Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I don't have an eating disorder?

332 replies

NotAlwaysHungry · 12/02/2017 22:51

I make myself sick about 2-3 times a week. I know it's not the greatest habit and is no doubt very unhealthy but I only do it when I've eaten too much junk. My weight is fine and I'm otherwise very healthy.

My sister recently found out about it (long story!) and she was horrified. She now has it in her head that I have some sort of eating disorder and will die at any minute.

She told me I need to see a doctor but I've been doing this for nearly eight years now and considering I'm still healthy then I'm hardly going to suddenly drop down dead because of making myself sick a few times a week.

OP posts:
DorcasthePuffin · 12/02/2017 23:34

OP, your demonising of carbs is as worrying as your vomiting. I'll go back on what I said earlier: you are NOT eating normally on the other days, you are fixated on food and investing it with moral properties. Your 'good' eating is as much part of this cycle as your purging. You are swinging between over-control and loss of control.

It is really hard to say, for the first time, that you have an ED. You are clearly on the edge of this, dipping one toe in the water and kind of hoping we can coax you in, but not quite ready to leave the safety of your denial. I know. I've been there. You might not be ready to acknowledge it today, or tomorrow, but please do get help soon.

sonyaya · 12/02/2017 23:35

*Okay so I go to the GP and say "I make myself sick two to three times a week and my sister now thinks I have an eating disorder."

Then what? What will they do?*

I can only comment on what happened to me. I blurted it out and burst into floods of tears because I found it so shameful to admit to. My GP was lovely and said well done for coming, that's the biggest hurdle done, would you like some help to get better? Then she suggested a referral to Healthy Minds, which I said yes please. She referred me and I went.

Deadsouls · 12/02/2017 23:35

I can't believe that you can't see that this is not normal or healthy behaviour around food. Especially for the number of years you say this has been going on.

bobberybobble · 12/02/2017 23:35

Your Gp will be supportive and offer you a whole host of support and referrals OP.

HOWEVER they don't have a magic formula. You need to realise making your self sick is not normal.

You have an unhealthy relationship with food. Lots of people eat cheesy pasta once a week and are not obese or making themselves sick.

Your GP will refer you to get advice in why you are feeling this way. There could be a million reasons why. Your sister has every right to be worried, dont push her away. She cares about you.

please speak to your GP xx

Original poster
NotAlwaysHungry · 12/02/2017 23:36

OK I will make an appointment with GP first thing tomorrow.

OP posts:
Botanicbaby · 12/02/2017 23:37

Agree wholeheartedly with PP - carbohydrates and fat are essential for the human body, I despair that we have been conditioned into seeing them as 'bad'. Too many faddy diets about and awful alternatives.

Sorry OP, you definitely have an eating disorder. My lovely friend had the same and died from it, she made herself sick several times a week and it went on for years and years. She would never eat in front of anyone. She was a lovely person and I miss her, such a waste of a life.

Please seek help from your GP. Just tell them what you've told us. They're not going to think you are wasting their time Flowers

Original poster
NotAlwaysHungry · 12/02/2017 23:37

DP doesn't know.

OP posts:
PerspicaciaTick · 12/02/2017 23:37

Does your DP know that is what you did with his "amazing chicken korma", that you couldn't even wait until after he had cleared up before getting rid of it?

Or do you hide your behaviour from him?

Deadsouls · 12/02/2017 23:37

Good on you OP - it'll be okay. Just tell them what you said here.

Leanin15yearsmaybe · 12/02/2017 23:38

Working in GI medicine I see the internal repercussions of bulimia quite regularly, your teeth are the least of your problems believe me. Please do speak to your gp and please don't dismiss others concerns for your health when you posted here asking for advice. Posters here don't know your circs but this can mean that they can sometimes give you a more objective view. Good luck

dailymaillazyjournos · 12/02/2017 23:38

You're scaring me now! I don't want to die!

That's good. So please go see your GP.

What Cecile describes sounds seriously grim and no one deserves to go through that when there is help available.

I am on medication that messes with my potassium and sodium levels. I have to take it because I'd have had a stroke by now if i didn't. But I have to have regular blood tests to monitor these levels because they don't have to go out of kilter much to cause serious problems.

Vomiting regularly will also mess with potassium and sodium levels. Only yours aren't monitored carefully. Low sodium level will put you in a coma. And there is a not a great difference in the numbers between low but not dangerous and low and bloody dangerous.

I wish you strength to get some help. You are playing Russian roulette with your body right now and you don't have to live this way. Flowers

ohtheholidays · 12/02/2017 23:38

The fact that you can't stop and you feel panicked and start crying at the thought of stopping show's everyone that you do have an Eating Disorder!

I was actively anorexic from the age of 7-16,I wasn't overweight,I was underweight,I still have time's where I slip backwards and anorexia will never leave me sadly,it's a MH problem that will be with me forever and it was never ever about weight or how I looked it was about having some control over something,anything in my life when it all felt so out of control.

Please get some help,it could be causing all sorts of damage to your body(I know it did to mine) and believe me your teeth would be the least of your worries.

DorcasthePuffin · 12/02/2017 23:39

Well done OP. Come back and tell us how you get on. Life is so much better is you are not controlled by food.

Flowers
Leanin15yearsmaybe · 12/02/2017 23:39

Apologies, just read your updates. Well done, hope everything goes well

PerspicaciaTick · 12/02/2017 23:39

Sorry x-post.
Deciding to make a GP appointment is very brave, I wish you the strength to follow it through and to speak as honestly to your GP as you have spoken to us tonight.

ShowMePotatoSalad · 12/02/2017 23:40

Please can we refrain from saying things that have the potential to make the OP feel very ashamed? Shame perptuates eating disorders and what we need to do is be supportive, and try to understand that it's not always easy to see a problem when we're immersed in it. It's a complex issue - it's not something OP can simply snap out of or be shamed out of.

You can get your point across while still showing kindness and respect.

MsStricty · 12/02/2017 23:40

You have an eating disorder.

A close family member with an ED was admitted to rehab for 6 weeks and was very ill - including and probably most especially psychologically - when she was admitted.

So while your physical symptoms may not have manifested yet, your psychological ones are all-too apparent.

Denial being the first.

MsStricty · 12/02/2017 23:41

Good on you, OP, now I've seen your update. That's a courageous first step. All the best.

Flowers
Bluebellevergreen · 12/02/2017 23:42

OP I am torn between thinking you are making this up and being very worried.
You said you are not making it up so I will go with the second.

I was bulimic for a few years. I was in my teens and I was thin. It isnt always a weight thing but a control thing or other reasons.

Even then, as a teenager I knew it was not normal.

You said that once you tried not to throw up and felt awful and tearful. This would be me every time, I dont want to eat the junk but I do then I try not to vomit but the calories then I would be sick and start again in a couple of days.

You have an eating disorder. It is very surprising that you dont think you have it. Because usually bulimics vomit and eat in secret. You have kept this from your sis for years so i take it you make ypurself sick in secret hence you must know it is not normal.

Now, it is normal to deny the disorder but in an anonymous forum You would be open an admit.

You think it is normal because you have done it for years

No. People dont do that. You can have a treat and we all feel a but guilty about it but making yourself sick is not what people do.

Yes, you go to GP and say exactly that.

It is not just your teeth (my enamel is fucked up now) it is also the acids on your esophagus thay can cause pretty nasty illnesses in the future, including throat cancer.

I dont want to scare you but that helped me, being informed

Original poster
NotAlwaysHungry · 12/02/2017 23:44

Making what up? I'm not trying to be annoying.

OP posts:
CeciledeVolanges · 12/02/2017 23:44

Well done OP.

dailymaillazyjournos · 12/02/2017 23:44

So glad you are going to make a GP appointment tomorrow. There's no quick fix but the really important thing to hold on to is that you realise it is disordered eating, that it isn't normal and that you want to start to change your attitude to food. Good luck and good on you for taking on board the responses you've had.

nocoolnamesleft · 12/02/2017 23:44

Please do make that appointment. If you are wavering about whether to...ask yourself if it's so normal, why do you hide it from your DH? It's because, on some level, you know that it is neither normal nor healthy. Good luck with your appointment.

Bluebellevergreen · 12/02/2017 23:46

You have taken a massive step coming here and booking GP.
Well done OP.
Things can only get better now Flowers

From my experience, it was a hard journey to overcome my disorder, and unfortunately I walked it alone as my parents would have shamed me and not help.

So if you can, I suggest you get DP on board as it will be easier that way.

I have been disorder free from 18 years now and never looked back.

Good luck

morningconstitutional2017 · 12/02/2017 23:46

It is neither normal nor healthy to make yourself sick 2-3 times a week whatever your weight.

Your teeth may be in good nick now but they won't stay that way if this behaviour continues.

You have an eating disorder you may not want help but you need help.