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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask what it felt like to hold your baby for the first time?

200 replies

KeplerYellow · 18/02/2017 08:20

I'm currently pregnant with my first child and wondering what it will be like when he/she is finally here. I know everyone is different, it would just be nice to hear your stories.

OP posts:

Peppapogstillonaloop · 18/02/2017 18:42

First one was born by ventouse and the doctor had put all his might into dragging her out as she was stuck..she sort of came flying out and then they slapped her straight into my chest..I distinctly remember wondering why someone had smacked me with a giant wet fish until I realised! (was bit out of it clearly!) then terror as she wasn't breathing, then relief as she did! Then sooooo tired!
Other two mostly just relief, not quite so weird!

Champagneformyrealfriends · 18/02/2017 18:43

I had a c section Andy temperature dropped quite low-I was shaking pretty violently so I refused to hold her at first. I was so scared I'd drop her. I don't remember a great deal about how I felt immediately after I had her or even the hours after (I was quite poorly and she had to be looked after by the MW's) but I know the days after I was just completely smitten. Then day 3 hot and I cried constantly for a week . There is no "normal".

Lunalovepud · 18/02/2017 19:48

Delivered by C Section as I had preeclampsia, I first saw him over the screen and then DH presented him to me when they had cleaned him up and counted his fingers and toes. It was very surreal - I couldn't believe he was mine and finally here!

I remember kissing his little cheek and feeling how soft his skin was - like silk... I could only see half of his little face because of the angle I was at compared to him. I didn't get a sudden rush of love but I think that's because it's kind of there all of the time and for me at least, grew over time when I was pregnant so when he arrived I felt more "Hello matey" rather than rush of emotion.

When we were out of recovery and on the ward, I hardly put him down! He was always asleep on my chest and I loved feeling his little body rise and fall and hearing his little gurgles... Lovely. In fact, I hardly put him down for weeks and weeks!

I am expecting DC2 at the moment and can't wait for the newborn snuggles... They really are the best. They smell so lovely - you think they will smell of womb juice and blood and gunk but they really don't - they smell delicious. Or maybe they do smell of those things but it's the hormones - who cares. Either way, get a lovely good old whiff of the top of your baby's head as often as you can in the first few weeks and months... I still smell DC1's head and he is 18 months old and usually has food in his hair.

HolaWeenie · 18/02/2017 19:53

Shocked at the size of his forehead (back to back birth cause his head into a conical shape), shocked at the colour of him, he was like blue like a ribena berry, shocked at how massive and red his testicals were, when they presented them to me after asking if I wanted to know what we had had.

onbroadway89 · 18/02/2017 19:53

My children are adopted. From the moment I first met them I knew it was right, I loved them instantaneously.

When I was present at the birth of my first grandchild (having never given birth myself, and so very grateful to my daughter for allowing me the honour of being there) I held him within a moment of his birth, and said "I have waited 50 years for you". It was like he had "come back" rather than just born. A few years on I still feel that special bond that we have been together before. I am not usually spiritual in this way at all.

NavyandWhite · 18/02/2017 19:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OrianaBanana · 18/02/2017 19:56

First one I was knackered and just relieved it was all over and he was ok. I just felt him with my hands as they'd put him on my tummy, I couldn't lift my head to look at him. I just remember he felt slippery.

I was more aware with DD, they gave her to me and I remember feeling v happy. However they immediately took me to theatre leaving her with DH, and I didn't really bond with her til later that night when I was alone with her. Then they took her away from me to neo-natal intensive care while I was bedbound in an observation ward, hardest night of my life. (She was ok in the end).

onbroadway89 · 18/02/2017 19:56

Your post has made me tearful Onbroadway, in a nice way

Thank you SO much xx

NavyandWhite · 18/02/2017 19:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Frogtits · 18/02/2017 19:59

Emergency section under anaesthetic.

He was given to me to hold, briefly, a few hours after he was born before he was returned to SCBU.

I thought he was beautiful - his little mouth, round cheeks and sleeping eyes.

However, I don't remember feeling the "rush of love" people talk about.

I loved him, but was exhausted from the lack of sleep and the terror of being in charge of this tiny being.

iwannapuppy · 18/02/2017 20:04

First thought was...oh my god I have made a person. Second thought.....please can someone take her away from me as I'm gonna throw up.

KayTee87 · 18/02/2017 20:09

Didn't get to hold him for ages and then just relieved and a bit dazed I think. Can't really remember much, I wasn't very well unfortunately.

oldlaundbooth · 18/02/2017 20:10

Relief.

Screwinthetuna · 18/02/2017 20:11

It felt absolutely brilliant; I forgot all my pain and worries and everything else in the world and felt like I could have burst with happiness

PersisFord · 18/02/2017 20:14

LuchiMangsho I've just cried reading that!!

This is my horrible confession....I've got twins and had an emergency section with them for fetal distress. They were given back to me after about a million years 10 minutes, all clean and swaddled and dressed..... and although I felt a great rush of love for DT1 for DT2 I felt horribly protective....but not like she was my baby at all. She was poorly after they were born and wouldn't BF, and I remember so clearly when the rush of love came because she was about a week old. It was awful and I had dreadful PND and I thought that she would be taken away from me. Obviously she wasn't (who'd have her?!?) and she's my moon and stars now.

DS I had an elective section and demanded to watch him being born so I could be sure he was mine. Amazing experience, he was delivered on to my chest all bloody and screaming and It was all perfect.

I love them all the same now. I don't think it matters in the long run. I still feel guilty about DT2 though and I've had a little cry just thinking about it now.

60percentofthetime · 18/02/2017 20:18

Immediately after? Relief! The 'overwhelming love' feeling didn't happen at first though, I think the hospital was so sterile, it just all felt so surreal. Bringing him home was when it hit me, I cried lots of happy tears.

Robinkitty · 18/02/2017 20:21

With ds1 I felt overwhelming love and the immense responsibility
Dc2 and 3 I felt that love straightaway and also relieved and pleased with myself very happy.

lovelyleftrubbishright · 18/02/2017 20:58

I didn't feel a rush of love or overwhelming happiness or anything, just pleased she was here and beautiful and healthy. I just felt like her being born was just another stage because we had already been together for 20ish weeks (I mean since I started to feel her move as that's like, your first interaction!) and then it was immediately onto 'okay, lets learn to breastfeed'.

Just read this to DH and he said it makes me sound cold, I bonded with her easily, I just mean that I didn't feel all floaty like a lot of people report. I was just like, okay, great, she's here, lets get some sleep then. Can I walk yet? Can I get my catheter out? Can I have a shower? Is this latch okay? When are your parents visiting? Change nappy. Feed. Right I need some food now. Can you go and get me some nipple cream? How are my stitches looking? Feed. Oh God I need a poo. Has she fed enough? Can I go home now? Right we're home. Why is she crying? Change nappy. Feed. We need some dinner. Right, we should get some sleep.

I spent most of the next day gazing at her though!

helterskelter99 · 18/02/2017 21:00

Surreal I never thought we would have a love baby so it felt like a dream
I actually really made the most of all my mat leave because I really felt it was all going to disappear
Mind you 4 years on it still feels odd

Nokia3310 · 18/02/2017 22:05

Baby no 1 he was passed to me for a moment before the midwife panicked because he realised DS couldn't breathe properly. He then got transferred to another hospital and I didn't see him for several very long hours.

Baby no 2 was passed to me and within minutes my blood pressure dropped dangerously low, massive headache started and I thought I was going to die. He was immediately taken from me.

Have since felt I've missed out on such special moments. Boys are 7 and 4 now and every cuddle since birth has felt amazing.

Thirdload · 19/02/2017 05:40

DC1 - my first thought was that I'd known his face my whole life. Not in an "overwhelming sense of love" way, but in a detached "oh my God, I already know that person!" sort of way. Not sure I can explain it any better than that. It was a traumatic birth and he was held up for a second so I could see him before being taken away. When I did hold him it was emotional but I was mainly terrified.

DC2 I felt overwhelming love. I got to hold DC2 straight away and I cried with happiness at how lucky I felt to have had a lovely birth and healthy full-term baby. She was warm and squishy and strong.

DailyMailFuckRightOff · 19/02/2017 06:08

It was marvellous. I felt like I already knew him. I sobbed 'he's beautiful' as he howled, bright red with fury at being extracted against his will. And I genuinely meant it.

BathshebaDarkstone · 19/02/2017 06:12

Completely in love, and relieved as I hadn't seen him for 4 hours.

hoopdeloop · 19/02/2017 06:27

'Thank god I can stop pushing'
I certainly didn't hear a choir nor see angels. I did however feel warm and wet as he peed all over me

Juanbablo · 19/02/2017 06:43

It's the best and weirdest feeling ever. The baby is hot and slimy and beautiful all at the same time. I was exhausted, relieved and so happy.

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