To advise MIL to tell this woman to fuck right off

[IllBeAtTheBarIfYouNeedMe]

To be honest I don't think I am but My lovely future MIL has just called to ask advise after receiving a phonecall from her grandsons friends mother. Apparently this woman has rent arrears of 10 thousand pounds and is looking for MIL to lend her the money to avoid eviction. MIL has never even met this woman.

Both DP and I have suggested that if she were to she isn't likely to see much, if any, of it back and that this woman's problems aren't hers.

She could probably afford it but I don't see why she should have to.

Am I missing something here?

Jesus fuck, if it's a nice thing to do that DGS can give her the money. That is only an acceptable thing to say if DGS is about 10.

No way. Absolutely no way.

Glad dp is taking action to protect his mum.

I would be speaking to the dgs as well. I wonder if he was expecting a 'commission' from the £10,000.

As lovely as your MIL is, she needs to give this woman the biggest fuck off that she can muster!

Don't give the woman a penny!

I work for the police and they would be very interested in something like this and scams like this nearly always involve a family member or close family friend. Please consider reporting this to stop any future scams, if this one doesn't work and it is anything to do with DIL or DGS you can guarantee they won't stop until they get what they want!!!

How can this person have run up 10K in arrears and not already have been evicted?

I was gonna say this. How many Landlords would ever let it get to that stage.

Scam for sure

Scam scam scam. Glad your DP is keeping a close eye on this.

Yes, please do inform the police. You should have a CSU in your area (Community Support Unit) who are a multi agency team, and will be able to talk to your MIL about this, and look into concerns around this woman. If her need is genuine (I doubt it but you never know...) then they should be able to help her access support and information.

This is a really worrying situation, and needs addressing. Usually people will start off asking for small amounts and build up to larger sums, but her audacity is staggering. Luckily your MIL has loved ones around her to stop any thoughts of handing any money over, however there will be other more vulnerable people out there that this woman will no doubt target.

I thought scam first off too. This woman lives in council accommodation and I'm pretty sure that the councils would be on it long before the arrears got that big.

i think we are definitely going to speak to the police even if to show dgs how inappropriate his actions are (and to scare him if his intentions were anything other then naive)

The grandson reckons it would be a nice favour for him?? . Was that lost in translation, by any chance, because it's frankly unbelievable?

Wow seriously some people have no shame. I could never ask someone I've never met to fix my problems. £10,000 is a lot of arrears and must have taken quite a while to build up, surely the lady could have got a job/other help in this time if things were that bad.

How old is DGS?

Even if she were renting privately, the landlord would have taken action long before the arrears got that big. It's obviously a lie and a scam.

Good for you OP
I definately smell a rat. Think its a scam cooked up by dil and dgs and getting other woman in on it to provide the sob story.
Def tell police scare them to death!

Depends how old dgs is - if hes younger he could have been carefully fed a lot of "oh dear, i wish we could afford food, its a shame your gran couldnt help us out with all the money she has...."

council house rent arrears of £10k?

Really....?

Unless a housing benefit claim was found to be fraudulent and the money demanded back (and this scamme would most lik y be facing jail), it is a total pack of lies.

The ex dil sounds most likely

I'd be reporting it to 101 and blocking that caller's number from the phone.
There is nothing normal or acceptable about phoning a virtual stranger and asking for £10,000.

Well obviously it's a big fat NO for this woman but I would want to know why she thought to ring your MiL and how she got her number.

It sounds like dgs is scamming his granny. I'd get your DP to talk to dgs again and say they you are considering reporting this to the police

I don't think you need to scare DGS at all.

I think it's likely DGS is suckered in too and wants to help. Not realising that arrears of that magnitude the person asking would have been evicted a long time back, unless they're living in somewhere really quite posh, which I doubt.

I would always give people the benefit of the doubt. I think your DP just telling the woman no is enough. If I was in that situation I would think about trying to help practically over monetarily.

It does seem like an odd situation.

Def police as a warning to anyone involved however well meaning eg exDIL and her son. Are you about to marry exDIL's exDH?

It might also be worth checking if her bank card and/or online banking details are safe and she hasn't given them to anyone "helpfully" offering to do shopping/checking her statements/etc. And perhaps let her bank know on her say so that no large or regular amounts should be withdrawn without a double check with her. Might also be worth doing a Power of Attorney for financial matters.

So sorry for your future MIL if it proves trouble was up and she was being scammed. It will rock her confidence and faith in people. Is her DGS your future husband's son? I'm glad he had a firm word.

How old is the grandson? I'm assuming older teen.

This needs nipping in the bud now. I would speak to the police and find out if the woman has form.

I can't imagine ever having the brass neck to ask a complete stranger for £10k. I am glad your DH is going to tell her to fuck off

Elvish Giving people the benefit of the doubt is all very nice if they're someone you know well in a spot of financial difficulty who maybe needs a few quid even a few hundred to help out in an emergency but when it's a complete stranger asking for a 10k handout for rent arrears a healthy skepticism is not unreasonable. In this case if the Dgs is not in on this blatant scam he's clearly very gullible/vulnerable himself and especially if those using him are aware how much he is favoured by grandma.

I wouldn't even give/lend £10,000 to anyone I KNOW, let alone someone I don't know! In fact I wouldn't even lend £100 to them! Good grief! I agree with the people saying it may be advisable to inform the police.