AIBU or is my boyfriend just a massive knob

[Peanutandphoenix]

I was suppose to see my boyfriend on valentines day it was our first one together and he ruined it by cancelling on me said he has no money and apparently he forgot to tell me who forgets that they've got no money all he's got me for valentines day is just a card nothing else and I've bought him a present. I was suppose to be going to his today but his mum said I couldn't go down and he has refused to come to mine because he said he would be too tired after work (he's a cleaner and works from 6am to 10am) he is coming down at the weekend because he gets money today and am still only getting a card for valentines day nothing else no chocolates no flowers nothing really feel like just cancelling the weekend and flogging him and his present on eBay. AIBU and ungrateful or is he just a massive tit that I can do without this isn't the first time he's cancelled a date but he normally says he will come down a different day to make up for it.

they will, i reckon you just needed to talk things through to see it all clearer

hollywoodstunt your right there am waiting for knob head to get in touch so that I can talk thIngs through with him but at this rate am going to have to wait until he comes down tomorrow which I didn't want.

Both of you sound so immature. Why would you pursue a relationship with someone like him? And if you're in such a committed relationship, why last month were you posting about online dating? I don't get it, do you not realise that someone's mum telling you when you can and can't see them is not normal at all? You both need to start behaving like adults

It's only been a month, it all sound very dramatic. two weeks of heavy future planning followed by two weeks of a massive back track on his part. It's run it's course

Just text him that you have other plans now for tomorrow but you would like to have a chat or just send him a text message saying this isn't working the way you thought it would and you would like to call it a day.

But just get it over and done with

Woah! No need to personally attack OP!

Not everyone's relationships are perfect like yours, something I apologise for on behalf of all of us "immature" women who pursue dickheads!

Fact is, you either click with someone you meet on that level or you don't & actually if it's quite intense at the start, you'll find you get to know that person relatively quickly.

I fell pregnant within 3 months of meeting my ex, however I will have absolutely no one judge me for it! Me & him had got to know each other in that time, we were together all the time.

I think you need to back off op & stop calling her immature! She grieving her nan, everyone makes mistakes.

two weeks of heavy future planning followed by two weeks of a massive back track on his part. It's run it's course

Sounds more like two weeks of laying it on thick to reel her in and then a switch to his now preferred arrangement, which is using her for a shag and some mothering whenever it suits him. Presumably while his wife or girlfriend is at home with no clue.

Jesus OP, you need to make choices that are in your own best interests, not go about trying to 'rescue' arseholes because you wish someone would rescue you. Take care of yourself.

Fake. Reported.

he's hung like a dead hamster

Think this is the second time I've ever startled the neighbours by inadvertently laughing like a drain at something on the Internet!

A month isn't a 'relationship'. I've got bread older than that.

Hilarious!

greystars am going to let him come down tomorrow and talk it out with him face to face because he's not been in touch tonight so there is no point sending a message to a brick wall.

karmaisabitch thank you I'm not immature I just don't have the relationship I thought I was going to get and now I want out of it there's nothing wrong with realising after a month that your with the wrong person and they will never change so why bother trying anymore when it will only lead to nothing. Thank you for your advice karma.

Nope it all sounds just ridiculous.

klaphat unfortunatly I think your right and thats what's happened here he's layed all fake stuff on thick and now his true colours are showing through. Better now than a few years down the line though.

reasonablyinyelligent you can't be that intelligent if you think this fake trust me it's not it's real and it's what's happening to me right now. I will gladly let you spend a week living my life maybe then you won't be so quick to think it's fake.

Haha lmao cherrysoup am sure the neighbours are probably wondering if your a little bit crazy.

Glad you're going to get rid.

Trouble is that when someone behaves so immaturely you end up getting sucked into that weird teenager ness world too which is definitely not a good place to be!

Walk away and try again with a few more standards if you can!

MiscellaneousAssortment thanks yeah am getting rid because I can't be dealing with his shit no more and I won't be trying again anytime soon if ever am done with useless men.

Why are you so angry with him? You barely know the guy. He hasn't 'changed'. This is who he is.

You are having a tantrum about the fact that some random guy is not behaving like the boyfriend you have in your head.

Weird.

I'm not the biggest fan of dumping by text but it's been a month including 2 weeks of him dicking around. It's barely anything. Just do it. Never have to see him again. You're just in a vulnerable place and need to get out asap. Spend the money you would spend on dating on yourself, doing things for you. Sack it off until you're in a better place.

This cannot be real.

thestoic I'm angry at the way I'm being treated by him would you be happy to be treated like shit messed around and spend valentines day on your own after someone cancelled on you or would it all make you anary too.

I didnt even get a card of my OH ..as usual i went to the effort of going all out as he never does ..i got a kiss!!.. and do u know wot it was more than enough for me it was worth every bit of effort i put in..that kiss says to me "its just another pointless over-commercialised day but heres a kiss to say thanks anyway" ..it says "thankyou" which means more than any card or bullcrap chocs.
If u back off him abit you might find he may come to u and if he doesnt then it wasnt meant to be

middleclassproblem I hate dumping by text but I think it might be the best thing to do in this situation and its the easiest way for me and yeah I will just spend the money am saving on myself. Yeah am just giving up until am in a much better place and have the energy for a new relationship. Thanks for your advice.

Jo1511 he just constantly cancels dates and has said himself that he's unreliable he couldn't even be bothered to make the effort to come and see me today never mind on valentines day so whats the point in wasting more time trying with someone who just isn't interested I'd rather not spend another month wasting time on someone who doesn't care the longer I stay with him the harder it will be to eventually leave him.

Then u dont need our help ..u know wot to do

Nrtft. Only got to hung like a dead hamster and actually snorted; I think, for the first time in my life