Does anyone remember the bride in Wales charging £££ for hotel rooms?

[cousinswedding]

I don't know of any of you will remember me. I posted months ago when my cousin was planning her wedding in a Welsh castle hundreds of miles away from where we all live. Her wedding is a three day event starting on a Thursday and she asked us to pay to stay in the rooms (£160 per night). When other pulled out she contacted us and said the rooms had gone up so were now £180 so at least £360 for accommodation but more likely three nights so £540. Just for accommodation. My mum is pressuring me to go and we have booked it and waved goodbye to the prospect of a family holiday.

Anyway- cousin and I (used to be close she's been a nightmare in all this) got together today as she wanted to come over and see my outfit for the wedding (in two weeks). She got really frosty with me as my dress is a nude colour- is this a thing?? She's asking me to change it and wear something else. The dress is new and was bought specifically for this occasion and I do have an old green one I could wear but I have worn it to another family wedding and I don't like it that much. The dress I've bought is not cream, more like a pale peach. The bride is wearing white.

I'm loathe to waste more money (can't take it back took the tags off) and resent being ordered around like this. Is nude ok for a wedding or AIBU?

WHAT. A. BITCH.

Cancel, OP. She doesn't deserve to have you at her wedding.

She's wanting you and other guests to spend a fortune in accommodation and give up paid leave in order to crowdfund her wedding and she's your cousin not your daughter and you can't even be that close friends since you're not in the wedding party yet your AIBU is: is my dress ok?

She's walking all over you and you've helpfully removed your spine in case so she breaks a heel on it.

Get a travel lodge or something if there's one nearby and say you can't afford the hotel ... they should be okay with that

I wouldn't go!

Bollocks to your mum. Stop trying to make everyone else happy?

Can you cancel and get the money back? I would not be going to the wedding and spending all this money on someone who would speak to me like that. Fuck it, even if you can't get the money back then I would cancel anyway. The money is gone no matter what you do. If you lose all the money on the booking then at least you won't lose further money in the petrol to get there, food and drink etc.

Don't let you mum talk you round.

But all you'll get from your mum is the peace keeper act and she'll probably agree with the bride zilla. I just wouldn't go! Or maybe do and then you can report back to mn

Honestly I'm really timid and don't like conflict but she really needs telling to fuck off now. I don't think I'd mind falling out with her at this point.

OMG..I remember your last thread..When is this Wedding? I love the dress a bargain at £19..

Oh my goodness. Raging for you.

I would text her, say you have ordered another dress, but you can't afford the hotel and have booked a travel lodge.

My BIL and wife booked somewhere where you had to take the rooms as a package which cost £240 each but they just included that in the price of the venue and gave them to people who needed them. Wouldn't have dreamt of charging!

I would politely tell your mum to get stuffed and not go to the wedding.

I can understand she's acting kind of crazy but the dress is a little, I dunno...more summer party than wedding guest. It's all the lace cutouts. It looks great on the model but a) if it was only 19 quid, it's not going to look like that in rl and b) if you have any fat on your midriff at all, it's not going to be a good look.

That said, she has no right to be telling you how to dress. And nor do I, come to think of it!

My DD was supposed to be bridesmaid for her friend but was " sacked " ! Her crime was to have blond highlights put into her hair ; bride is blonde and insisted that her 6 bridesmaids had to be brunette ! Another bridesmaid was sacked for " not being enthusiastic enough". The wedding invitation arrived with a request for money ( bank account details included ) to pay for a Caribbean honeymoon plus details of dress code. Men could wear kilts or lounge suits but no pink ties / cravats or waistcoats , women - NO hats or fascinators other than bridal party, no strapless dresses and nothing in white, cream, pink or nude ! There was other stuff but Bridezilla might be reading ........

Your dress is lovely! The way your cousin has spoken to you is disgraceful and I couldn't imagine being 'close' to her ever again after that! That being the case - just cancel. It will not be worth your time/effort and no doubt there will be a lot of awkward hugs/kisses/conversations throughout the day and the days before. Personally, I couldn't bear it. Good luck OP!

Back out now, and take your family on holiday somewhere sunny for a week instead.

stillgotit 😱 No!

Ridiculous!

The last thing I would want to do at this stage would be attend this wedding. I wouldn't care if my Mum was going to moan about it. This person does not deserve your presence.

Good luck with your mum. We'll have the waiting at an appropriate time.

Agree with lemon, I wouldn't be going and I wouldn't care because I wouldn't be seeing her afterwards either. Don't pander to her. Just send the present and the card I order to be the bigger person.

Get a spine, OP! Lab up and tell them all to get stuffed.

Beautiful dress, BTW.

stillgotit that's outrageous ! What happens to some of these brides ? Its like they are directing a film set. You wonder how long these marraiges will actually last when people are so controlling.

Sounds like your DD had a lucky escape

Oh my god - I'm hooked. OP - you are being unbelievably patient. Your cousin is a complete dick.

You dress is lovely, please don't wear something else.

Tell her you are happy to compromise and will be wearing a suitable jacket to cover your dress. Then go a charity shop and buy the most garish one you can find for wedding photo purposes Budget no more than £1.50.

It will look so dreadful that she will be begging you to take it off.

I would be tempted to cancel the whole thing and let her fund the castle. Explain you haven't the money to get a new dress so decided it fairer to decline the invite.

Scanning the thread it sounds like you haven't paid for the room.
Just don't go. Your relationship is already ruined, why waste any more time or money on someone so ungrateful?

WHat planet is this girl on??