Page 3 | AIBU to think my childminder is taking the p**s?

WeAreStars · 2017-03-09T07:22:20+00:00

Hi all, today my dd's childminder texted me to tell me she's not well (headache and sore throat) but still "open", she just wanted to let parents know she won't be taking the kids out anywhere. I'm not happy about dd going there if the childminder has a virus she may catch so I won't take her, but as she is saying she is still open and not actually cancelling as such I would still have to pay. AIBU to think she is taking the p**s? Surely if she's unwell she should just cancel?

brasty · 09/03/2017 10:15

I can tell you as an ex nursery worker, we still went to work when ill. Because we couldn't afford not to. Difference is we would not have told you we were not well.

Snap8TheCat · 09/03/2017 10:20

Why do you want it deleted? Because you were being unreasonable?

meettherussians · 09/03/2017 10:33

OP no, YOU are taking the P. She must know what hell it is when a child-minder announces,usually on the morning or night before that she/her DC are ill and you have basically no time to find other childcare so either take a days holiday or pull a sickie from work. Its so stressful, she did you a favour, be kind and grateful - get her something to cheer her up- and reconsider your appalling attitude.

lougle · 09/03/2017 10:40

Although....being devil's advocate... I think the point is that the OP is paying for a service. If she normally pays £24 for 6hrs childminding, which includes daily outdoor activities of some sort, then that is the service she pays for. The Childminder is saying "Just to let you know, I'm available for your child to come today, but due to illness, I'm not providing my full service." As the terms of their contract will say that if the CM is open for business and the parent chooses not to send the child, the parent pays, this forces the parent to either send the child and pay £24 for less than a full service. Or Keep the child at home and pay £24 anyway.

If the childminder had said "just to let you know, I'm a bit under the weather (sore throat and headache) so although I'm open today, I won't be going out anywhere. If you'd rather not send your child due to this, there will be no charge for the day.", then I think the CM would be completely reasonable.

Snap8TheCat · 09/03/2017 10:58

lougle it's all about give and take isn't it? I do all sorts of favours for my families which aren't strictly in the contract because I'm a nice person and like to help out if I can, but if I had a family who deduced money from my invoice because I didn't go out one day when I wasn't 100% I can guarantee those favours would dry up pretty quickly.

NewPuppyMum · 09/03/2017 11:12

You can't delete a thread because you don't like the responses.

I suspect it's obvious that the OP thinks she's taking the piss as a headache and a sore throat is nothing and texting that message means the CM has a win win. Paid for not working or a trouper for soldiering on.

Nicknacky · 09/03/2017 11:34

Good to see you realise you were being over cautious.

I will be annoyed if mn delete this thread as it goes against their own guidlines!

lougle · 09/03/2017 11:52

Snap and that's brilliant, but we don't know that this CM is like that, and as is frequently stated on MN, CMs are self-employed, so set their terms and conditions, and are not employed. So the starting point when we consider the OP's post is that it is a contract between a service provider and a client, not mates who do favours. Which means that she should be able to expect a level of service.

Roomster101 · 09/03/2017 11:56

I can see what you mean OP as normally if a self employed person was unable to provide their usual service and you therefore chose not to use their service you wouldn't expect to pay. However, I doubt that your contract with her states that she will take the children out and about every single day. She just has to look after them and if she is able to do that she is "open for business" as she say.

Willow2017 · 09/03/2017 12:32

Although....being devil's advocate... I think the point is that the OP is paying for a service. If she normally pays £24 for 6hrs childminding, which includes daily outdoor activities of some sort, then that is the service she pays for. The Childminder is saying "Just to let you know, I'm available for your child to come today, but due to illness, I'm not providing my full service." As the terms of their contract will say that if the CM is open for business and the parent chooses not to send the child, the parent pays, this forces the parent to either send the child and pay £24 for less than a full service. Or Keep the child at home and pay £24 anyway.

The op is paying for a place at the cm.
The cm is still caring for the child, still feeding them, playing with them, doing activities indoors, still changing nappies, still taking them to the toilet. Just cos they dont go out to some other activitiy doesnt mean she isnt providing a service.

The fact is she is still open and taking the kids so if the parent decides that the 'outdoor activity' which may mean just a walk outside that day due to time constraints, weather etc is the most important thing the cm does that day and they wont send their child because they are not doing it or not paying for the session because of this then they are being vu. The child isnt going to be traumatised for life because they dont go out anywhere for one day!

lougle · 09/03/2017 12:51

Fine, so why did the CM feel the need to tell the parents that she wouldn't be going outdoors with them? Unless it is usually part of their daily activity?

Roomster101 · 09/03/2017 13:54

Fine, so why did the CM feel the need to tell the parents that she wouldn't be going outdoors with them? Unless it is usually part of their daily activity?

Perhaps she just wanted to let everyone know she had a cold/sore throat in the hope that some people would chose not to send their child! You can't blame her really for wanting to cut down on the number of children she looks after when she isn't well.

Doglikeafox · 09/03/2017 13:59

YABU lol. I'm a childminder and working with children means that during the winter months you pretty much permanently have a cold. I have had 4 so far since December! There is no way I would close for one, and there is no way I could afford to lose all my income every time I had one.
You understand this is her job that pays the bills right? She doesn't get sick pay.
I think it was very considerate of her to let everyone know that she isn't feeling great, that way if you know that you have something going on you definitely don't want poorly children for (e.g. weekend away, swimming trip etc) you could minimise the chances by keeping them home.
Would you expect to keep your child at home if they had a minor cold and pay her regardless of the fact he wasn't with her?

Original poster

WeAreStars · 09/03/2017 14:04

Thank you doyouwantabrew.

Can people please stop commenting? I have said several times throughout the the thread that I can see the other side of the coin now and realise I was being unreasonable.

Having an opinion is one thing but some of you have been downright rude and you know who you are. I would suggest you speak to people online in the same way you would if you spoke to their face. There is a human being on the other side of this you know.

OP posts:

Snap8TheCat · 09/03/2017 14:12

Well what's good for the goose is good for the gander? Did you tell your CM that she is taking the piss to her face? Or is it just ok to slag her off behind her back?

SookiesSocks · 09/03/2017 14:58

Just hide the thread OP.

ALemonyPea · 09/03/2017 15:05

Op, first rule of MN, don't post in AIBU if you can't handle it, it's not for the faint hearted.

Glad you've realised you've BU. a lot of people wouldn't come back and admit it. And please, use the word piss rather than using , we are all grown ups here.