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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU? Sisters wedding

52 replies

Lostatsea43 · 19/02/2017 08:48

My sister ran away on Friday and got married, only their best friends and their children attended the wedding. I am happy for them as I know my new BIL wanted a small wedding.

They and all my and his family live 200 hundred miles away. They have chosen to get married 20 miles away from where I live and they have sent texts of where they will be visiting over the weekend.

AIBU's to be really pissed off that she has not even invited me and my family over to have a drink and celebrate their wedding. I am her only sibling.

OP posts:
BewtySkoolDropowt · 19/02/2017 08:53

Yes, YABU. How would that appear to other family members if you were there to celebrate their wedding and they were not invited?

And 'ran away'? Unless she is 16 and heading to Gretna Green to marry without parental consent, that seems a bit inappropriate.

WrittenandGrown · 19/02/2017 08:54

When she texted you did you say congratulations and ask her if she has time to meet up?

llangennith · 19/02/2017 08:54

Why not text back congratulating them and suggesting you meet up as they're only 20 miles away?

picklemepopcorn · 19/02/2017 09:02

YANBU to hope to meet up at some point for a congratulatory drink. They can celebrate with the other family when they get back home. Might as well celebrate with you while you are near.

FourToTheFloor · 19/02/2017 09:03

Ran away Confused

Yes yabu. It's her wedding, she gets to do what she wants.

EssentialHummus · 19/02/2017 09:07

Yes YABU. Say congrats and ask if tgey have time to see you for a quick drink.

Mumzypopz · 19/02/2017 09:08

They chose this type of wedding so as she didn't have to bother with meeting up with lots of family.

Mumzypopz · 19/02/2017 09:09

You are effectively trying to meet up with her on her honeymoon. It's not all about you.

KitKat1985 · 19/02/2017 09:22

On the fence on this one. On the one hand it's her wedding and she can do it how she wants, but I think I'd probably feel hurt in your situation too.

haveacupoftea · 19/02/2017 09:27

Agree its her honeymoon, leave her to it.

Bluntness100 · 19/02/2017 09:27

I think you're being unreasonable to say she ran away . 🙄

Crispsheets · 19/02/2017 09:31

Yes YABU.
Let them enjoy doing what they want, without a disapproving sister turning up.

IWillOnlyEatBeans · 19/02/2017 09:32

I wasn't invited to my sister's wedding. Both sets of parents went and that's it. We are really close - she was bridesmaid at my wedding - but I wasn't offended by the lack of invite. I had the wedding I wanted - so did she.

SpongebobRoundPants · 19/02/2017 09:36

Unless she's 16 years old YABU. She didn't run away,

Patienceisvirtuous · 19/02/2017 09:38

Ran away 😄

Benedikte2 · 19/02/2017 09:41

My DS did the same -- we hadn't even met the groom prior . Didn't blame her as I knew our parents wouldn't have agreed. Her choice, her life (and she sadly lived to regret it) but I didn't feel hurt. If you had been the only family member excluded, then you'd have reason to feel upset.
How about suggesting that family organise a celebration for the happy couple? They may even have one planned for later in the year. Life is too short to harbour resentment

caffelatte100 · 19/02/2017 09:42

I hear you OP, I would be really upset as well!!!

wifeyhun · 19/02/2017 09:44

YABU she can do whatever she wants.

Olympiathequeen · 19/02/2017 09:45

She clearly wants to do it her way so you just have to accept that. YABU

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 19/02/2017 09:47

You sound a bit clingy. It's just a wedding.

The use of 'ran away' suggests her trying to escape your grasping arms and do her own thing.

KateDaniels2 · 19/02/2017 09:47

Yes yabu.

Mummyoflittledragon · 19/02/2017 09:48

Hard to accept but it's her wedding and her time and she gets to spend it as she wishes.

Bluntness100 · 19/02/2017 09:48

Op , instead of saying she ran away, you should have written something like

" my sister had a small private wedding on Friday, just her best friends as witnesses and their children attended, they live 200 miles away but the wedding was 20 miles away from me, and they are now spending the weekend there and has outlined her activities , am I being unreasonable to be pissed off she didn't invite me and my family over for drinks" .

Answer, yes, you can see her another time, it's not about you, it's basically her honeymoon.

ClemDanfango · 19/02/2017 09:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SomewhereNow · 19/02/2017 09:53

Well she seems to have time to see other family members over the weekend or have I read it wrong?

I'd be a bit pissed off too OP.

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