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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think friends are being over-senstive?

999 replies

pomadas87 · 20/02/2017 18:51

A friend (who lives abroad) messaged me and a couple of our good mutual friends - he shared happy news of his new baby and some pics. Everyone v excited and wished him congratulations!

He then said "so who's next to have a baby - she needs a playmate!" ... me and DH are newly married and are getting the question quite a lot...! Other friend said "I'm looking at you guys" (meaning me and DH)...

I then said "not for a while I'm afraid Grin why don't you have another one straightaway and you'll have Irish Twins - instant playmate!"

Meant it in a joking way and then they all called me a racist, xenophobe etc.... I didn't realise it was offensive and now I'm feeling shitty! Did they overreact to my (stupid) joke or am I just an idiot?! Confused

OP posts:
NataliaOsipova · 20/02/2017 21:41

I attempted public spirited once when I suggested homophobic banter was maybe a bit 1980s and also that the term 'Scottish twat' was maybe a tad racist.

....to the same Head? He's running quite a school there! Grin

ILikeBeansWithKetchup · 20/02/2017 21:44

Bless him , he is somewhat 'old school' . I must emphasise that he personally did not call me a Scottish twat.

And I made him endure Stonewall training, so he got his day of educating!

Gabilan · 20/02/2017 21:48

what's the association with Irish people?

Paddy = Patrick

dowhatnow · 20/02/2017 21:52

They could have just pointed it out politely. It obviously wasn't meant in a negative way.,

bumbleymummy · 20/02/2017 21:53

Yes Gab, I know that :) I meant what was the association between having a tantrum and being Irish. Someone just explained that it's to do with drunken brawling.

Funnily, when abroad we found that it was usually the English people who were associated with drunken loutish behaviour whereas the Irish were kind of seen as friendly drunks.

Tabbylady · 20/02/2017 21:53

Goodness. My Irish DH & his family fondly refer to our DS as our Irish twins. I've genuinely never really thought about it- they're both Irish and born in the same year!

We're not religious in the slightest so perhaps the Catholic connotations are lost on him.

As an adopted weegie I'd like to point out you're all wrong- it's not a Glasgow kiss, or a Glaswegian kiss, it's a Glesga kiss [said somewhat aggressively with a big grin]

Gabilan · 20/02/2017 21:57

I meant what was the association between having a tantrum and being Irish

Various things. Street bawling, lack of control, being red-haired and fiery. Up until around 100 years ago racial science and eugenics quite seriously suggested that Irish people were a lesser and more barbaric race.

AlrightChuck · 20/02/2017 21:58

I think "having a paddy" is very offensive indeed. The suggestion is that the Irish are rough and drunken basically.

steph0488 · 20/02/2017 22:02

I'm Irish... wouldn't be in the slightest bit offended and would have realised straight away it was meant as a joke :) xx

ILikeBeansWithKetchup · 20/02/2017 22:02

Tabby, I have never actually met an actual Glaswegian who says Weegie Wink

I concur but would spell it Glesca. I anglicised for the audience....

bigearsthethird · 20/02/2017 22:03

I never realised having a paddy was to do with the Irish! I always thought it was just a saying for a strop and always pictured someone stomping round paddy rice fields in a huff. 😳

hollyisalovelyname · 20/02/2017 22:04

I'm Irish.
My Irish friend has Irish twins.
I don't have a problem with the term.
Neither does she.
Chill.

TheWinterOfOurDiscountTents · 20/02/2017 22:04

For those saying its ridiculous to call it offensive or rude....these things have particular connotations for Irish people, especially from English people. Some of us remember being in England in the 80's and 90's and having to constantly put up with "jokes" about having a bomb in our bags, or similar shite. And if you didn't smile or laugh along you were accused of being touchy, if you got cross you were throwing a paddy....

It's not a vacuum, is the point. Context is important, and on the whole, English people making comments or jokes at the expense of Irish people, or perpetuating sterotypes of the Irish, are not going to go down too well. If you can't see why, its even more reason you should be a bit more circumspect.

ILikeBeansWithKetchup · 20/02/2017 22:06

tabby - not the nicest term , always

A weegie is someone from Glasgow, Scotland. Weegies are the scum of the earth who have no jobs and don't know what a bar of soap is. they have never had a wash and are scared of water. They are all inbred and there father and mother are sister and brother. Weegies have no money and are all on the dole. they collect there giro every week to buy there smack and buckie and then occasionaly go and gloryhunt by watching either Glasgow Rangers or Celtic on a saturday but dont know anything about the team. Weegies are scum of the earth.

"Feed the weegies, let them know it's christmas time"

"You are a weegie, a smelly weegie, your only happy on giro day. Yer ma's stealer, yer dad's a dealer, so please dont take my hub caps away"

hollyisalovelyname · 20/02/2017 22:07

I agree there is racism against the Irish by some in the UK.
It's a superiority/ colonial thing.

But Irish twins - No.

Gwenhwyfar · 20/02/2017 22:11

"But if there is no definition of race so how could I possibly think someone was a different race to me let alone discriminate?"

Because the racist believes in those 'races'. You see?

" I'm just replying to the pp who said there is no definition of race which really isn''t correct. "

There is no agreed definition of race.

"I believe there are races"

That's a valid opinion, but it's not a universal belief.

"as do most of these science types who study this stuff"

Talking about race is quite out of fashion among scientists these days, they tend to say "population" or "ethnic group".
Sociologists believe race is an entirely cultural construct and generally only use the term in inverted commas.

bimbobaggins · 20/02/2017 22:14

I know someone who has Irish twins who calls them Irish twins herself.

Tabbylady · 20/02/2017 22:15

ILikeBeansWithKetchup to be fair, most of the "weegies" I meet have spent or are spending time in one or other of our HMPs - they're the only ones I've heard use the term weegie to refer to themselves....!

( Everyone else likes to point out they're actually from Bearsden/Milngavie Grin )

Anyway, I shall inform DH of his offensiveness. I doubt he'll take it well. His favourite T Shirt is a Notre Dame "Fightin Irish" one.

Re the OP's situation though, frankly I think the most offensive thing is the way people start asking newlyweds intrusive questions about their reproductive choices (with the implicit assumption that it IS a choice!)

bumbleymummy · 20/02/2017 22:16

I wonder if it is more likely to be seen as offensive coming from an English person compared to,say, a scottish person?

TheWinterOfOurDiscountTents · 20/02/2017 22:16

I know someone who has Irish twins who calls them Irish twins herself

Is she Irish though?

What a group can say about themselves is not always acceptable for people outside that group to call them. I'm sure you don't need obvious examples.

TheWinterOfOurDiscountTents · 20/02/2017 22:17

I wonder if it is more likely to be seen as offensive coming from an English person compared to,say, a scottish person?

Depends which bit of Ireland the person is from Wink

mikado1 · 20/02/2017 22:17

I don't see I as a joke or a negative, just a 'thing'. I'm Irish, hear it regularly and never heard offence taken. It simply means two children born v close together but obviously not twins, something that's common in Ireland (Yes I know why that was/is but honestly have never thought deeply about it!!)
Yanbu

OMGyoumustbekidding · 20/02/2017 22:17

I hate this race stuff within the uk it is so stupid.

The mongrel one was definately 100% racially motivated. It was dished out by someone who believes that they are "true" scottish race. Her dad is a weirdo who spends too much time researching his family tree. They beleive they are directly descended from blah blah blah... I have listened to it politely and smiled as I misunderstood and just thought how it was lovely and they were proud of their heritage. Then it moved on to how the english were not a race and therefore we're not "pure" and that the english were mongrels and that is why they are all nasty greedy bla, blah, blah...

I have to say I joke in the house now that she is my pedigree chum :)

I always loved meeting people from scotland when I lived in the home counties and never met a dodgy one except for my parents (just kidding)... Since moving to glasgow most people are lovely, but you do get dodgy ones as you do everywhere (glaswegian version of Katie Hopkins or worse?)

ILikeBeansWithKetchup · 20/02/2017 22:18

I am 'actually' from Knightswood, via Helensburgh! But lived in Glasgow proper as a child. Went to school with lots of the posh ones from Milngavie Wink

I can see those in HMP might like being Weegies!

mikado1 · 20/02/2017 22:19

My MIL had Irish triplets-3 singletons under age 2!!

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