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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

'D'h on a night out by himself

131 replies

soontobemrsmckeown · 19/02/2017 02:53

'D'h went on a night out with one mate. That mate messaged me nearly 2 hours ago to say he was going home and that 'D'h was in a bad way but was refusing to go home. I cannot make contact with him and he isn't home yet. I'm very worried about his state of mind as if he was that drunk then what will he be like now. He has history of being hospitalised after a night out.

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 19/02/2017 04:50

Hope he's home safe and sound. What a worry. Sounds like a problem that seriously needs addressing

RochelleGoyle · 19/02/2017 04:55

Hope he's back home soon, OP.

Original poster
soontobemrsmckeown · 19/02/2017 05:17

He has just walked in now and said it cost him 27 quid in a taxi for a trip that costs 10. Not sure where he has been now but he is very drunk and not talking sense at all. Pointless going to sleep now. Little one will be up in 45 mins. Might as well stay awake for the rest of the day. He is sound asleep

OP posts:
GreyStars · 19/02/2017 05:22

I would be doing something very loud very shortly if I was you like packing his bags

He is an arsehole

Once you can forgive with a lot of apologising, I think very few people haven't got carried away at some point but to this extreme and regularly?

I couldn't and wouldn't live with it. Flowers for you

sobeyondthehills · 19/02/2017 05:23

I believe 8am is a reasonable time to wake up people with children

cafenoirbiscuit · 19/02/2017 05:34

Phew - so relieved for you. Afternoon nap for you I think while DH is on daddy duty hide the painkillers Grin

Scrumptiousbears · 19/02/2017 05:43

Tell the police he is back OP

Original poster
soontobemrsmckeown · 19/02/2017 05:45

We will be out the house at 8.30 for Sunday morning swimming lesson. I'm so annoyed with him. He is asleep on the sofa at the moment. Dd is awake wanting to get up and go down stairs. I've not had any sleep since I woke up at 7 this morning

OP posts:
BathshebaDarkstone · 19/02/2017 05:49

Ring hospitals first, then police stations. Flowers

BathshebaDarkstone · 19/02/2017 05:59

He's a dickhead. After swimming, he takes over all childcare duties and you go to bed. Then tonight you go out. Flowers

MagicChicken · 19/02/2017 06:11

Sometimes I really think these utter twats just need us to go arrange a night out and just not come home or answer our phones at all, all night, with no warning or explanation and just wander in at midday next day. See how they like it, worrying like fuck that we might be dead in a ditch somewhere. I am so sick of reading threads like this.

JanuaryMoods · 19/02/2017 06:49

Why do you tolerate this? You and your children deserve better.

Gallavich · 19/02/2017 07:02

What should you do? Get a divorce is my advice

blueskyinmarch · 19/02/2017 07:10

Glad he is home safe. How often does he go out and get drunk like this?

Bluetrews25 · 19/02/2017 07:10

He's teaching your DCs how to abuse alcohol and be a pretty poor example of a father and partner. Do you want them to behave like this when they are adults, or expect this behaviour (and tolerate it) from their partners in the future?
This is not just one too many on a night out. Drinking to hospitalisation level is serious, and at some point his health will suffer. Probably some years after family life is ruined. How long are you prepared to put up with this?

Jaynebxl · 19/02/2017 07:16

How often does this happen? He seriously needs to grow up and stop such stupid and dangerous behaviour. Please be really firm with him about this. And definitely hand childcare over to him this morning while you go rest / shopping / hiding out at a friend's.

DrMorbius · 19/02/2017 07:30

What should you do? Get a divorce is my advice

FFS - the bloke had a night out. He's an adult, he can come home when he wants.
OK so he had a few too many, big deal.

BTW his mate is a knob for contacting you Op.

Nquartz · 19/02/2017 07:34

If this is a regular thing I'd be really pissed off, it's not normal for adults to drink so much they need hospitalisation.

Whatasmashingpumpkin · 19/02/2017 07:40

OP this is awful and you and your children deserve better than this. I know everyone is entitled to a night out but when you're a parent and you can't control how much you drink and up in as bad a state as this a reality check is needed. Not fair on you - worry, upset and a sleepless night - and not fair on the children seeing their father passed out and stinking on alcohol and unable to contribute to what should be a family Sunday and a mum who's sad and exhausted.
You do deserve better OP.

JanuaryMoods · 19/02/2017 07:41

FFS - the bloke had a night out. He's an adult, he can come home when he wants.

Only if he's pathetic. Getting that drunk is not something grown ups do. Only idiots.

NataliaOsipova · 19/02/2017 07:47

FFS - the bloke had a night out. He's an adult, he can come home when he wants.

Of course he can. But it doesn't mean he should; part of being a grown up is having some consideration towards others and a sense of your responsibilities. He has a wife (who will be worried about him) and a child (for whom he will be responsible today).

bloodymaria · 19/02/2017 07:49

Definitely let him take charge of the DCs once you get back from swimming so you can have a nap.

Butterymuffin · 19/02/2017 07:57

So is this a regular occurrence? Wake him up and shift him off the sofa at least.

cookieswirls · 19/02/2017 07:57

Sorry to hear this op and for the poster who said he's and adult, he can come home when he wants. He's also a father and a husband who surely should have some respect for his wife who is worried sick and dc who have to see him in this state! It's not nice having to tiptoe round on your weekend because daddy's had too much too drink and needs to sleep. What a twat he's been.

DrMorbius · 19/02/2017 08:14

He's also a father and a husband who surely should have some respect for his wife who is worried sick

Classic MN response, he didn't know his DW was worried he was out. As far as he knew everything was OK. So how can any blame be attached to him? Criticali it was the OP that chose to be worried.

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