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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think my childminder is taking the p**s?

67 replies

WeAreStars · 09/03/2017 07:22

Hi all, today my dd's childminder texted me to tell me she's not well (headache and sore throat) but still "open", she just wanted to let parents know she won't be taking the kids out anywhere. I'm not happy about dd going there if the childminder has a virus she may catch so I won't take her, but as she is saying she is still open and not actually cancelling as such I would still have to pay. AIBU to think she is taking the p**s? Surely if she's unwell she should just cancel?

OP posts:

JennyOnAPlate · 09/03/2017 07:24

If she cancelled she would have a host of parents complaining I imagine. It's cheeky of her to make it your decision though and I don't think she should be charging you for not sending your child to catch her germs!

ParadiseCity · 09/03/2017 07:25

I'd be pleased she could still have DC and I could still go to work tbh. You can catch a virus from so many places (she might have got it from a mindee or their parent!) I wouldn't worry about my child catching it. She's hardly going to be licking them.

WheresTheEvidence · 09/03/2017 07:26

I'm a nanny a headache and a sore groat wouldn't stop me doing my job but I wouldn't be going anywhere excessively noisy music class/soft play etc.

She is able to work and is open it is upto you whether you send ddress or not but she needs to be paid.

Snap8TheCat · 09/03/2017 07:26

CMs can't win. If she'd closed for 'a headache and sore throat' every time she had one you'd be calling her unreliable.

And chances are she's ill because someone sent a sick child to her in the first place.

a1992 · 09/03/2017 07:26

She would have already shared the germs depending on when your daughter was last there. It takes a little bit for the symptoms to come out

Euripidesralph · 09/03/2017 07:27

I have to say she may be considering those who would really struggle finding last minute child care....it may be she knows not all parents can be so cavalier about taking the day off

To be honest if consider this an upside to a childminder if they were honest but still offered the option if a parent needed the childc are desperately

I mean if they would lose their jobs ? Or needed to get to an all important interview that would mean themany being able to move the family out of a crap are?

I'd be impressed with her

SnugglyBedSocks · 09/03/2017 07:27

It's a sore throat....not bubonic plague! I'd still send.

Sirzy · 09/03/2017 07:28

I think she has done the sensible thing.

Surely that's one of the known risks of using a childminder?

insancerre · 09/03/2017 07:30

give yourself a shake
YABU

FlyingElbows · 09/03/2017 07:31

How is she taking the piss? She's just letting you know she's a bit under the weather and they won't be going out and about today. It's you who's going off on one about viruses! You're making a drama where there need not be one.

SookiesSocks · 09/03/2017 07:34

No shes not taking the piss. Shes let you know so as the parent you can make the choice.

You sound hard work.

rattieofcarcassone · 09/03/2017 07:38

Not taking the piss imo. I'd let parents know the same once I start childminding, it's what I used to do when nannying and parents were always fine with it, though one parent would always choose for me not to work and sent me home with a snuffly nose once too

rollonthesummer · 09/03/2017 07:40

No-she's not taking the piss!

TheOnlyColditz · 09/03/2017 07:41

What has she taken the piss about? She's given you the choice, make a decision and get over it.

Blodplod · 09/03/2017 07:41

I think you're childminder is being totally reasonable! And you are being incredibly unreasonable... she has offered to still take children despite feeling unwell to ensure she is not letting down at the last minute. Obviously not forcing parents to take unpaid leave or use up a days annual holiday which would cost the parents far more than a days childcare money (I assume). I'm guessing it's up to the individual parents if they feel their child would be at risk being looked after by someone who is unwell. Of course, your child could be there for the day and then the CM became ill during the day. Would you expect her to close halfway through the day and not pay her for those hours?

The fact she perhaps doesn't want to go traipsing out to the park, soft play etc is understandable.

Obviously, without looking into the finer details of any contract you have with her it's difficult to understand why you are obliged to pay if she has admitted to being poorly and you feel you don't want that risk to your child. But I think she's been very honest, open and done her best to cover all options without letting people down.

MiniCooperLover · 09/03/2017 07:42

She's got what sounds like a cold. If you need to send your child then send them. All it means is they're having a quieter day at home.

Blodplod · 09/03/2017 07:43

'Your childminder' not you're...

LagunaBubbles · 09/03/2017 07:46

Yabu. It's only a headache and a sore throat. If we be at went to work when we have these my work would be empty. Stop being so precious or change to a nursery if using a child minder doesn't suit you. The world is full of viruses.

Megatherium · 09/03/2017 07:47

If you refuse to send your children near anyone who has a headache and a sore throat, you are going to have to imprison them at home. She's being completely reasonable.

hibbledobble · 09/03/2017 07:48

I would be very happy my childminder was staying open, rather than leaving me in the lurch at the last minute.

yabu and precious. Do you ever take your dc on public transport? Plenty of people with viruses there!

icelollycraving · 09/03/2017 07:49

I think she sounds sensible. That's the thing with cms and why I haven't used one. It's stressful enough working and getting children to daycare but when it rests on one person,this will happen. If you had no option but to work she could still have children which seems fair. Just letting you know it's a quiet day not full of activities. Yabu.

GrumpyOldBag · 09/03/2017 07:55

Good grief. As a parent do you stop everything and avoid contact with your child when you get a headache and sore throat?

Tanith · 09/03/2017 07:57

Exactly what I would do. Parents need to work and, if I cancelled every time I caught a cold from one of the kids, I'd fast get a reputation for being unreliable.

She hasn't told you not to send your child, just that it will be a quiet day.
In a nursery, you wouldn't even be told.

EineKleine · 09/03/2017 07:58

I think this is normal. Her other option is leaving you in the lurch, and that would much less professional.

My children were at nursery and would mix with someone who had a cold every day.

IHopeYouStepOnALegoPiece · 09/03/2017 07:58

Fucks sake...for every parent like you, there's 10 who want to know why she's closed for just a headache..."can you not just keep the kids at home and not go out anywhere"

Bet she can't bloody win either way can she

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