To wear my 'baby on board badge' when I'm not pregnant

[Southeastlondonmum]

Regular poster, have name changed. Have been debating this issue for sometime.
I have a problem that makes it difficult to stand and walk. It's being investigated and I am may have to have a significant operation but the NHS is very slow. I'm in pain most of the time but the main thing that makes it worse is my commute. I have to travel at peak time and although I have changed my route to involve the least walking and I work from home twice a week, I'm standing on the tube up to 2 hours a day. It's killing me. I don't have a stick and look externally fine. I often ask for a seat but it gets exhausting to have to ask three times each journey to sit down (changes). Today I stood for two hours and I can barely walk now. My friend thinks I should wear my old 'baby on board' but despite the pain, I think it's immoral.
Thoughts?
(By the way, if anyone knows how to get the new TFL 'less able to stand' badge please let me know)

"I sturggle to stand, please offer me a seat" sounds good to me. It's your own badge so whatever wording feels comfortable for you is fine.

The badge is good, but I'd go for a stick too! I have used one ever since a very entitled man decided that his wife and child needed the seat more than me and turfed me out. There were plenty of (presumably) able-bodied people he could have picked on. I was housebound for three days afterwards and lost out on the work I had come to London to do. You need to protect yourself from gits like this in every way you can.

dementedma I get the feeling you don't live in London and might be getting confused with those "Baby on Board" pennants some people stick in the back window of their cars. Those ARE tacky. The TfL Baby on Board badge has an official TfL logo on it and is meant to be a slightly humorous way of confirming that one is pregnant not fat. They are very widely used.

IMO having a walking stick rarely makes a difference to whether you are offered a seat. This is my experience on the tube anyway. On buses it's nowhere near as bad and I nearly always get offered a seat if the bus is packed. But for some reason I have never been able to fathom out,the vast majority of people on tube trains have no manners. I have lost count of the times that I have literally been stood right next to a 'priority seat' whilst the person occupying it studiously ignores me.

I had chronic health problems for about 18 months while waiting for surgery (which then went horribly wrong and I ended up unable to stand upright for about 3 months after I got out of hospital). I was commuting into central London every day (train and tube, about 80 mins each way).

This was before the 'I need a seat' badges. (I wrote to TFL suggesting badges for people with invisible illnesses and disabilities back in 2010 and was told they were 'unnecessary' ) I asked for a seat at first but got responses like 'there's nothing wrong with you', or just a simple 'fuck off'. In the end I got a baby on board badge and am so glad I did. Not having to stand for 2 hours a day made the pain at least manageable.

Sounds good Southeast. Hope it makes the journey easier and that it's soon unnecessary!

Go to TFL travel centre at a main station and see what badges they have available. Or call TFL. I also think a stick is a good idea as people will recognize it as a sign that you need a seat.

I see you are making a badge-I would also get a stick.

I will always offer a seat but to be fair I'm not sure without any identifying things/no outward signs saying you need one that I would offer you one as can be awkward.

If you were wearing your snazzy new badge and had a stick I'd be out of seat like a rocket. I do think go with both as people may need a visible sign to notice.

Look forward to hearing how wonderful your commute is

YABU to lie about why you need a seat. Carry a stick - you say it may not help your condition, but it would help indicate to other commuters that you are not able-bodied, and need a seat.

To update for those that understandably don't want to read the whole thread

1. I have pre-registered for TFL badge scheme which is not live yet.
2. I have ordered my own badge which says 'I need a seat' in the meantime. Will report back on effectiveness

Yes, I'm in southeast London. The best journey to limit my walking is bus, overground train (always packed), jubilee line (crammed)

From memory the new TFL badges are a response to someone who made his own "cancer on board" badge when he was travelling to chemo appointments and couldn't speak because he had throat cancer.
As a regular public transport user in London I love badges like this because it takes away doubt. The same with a walking stick, even if you don't really need it it does act as a clearly visible signal that you have a greater need for a seat.

I have a please offer me a seat badge and I took part in the trial - they do work and are due to be rolled out soon. Around 50% of the time I am spontaneously offered a seat, 25% I ask and get a seat and the other 25% of time I cannot physically get to a seat to ask as it's soooo busy.

However, I have lost my badge :( so I am wearing a baby on board badge that I think gets me a seat around 70% of the time. People can be very nice, no awkward conversations either!

Other times, people clock the badge and ignore but I don't always feel confident to ask. I am quite unwell at the moment so really do need to sit down.

I saw a lady wearing both badges the other day

Op I once saw an elderly gent slide to the floor on a busy tube.
There was a moment of silence, then he shouted "right, I'm sitting on the floor now, is that what it'll take for any of you to offer me a bloody seat!"
Several people leapt up immediately!

archery in the one where you coyly say you have a baby "on board" rather than just the fact you are pregnant.

But I take note of the post by another poster who says they are official things in London, unlike the cheesy car pennants.

Scare away the other commuters with one of these ?

Dementedma that was me . Here's a pic. It's a harmless play on words given that the baby is on board both the tube and the female commuter.

YABU to lie about why you need a seat.

How on earth is that unreasonable? If someone needs a seat, they need a seat. It's not up to the person sitting down to decide how worthy they are, so why does it matter what reason they give?

If the reason doesn't matter then men who have difficulties standing might as well wear "Baby on Board" badges too, until the other sort is available!

The thing is, if someone who doesn't look pregnant, which the OP wouldn't because she's not (yes I have read her latest post this is just general) that wouldn't mean that she needs a seat. It could just mean that she's happy to be pregnant and wants everyone to know. Yes, a heavily pregnant woman would get offered a seat, but otherwise the badge could just be saying "Yippee! I'm having a baby!" and not "I can't stand for long".

The point of the "Baby on Board" badge is most definitely not to say "Yippee! I'm having a baby!" It's to make it clear the woman is likely to need/want a seat.

Well if they'd been around many aeons ago when I was pregnant, I might've worn one for that reason, because "Yippee! I'm having a baby!" might've been what I was thinking all the time. Possibly

I sympathise OP - I remember the hell in the pre-badge days when I was 30+ weeks pregnant, also being on crutches with a broken foot. I have found that the standard of manners varies from line to line. The District Line seems to have the best manners - usually got several offers of a seat so if you could switch to that it might help... FWIW the southern end of the Northern Line is dire - have on several occasions seen young guys pushing and shoving elderly and pregnant women to get on first and nab a seat...

I have a 'please offer me a seat' badge. People don't notice it but if I politely ask to sit down they immediately clock it and I've always got a seat after asking.