Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wear my 'baby on board badge' when I'm not pregnant

128 replies

Southeastlondonmum · 02/03/2017 21:15

Regular poster, have name changed. Have been debating this issue for sometime.
I have a problem that makes it difficult to stand and walk. It's being investigated and I am may have to have a significant operation but the NHS is very slow. I'm in pain most of the time but the main thing that makes it worse is my commute. I have to travel at peak time and although I have changed my route to involve the least walking and I work from home twice a week, I'm standing on the tube up to 2 hours a day. It's killing me. I don't have a stick and look externally fine. I often ask for a seat but it gets exhausting to have to ask three times each journey to sit down (changes). Today I stood for two hours and I can barely walk now. My friend thinks I should wear my old 'baby on board' but despite the pain, I think it's immoral.
Thoughts?
(By the way, if anyone knows how to get the new TFL 'less able to stand' badge please let me know)

OP posts:
Crispbutty · 02/03/2017 21:17

Use a stick. It really will help to lean on it if you have to stand. It also may make other passengers realise you struggle to stand too.

DoomGloomAndKaboom · 02/03/2017 21:17

I would get a stick, personally. You can get ones that fold up.

BendingSpoons · 02/03/2017 21:18

I think they were trialling some 'I need a seat' badges?

RoboticSealpup · 02/03/2017 21:18

I'd get a crutch.

Iamastonished · 02/03/2017 21:19

A third vote for a stick. My sister has a fold up one.

Original poster
Southeastlondonmum · 02/03/2017 21:19

I'm not actually sure a stick would help. Though I take the point it's worth a try and may attract attention...

OP posts:
Crispbutty · 02/03/2017 21:19

You can get really cool sticks too now. Debenhams and John Lewis have some bright colourful Ones that are fold up too.

WillowGreen · 02/03/2017 21:19

TFL have badges for passengers with hidden disabilities. Could you get one of those instead.

Rhayader · 02/03/2017 21:20

Imagine bumping into someone you know...

dementedma · 02/03/2017 21:20

Baby on board is super tacky even if you are Pg. Why don't you take/use a stick?

Original poster
Southeastlondonmum · 02/03/2017 21:20

bending it seems like a trial and I don't know how to get hold of one

OP posts:
Crispbutty · 02/03/2017 21:21

I get really bad sciatica occasionally and a stick to shift weight into when standing has really made a difference.

BendingSpoons · 02/03/2017 21:21

Yep just looked, they are actually 'Please give me a seat' badges.

Palegreenstars · 02/03/2017 21:21

Hey, my doc was telling me today about a 'priority seat' card you can get on Southern, which you can apply for on their website. Maybe other transport links have similar?

Original poster
Southeastlondonmum · 02/03/2017 21:21

Have thought about bumping into people including colleagues but most people know about my ongoing condition

OP posts:
Avioleta · 02/03/2017 21:22

The OP has said she doesn't think a stick will help. Personally, I think the OP needs a seat on the tube more than the majority of other users. Does it really matter if someone is offering her a seat becuse she has a 'baby on board' badge or a 'less able to stand' one? The end result is the same. Yes, you are not pg, but you do need to sit down so I think you should use your badge while you investigate getting one for hidden disabilities.

5moreminutes · 02/03/2017 21:23

Don't wear the baby on board badge - do people even stand for those? I'd be surprised if many did. Agree get a fold up stick you can keep in your bag - dual purpose to actually lean on and as a far more noticeable "badge" / signal that you can't stand as well as others.

OddShoe · 02/03/2017 21:24

I don't think it's immoral. I'm pregnant with dc3 at the moment but I don't have any health problems so could easily stand on the tube, your need would trump mine!

Otherwise you could take a fold up stick so you can just put it in your bag if you don't need it while walking.

Trills · 02/03/2017 21:26

Baby on board is super tacky even if you are Pg

No it's not. It's really helpful.

Polite and alert people will see it and offer you a seat.

Less polite or less alert people will respond more quickly to your request for a seat, if the request is associated with a visible reason for your asking.

Do the people doubting the usefulness of these actually use public transport?

HopelesslydevotedtoGu · 02/03/2017 21:26

Well, if you need to sit down, I wouldn't mind whether you achieve that by asking, a stick, a less able to stand badge, or an inaccurate baby badge. An honest approach is best, but if that isn't feasible I wouldn't resent you using a baby badge.

Until I was extremely pregnant I still had to ask for a seat though, I think commuters can be in their own little world and not notice you. I know what you mean about finding the asking exhausting. I started asking the moment I got on, before I had time to think about it and start feeling shy/ awkward. It became automatic- step on, ask for a seat.

Trills · 02/03/2017 21:26

It's not more immoral than using a parent-and-child parking space if you have no child but do have an injury/illness.

RustyPaperclip · 02/03/2017 21:27

I really feel for you. DH has an ongoing condition which makes standing incredibly painful at times. He has recently been working in London and has had to use crutches and I was shocked that people rarely offer him a seat. It worries me how people cope commuting with less visible mobility issues. I am guilty of zoning out on a morning commute but I always try to be aware of people around me who might need a seat. I wasn't aware of the 'less able to stand badges' but they sound like a good idea. It might be immoral, but do what you can to cope Smile

5moreminutes · 02/03/2017 21:27

I don't think it's immoral either, just not the most effective way of going about getting a seat. Also you'll inevitably sit next to a heavily pregnant lady if you do get a seat and she'll be the only chatty commuter in London and try to engage you in baby talk for 2 hours...

lalalalyra · 02/03/2017 21:29

I think people are more likely to notice a stick than a badge tbh.

SparklyLeprechaun · 02/03/2017 21:31

I can't see the problem with wearing the badge, but I think a stick would be better. I've got back problems, on bad days I use a stick, I always get offered a seat (I feel awkard declining), people are careful to make way for me. It works like magic.