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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not want to use the gift.

241 replies

Mumtobe12 · 01/03/2017 21:16

Now I don't want to sound ungrateful but MIL is very excited about new arrival which is lovely. But the other day she brought us a Moses basket with out us seeing first and well it so not what I envisioned. It silk and covered in lace looks like something straight out of queen Victoria's nursery.
I don't know what to do DH doesn't want to hurt MIL feelings and has already told her how pretty it is and how much we like it. But I really don't and know he is not a big fan either,
I do appreciate the kindness of the gift but I'm a bit upset I didn't get to pick this out myself.
I have attached picture so you can see for yourself.
What can I do? I can't not use it now?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
JustSpeakSense · 02/03/2017 19:23

Omg is truly hideous.

Why on earth did DH say you liked it!?

kittybiscuits · 02/03/2017 19:24

Oh my friend got a tiny bit of fag ash on it and pouff...all that nylon was gone in a second...

Loopytiles · 02/03/2017 19:27

DH needs to tell her to return it, on safety grounds.

CoolJazz · 02/03/2017 19:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dowhatnow · 02/03/2017 19:40

But what about when the next hideous present arrives? Bite the bulllet. Get DH to tell them he was being polite before but that actually you both really dislike it and could they get their money back or change it for something less fussy as you both like plainer things.

CoolJazz · 02/03/2017 19:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FlaviaAlbia · 02/03/2017 20:10

Tell her your midwife has said it doesn't meet SIDs guidelines and you can't use it, alas, better safe than sorry etc.

That way you won't give offence and your baby won't stick to walls with static...

Peanutandphoenix · 02/03/2017 22:20

Oh wow op that thing is fucking hideous now would be a good time to consider how flammable silk is by taking it outside and accidently on purpose dropping a lit match in it and dancing round it singing burn baby burn

HappydaysArehere · 02/03/2017 22:45

My grandson refused to sleep in his lovely cradle. Only slept in his car seat. Nothing else worked. In no time he was in his bigger cot. Don't let it worry you. Concentrate on his pram/push chair etc. These Moses baskets have a very short time before being redundant. Not worth getting upset about. Just have a little laugh! Good luck.

ethelb · 02/03/2017 23:07

You must be able to take the fabric off. They got it on some how.. Hmm

WasabiNell · 02/03/2017 23:56

Haven't read through all the posts but I've just noticed a cat in the bottom left of the first pic, sniffing it thinking 'what the fuck is that' Grin

ilovepixie · 03/03/2017 00:04

The cat seems to like it. Wouldn't it be awful if the cat jumped into it and poohed and weed all over it. Couldn't use it for a baby then!

ItShouldHaveBeenJingleJess · 03/03/2017 00:09

When I first glanced at the picture, I though it was a toilet covered in tin foil. Perhaps it's time for an eye test 😀

KillDora · 03/03/2017 00:11

Do you have a spare room?

Hide it in there. Then just wheel it out and pop the baby in when MIL arrival is imminent.

She can 'outgrow' it quickly Wink

TeethDrama · 03/03/2017 00:15

If you like your mil & she is possibly lining up to be a lovely grandma - smile and say nothing!!!!!

No need to offend her over a Moses basket. Find somewhere to shove it and bring it out for her visit only.

To be honest if the material was real silk it wouldn't be too bad, lovely soft natural breathable fibre (although v hard to wash even by hand). But it it's artificial silk then it's posing place only. No way could or should a new baby actually sleep in that much artificial fibre.

ShatnersBassoon · 03/03/2017 00:25

I don't think it's that bad. Dated and impractical fabrics, but not worth putting a lit match to (for God's sake, don't do that). My biggest 10lb+ baby was happy in a moses basket for months I think, by the way.

Just pull out the polyester bits that would come into direct contact with the baby and replace with cotton sheets and blankets. Nobody will see the blessed thing, but your MIL will be pleased if you use it.

HazelBite · 03/03/2017 00:40

Its not dated, it is just purely hideous. Never at any time in history would this be considered beautiful.
Covers to Moses baskets are usually cotton or polycotton because they are the the most practical and healthy.
I would imagine that if you washed those covers they would need a lot of ironing. You can remove the fabric from the hood,( I did it to one someone gave to me) get some replacement covers or ask someone to make some for you. Just always have the satin ones in the wash.

Pigeonpost · 03/03/2017 00:44

That is vile. The hood will definitely come off. Try harder!!

BoomBoomsCousin · 03/03/2017 06:22

It's hideous. It seems most agree! But if it's functional, with the benefit of experience now, I would say accept it and use it. Put whatever money you would have spent on your own choice into a college fund account for your DC. Every time you look at it and think how awful it is, think about your DC not having to slog away so hard when they're older to pay of their college loans. Or if you need something more near term, put it in an activities fund and think about your DC being able to have guitar lessons.

The first 6 months will soon be a distant memory. Don't worry about the hideous basket, the DC inside will be beautiful.

Nelllo · 03/03/2017 06:40

Ok, it's awful and you don't like it, there's no escaping that. I know we should be gracious about gifts, but honestly, I wouldn't put my baby in that with all the spare fabric - it also looks like it's synthetic. Yuk!

IMO you need to be honest with her. Calmly and gently say that it isn't to your taste and that you have concerns about safety. Just say that you wish she had asked you first, because a safe sleeping place for baby is such an important thing and you had already thought about what you wanted. You can't have her continue to spend money on things that aren't suitable or that you don't want in your house, so this will set out the expectation that she should ask you what you want before making big purchases.

QueenOfTheCatBastards · 03/03/2017 07:08

Satin is a fucking horrid fabric for child bedding.

Just ditch the covers and buy a cheap cotton liner from somewhere like Amazon or eBay.

If gift giver kicks off that's their problem not yours.

Garnethair · 03/03/2017 07:33

We had one very similar for my first baby. It was the thing in the eighties. The height of fashion. I bet your MIL is the same age as me and thinking back to when she had her babies.

ethelb · 03/03/2017 22:48

DH: "it looks like the inside of a coffin"

Patriciathestripper1 · 03/03/2017 23:02

Your poor mother in law. She's bought something lovely and thoughtful for your new arrival and all you can think about is how to get rid of it.
No wonder so many of you have such rotten relationships with your own mils when you post such fucking horrible comments like that.
Does it really matter what the covers are like?
Baby will only probably sleep in it for a few months anyway so what's the problem?

NerrSnerr · 03/03/2017 23:04

Patricia Those covers are against SIDS guidelines- I think it's fair that safety should come first.

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