To think 19 is a bit too old to START ballet and gymnastics?

[Stedloop]

DD is 19.

Has never done ballet or gymnastics in her whole life so a complete, complete beginner.

She says she would like to become good at it.

This is my worry.

Fine I think for fun, but she does go on about trying hard to become good at it.

She is at uni (local) so I know it's not some weird change of career idea. However, AIBU to think it is a bit too old to have an ambition of becoming good at it?

I have no issue if just for fun.

If it is as a hobby then fine. Hopefully no unrealistic expectations though.

I agree that I don't really understand why you are pissing on her chips.

When I was at uni I started fencing and Russian. Fencing never took, Russian did.But my life has been enriched by both those things.

She's 19. She's enthusiastic about something. Don't narrow her world.

If it is as a hobby then fine. Hopefully no unrealistic expectations though.

And the problem with unrealistic expectations is what exactly?

If OPs DD wants to be good at something, she can. 19 is no age for that. It doesn't mean she will be Olympic level but OP hasn't said she wants to be, either.

OP is saying her DD cannot become good at it. Plenty of PPs pointing out otherwise, and more importantly how damaging it is to hear continuous put downs from your own parents.

Start saving up for your DDs therapy bills, OP, just like my DPs have had to do. In time you may wish you had had your own attitude sorted.

I frankly can't believe how idiotic the OPs posts are.

Any parent with any common sense would be delighted their teenage DC wants to start a healthy hobby, when 90% of people her age do not exercise anywhere near enough, use drugs, alcohol, whatnot...

So I ask you again OP, you think your DD will never be good at anything, and she should just stick to being a couch potato? I would hazard a guess OP is a TV addict couch potato herself

Why does wanting to dance or do gymnastics have to mean wanting to be prima a ballerina or Olympic medalist? So many people are doing these activities for many other reasons- like exercise and keeping fit, social benefits, discipline, musicality and stress relief. My teen DD has been dancing for many years and has no aspirations to be a professional dancer. The benefits of dance have positively influenced her life in terms of fitness, friendships and in particular confidence gained from the personal achievement.

Ballet is being recommended for everyone from sportspeople to pensioners so if your DD wants to give it a go, what's the problem?

I pay for DS's music lessons while he is at uni (year 3) and said I'd do the same for her. so I'll pay half of each

Is your son going to become a top concert pianist?

And why has your son had music lessons, no questions asked, but you are being negative about your daughter's recreational pursuits?

Why wasn't your daughter offered ballet or gymnastics lessons earlier? Did you just assume she'd be no good, and so not encourage her?

I still do a lot of dance at nearly 60 (just come from a 4 hour workshop for a new form of contemporary dance). I roll around on the floor, jump across the floor & pirouette with the others. I go to one studio where there's a woman still taking class at nearly 80.

YABU.

Please support her.

I started karate at 35- similar in terms of flexibility, strength etc.

I'm now 48, the most flexible person in my classes- and about to take my 3rd dan black belt.

Is that 'good'? I'd say so.

Your DD is only 19- there isn't any reason why, with proper training, lots of stamina and effort, she should not become 'good', if not excellent, at her chosen activity.

Please don't belittle her ambitions- it will only damage your relationship with her (trust me, I know, having a mother myself who has never stopped naysaying my karate career).

Really don't understand what your concerns are OP.

OP probably expected a thread full of "YY your DD is a fool for thinking she'd be any good at ballet or gymnastics, she's too old, don't bother"

Then OP could have shown that thread to her DD as an additional stick to beat her with.

Unsurprisingly OP has disappeared. Probably not going to change her ways. I cannot fathom how someone can be so disencouraging to their own DC. Or perhaps it is OPs parents who did the same to her and so it continues...

I've just started learning the violin and I'm nearly 31! If she wants to try something new and it's affordable let her go for it.