settings) and no boyfriend. I regulatory cry myself to sleep at night because I'm terrified I will die alone, single, friendless and childless. If I ever find out what I'm doing wrong I'll let you know :(

Bizarre? Definitely unreasonable. Dd1 has no friends. She has Aspergers. She'd love a friend. She currently in town with dh spending birthday money. She has no friends to go with, I'm at home with her sister. She also has Aspergers and no friends to hang out with. The odd thing is if you looked at them you'd never know. You'd just think they were bizarre for having no friends. Thanks for that.

Oh and I have no friends as I'm the mum of 2 aspies who got dropped and ignored once their difficulties became obvious. Bizarre eh?

Wonderful, OP. What do you think we should do, if we have no friends? Kill ourselves because we don't fit in with your idea of what is right or possible?

There's a poster on another thread admitting no-one has ever liked them. You start out that way by your parents not liking you and after that it's hard to find anyone who does. And even if people do like you, it's hard to recognise it because you don't know what to look for.

Open your heart a bit, OP. People come in all kinds, the befriended and the unbefriended are part of that.

I fail to see how this would happen to a person if I'm honest, it's so bizarre.

I find it bizarre that you find it bizarre.

No doubt someone else will be along shortly who finds it bizarre that I find it bizarre that you find it...

Bizarre? Definitely unreasonable. Dd1 has no friends. She has Aspergers. She'd love a friend. She currently in town with dh spending birthday money. She has no friends to go with, I'm at home with her sister. She also has Aspergers and no friends to hang out with. The odd thing is if you looked at them you'd never know. You'd just think they were bizarre for having no friends. Thanks for that. Oh and I have no friends as I'm the mum of 2 aspies who got dropped and ignored once their difficulties became obvious. Bizarre eh
Oh my. I'd overlooked Aspergers. I'm Aspie too. Its a shame for your girls Fabric but they'll come through and work out a life they can cope with, even if it has no 'friends' in it.

FFS. Easily done: a bit of anxiety, financial constraints, small DC, whatever.
Some people just struggle to build close relationships (me included!). I am very friendly and confident at work with my colleagues, "know" a lot of people but have a very limited circle of real friends. And I don't find it bizarre in the slightest.

Has anyone thought that the OP has no friends and that she is hoping to get advice on how to make some?

I find it much more 'bizarre' and 'saddening' (with a head tilt thrown in for good measure) that a grown adult is unable to imagine any of the reasons why some people have no friends.

Social anxiety in its many forms
Enjoying their own (and family members') company
Moving around a lot
Self-defence mechanism following bad experience
Some people live their lives differently to you

Take your pick.

If you really haven't got the empathy to imagine some people have never had a friend, then try and develop some.

Hopefully this thread will enlighten you a bit!

Unkind, OP. Very unkind.

There must be thousands of adult undiagnosed who are on the spectrum who have had no help or understanding on social interaction.

Well I generally don't like people and much prefer being on my own so it suits me perfectly. I am married but can go for days without talking to dh apart from "morning" and "hi" all day. Dh doesn't have any friends either. I have people I know and occasionally get invited out to the cinema, etc. But I wouldn't say I have friends, not in the ring someone up for a gossip, or go out for a day shopping type friendship.

Delightful post OP

Yay - another GF

damnedgrubble

It would be lovely to know about your friends - nothing specific, just the sorts of numbers you are talking about in your own situation. That would be helpful for some perspective.

Yes, wow. How 'weird' and 'bizarre'. Have you maybe thought that it's not through choice that some people don't have friends? I know a family member who is like this and it is due to a mental health condition. You thinking they are 'bizarre' is pretty super-unhelpful actually.

YANBVVVU!

Having said that, I have never known a soul who has gone through life without having at least one friend.

I am sure they exist, I just don't know any. And never have,

My family are mostly shit so without friends I'd hate to think how life would be for me.

I'm wildly jealous of people with close friends. My two closest friends are best friends with each other, which at best makes me feel a little of a third wheel at worst makes me feel like an unwanted cling on.

My DP was my closest friend, and I didn't realise how much security I felt with him until he left last week.

All these people on here who say they have no friends do they have a DP?

Sorry rent x post