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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask you to help me argue with an anti-vaxxer on fb

854 replies

GoesDownLikeACupOfColdSick · 11/02/2017 21:24

I know, I know. But it's Saturday night, DP is out and I am just home whilst our (fully vaccinated!) DD is asleep.

What do I say to someone who is convinced that we should all do our own research, that vaccines are only about big pharma making big bucks, and that the govt hushes up vaccine damage??

OP posts:
PandasRock · 14/02/2017 17:08

Oh, and I'm forgetting the nurse who gave dd1 a vaccine without my consent, because she was annoyed that I wanted to read the patient information leaflet (without it, I was not able to give informed consent).

I asked for it, she refused, I asked again, she refused (saying I wouldn't understand it - hmm, seems there's a theme running), I said couldn't give consent without it, and she went ahead and did it anyway.

So many reasons to trust healthcare practitioners, in just one family!

BorrowedHeart · 14/02/2017 17:09

I'm assuming you meant me when you typed Broken? I've learnt a lot over the last two years, I've had to, and I've surprised people by diagnosing them and being correct when they have gone to the doctors, I'm not stupid I understand how to interpret the research I find etc, and honestly, I'm better at some things than the nurses I know, I was always giving off when they did things wrong and when my daughter couldn't breathe because of one of them and their stupidity, but yes you're right, I don't know anything.

raindripsonruses · 14/02/2017 17:09

I am immunocompromised. I never had measles as a child. There is no herd immunity in my area because of the so-called personal choices made by idiots in my area. Thanks for making a choice for me. I'd like to make the personal choice of a five star hotel in the Maldives - wanna sort that for me too, seeing as how you are making all my choices for me.

Original poster
GoesDownLikeACupOfColdSick · 14/02/2017 17:11

I'd say, YOU should definitely agree with her, because you clearly haven't understood many posts on the previous thread, so your ability to question doctors and understand research looks pretty bleak!

For the millionth time: Research is great if you know what you are doing. If you don't, then you think you're clever - but you're not. At best you are relying on herd immunity and encouraging others to go off and think they are also qualified to do it.

Would you drive a truck without a licence? Would you offer to make a wedding cake without experience? Would you represent a friend in court if you weren't a barrister? Would you stand on stage and sing opera if you couldn't sing? Would you perform an operation if you weren't a surgeon? people study immunology for years - so why do you think that you are better equipped to understand it?!

OP posts:
BorrowedHeart · 14/02/2017 17:11

That's awful to read pandas I really hope you ripped her a new one.

MimiTheWonderGoat · 14/02/2017 17:12

Where do you live raindripsonruses , if you don't mind me asking? Wales by any chance?

BorrowedHeart · 14/02/2017 17:13

I've had to do nursing and doctor jobs on my daughter, yet I don't have a license. I'm very fucking good at what I do though, in fact it's what makes me want to be a nurse, as a lot of things I can be trained quickly on.

Original poster
GoesDownLikeACupOfColdSick · 14/02/2017 17:15

well, when you've trained as a nurse and specialised in immunology, then you'll be one of the experts people can consult, and good for you.

Until then, it's just meaningless words on the internet, sorry to burst your bubble!

OP posts:
PandasRock · 14/02/2017 17:17

Borrowed, I think I can safely say she knew exactly what I thought of her and what she had done Grin

MimiTheWonderGoat · 14/02/2017 17:23

I haven't understood many posts? How so?!

Would you let someone operate on your child without asking any questions about why or possible risks etc? Really?

Would I drive a truck without a licence? No!
Would I allow my child to be injected with something I know nothing about? No!

raindripsonruses · 14/02/2017 17:23

Mimi, I live in NW England.

CoteDAzur · 14/02/2017 17:24

"if you trained as a nurse, THEN your opinions would be a lot more interesting, that would be a brilliant job."

A nurse Grin Because, as everyone knows, nurses are doctors, researchers, scientists and they know all there is to know about pharmacology.

OP - Some of us have been doing these vaccination threads for over a decade on MN and you take the Biscuit as the least informed and most offensive contributor (and I use the term loosely) I have ever come across.

But it's good to hear that if only I were a nurse you would be respectful and civil Hmm

CoteDAzur · 14/02/2017 17:28

"Research is great if you know what you are doing. If you don't, then you think you're clever - but you're not."

I totally believe you when you say that you don't understand anything when you read a scientific study. Don't assume everyone else has the same limitations.

MimiTheWonderGoat · 14/02/2017 17:29

GoesDown , you are making me want to be an ant vaxxer! All I care about is informed choice. You seem intent on trusting third parties whose interests are not in YOUR child. That's fine if that makes you happy, but why be so rude to people who choose to do research and ask questions? It's every parent's right!

CoteDAzur · 14/02/2017 17:31

Let's try another approach:

OP - Why do you think MMR is an optional vaccine?

Devilishpyjamas · 14/02/2017 17:31

Pandas - I had a locum GP say to me 'autism - terrible condition. Terrible. Girls don't get it you know'

I did this Shock and this Hmm

Original poster
GoesDownLikeACupOfColdSick · 14/02/2017 17:32

Ah Cote, so good of you to share your biscuity crown, but really I'm not worthy. Really.

As for thinking you understand all of science with your one masters though.... That must be one broad discipline!

As for being a nurse - yep. She would have more idea what she's talking about than she does NOW. And probably some different views on google queens like you :)

OP posts:
PandasRock · 14/02/2017 17:34

I should take my lot along to see (?) him - 3 girls all on the spectrum, 2 boys, one dyspraxic, one ASD (but far less affected than his sisters).

Yep, doesn't occur in girls at all...

Original poster
GoesDownLikeACupOfColdSick · 14/02/2017 17:34

Why is MMR optional? Hmmm. Is the answer "because I had mumps as a child and it was nothing, so everyone should have mumps as a child"?

Oh. You do surprise me.

OP posts:
Devilishpyjamas · 14/02/2017 17:35

no offence, but given that an extremely respected neurologist told me he didn't know the answer to my questions I wouldn't be asking a nurse.

Nothing against nurses but they're not generally world class immunologists or neurologists.

Original poster
GoesDownLikeACupOfColdSick · 14/02/2017 17:37

"Informed choice" - but informed by who? Your sources and your skills for interpreting those sources are...?

OP posts:
CoteDAzur · 14/02/2017 17:37

Can you try to be serious for a minute?

Why is MMR optional while many other vaccines are not?

And

What does the word "optional" mean? Do you think it has something to with the possibility of choice?

Original poster
GoesDownLikeACupOfColdSick · 14/02/2017 17:37

Oh no I agree. But I'd have a lot more time for a nurse's view than a googler!

OP posts:
MimiTheWonderGoat · 14/02/2017 17:40

Well, my degree in statistics, 20 years working in data analysis and statistical research for a start. I've already listed my sources!

MimiTheWonderGoat · 14/02/2017 17:43

My skills for interpreting text and spoken voice are my ability to read and my hearing, which are thankfully up to scratch.