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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Inheritance AIBU

257 replies

WayfaringStranger · 16/02/2017 21:26

I am neither the mother nor the adult children but this situation is causing a shitstorm in our family. I've changed a few details to make this less identifiable. Mother has sadly been diagnosed with a terminal illness. She's in the process of sorting out her affairs. She has a few grand in savings but a property worth around £200k. She split from the children's father when they were little and they've seen neither hide nor hair of him.

There are two adult children in their late 20s. DD is married with a baby. They struggle financially, not unusual for a young couple with a child. DS is disabled (physical and mental health problems), cannot work and has never moved out of the family home.

Mother told the children of her intention to split everything down the middle. DD and her husband will be able to use her half as a deposit and get a mortgage. DS is not going to be able to afford to buy in the area. He feels he cannot move out the area because he'll lose the support from the extended family. He is terrified about moving out of the home he has lived in all his life. He worries it might make his mental health problems worse. Mother then proposed giving him lifetime tenancy. DD feels this is unfair as it ties up her inheritance. Neither sibling are particularly close but both see each other's point of view.

My gut feeling is that DS needs financial advice to ensure financial security for him. I think the house should be sold after their mother has gone. I think DD needs to agree to give her brother some time to adjust.

OP posts:
Adnerb95 · 18/02/2017 07:23

I have sent you a PM wayfaring

ArcheryAnnie · 18/02/2017 11:39

WayfaringStranger they are lucky to have you involved, and everyone sounds like they want to do the right thing. Good luck.

SuperFlyHigh · 18/02/2017 11:46

Glad you have an action plan in place OP.

girlelephant · 18/02/2017 12:16

WayfaringStranger good luck and they are lucky to have you to help

JsOtherHalf · 18/02/2017 17:27

www.mencap.org.uk/willsandtrusts

Goldmandra · 22/02/2017 20:14

OP, did you discount the possibility of shared ownership?

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