Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this parent is really grabby?

320 replies

MintLeafTea · 10/02/2017 11:53

NC (is that you UCM) red rug/Titania/clay of cock.

My ds go to a local scout group. They run loads of events. Another parent used to go in and help out and she'd take photos for the newsletters and social media. She also used to e mail us digital photos.

She still helps out but in the newsletter there is a link and she is now selling all her photos.

AIBU to think she's only doing this to boost her business and I should tell her I want my children exempt from having their photos taken unless I can have copies (in lieu of modelling fees)

OP posts:
PoorYorick · 10/02/2017 13:54

I see not point in contributing any more to this thread. I will simply withdraw and hope other parents see sense.

Oh, you'll be refreshing the page obsessively!

Eliza9917 · 10/02/2017 13:54

*Although, I also don't think people should work for free

budgiegirl · 10/02/2017 13:55

She should be donating the proceeds to the scouts

She's already giving her time by helping at events, and also taking (and giving) photos for the scouts free of charge. It's then entirely up to her if she decides to donate any further proceeds to the scouts. The OP is just cross because the photographer is not longer donating her photos to the parents free of charge.

TinselTwins · 10/02/2017 13:56

She uploads the photos to her website then that's it waits for the £££ to come rolling in.

Well wouldn't we all be professional photographers if that's all that was in it?
It's not its a very time consuming process of selecting and editing. The software costs money, the website maintenance takes time and/or money etc..

You sound like the type of person who would only pay a professional baker the cost of eggs, flour, butter and sugar TBH

BoomBoomsCousin · 10/02/2017 14:03

I think YABU in the way you describe the photographer's motivation. It sounds like she's done a lot of photography, invested in equipment and developed expertise. She's now trying to turn that into a business. I don't think that's grabby.

However, I would not be happy about a scout troop giving access to my kids to a professional photographer who is going to sell those photos on. I don't think that commercialization of the volunteer role she held is appropriate for scouts - even though I appreciate she's done a lot for the troop and probably continues to do so.

I would thank the photographer for previous photos but tell the troop you're uncomfortable with having images of your DCs sold and withdraw photography permission.

onestepforwardtenstepsback · 10/02/2017 14:04

I can only see one grabby person op and that's you

SalmonFajitas · 10/02/2017 14:05

She should be donating the proceeds to the scouts Wow no good deed goes unpunished does it? You donate free professional photos to the scouts? Well actually you should be donating free professional photos to all the parents too!

Excited101 · 10/02/2017 14:05

Disgusting attitude op, I'm assuming you've not actually tried any photography yourself?

You're worse than grabby, you're entitled. If your children are professional models then I see your point, if not then you have no leg to stand on.

wettunwindee · 10/02/2017 14:14

I do NOT expect my dc to be excluded from any activities as a result.

And what will you do if they are OP?

MuseumOfCurry · 10/02/2017 14:23

I don't really see the problem with this arrangement. The money she charges is presumably to compensate for her time - if you don't want to pay, then go along to the Scouts meetings and take pictures of your children yourself?

Kiroro · 10/02/2017 14:29

Why don't people value photography? You want her photos, you can pay for them. Or take your own.

Kiroro · 10/02/2017 14:31

onestepforwardtenstepsback I totally agree with you.

OP you are being so grabby it is untrue. Do you honestly believe YOU are in the right here? This is a little bit down the rabbit hole.

MuseumOfCurry · 10/02/2017 14:33

She should be donating the proceeds to the scouts

Kindly provide an account of your own charitable donations ASAP, please.

arethereanyleftatall · 10/02/2017 14:34

I'd just give up people. People like the op, who are thankfully in the minority, are just so utterly self absorbed they are never going to get it. I think it's how they be been brought up, and are oblivious to it.

MidniteScribbler · 10/02/2017 14:50

I am always grateful when a good photographer gets a photo of my dogs or my son. Quality photography is art and the amount of work and money photographers put in is huge. The cost of a photo is a small price to pay for an amazing picture that captures a special moment.

MuseumOfCurry · 10/02/2017 14:56

I am always grateful when a good photographer gets a photo of my dogs or my son. Quality photography is art and the amount of work and money photographers put in is huge. The cost of a photo is a small price to pay for an amazing picture that captures a special moment.

Yes. I have a photo of my son scoring a try that he has framed and put on his bedside table. Love it.

GingersNut · 10/02/2017 15:10

Scout leader here (well, Beavers). I can see why you have a problem with this, and it sits uncomfortably with me too. If you've signed permission for photos to be taken to be used in media and publicity, there's not much you can do other than talk to the scout leaders and revoke your permission, and ask her to remove any photos of your children she's put publicly on her website.

From a scout leader point of view, if she is attending scouts in order to take photos of children to sell, another photo consent form should really be sent to parents from leaders because the service she's proving is different to taking photos for publicity and media as you've originally consented to.

If she's attending scouts as a scout leader and not just as a photographer, really i don't think she should then be selling photos of the scouts to financially benefit her. I am aware of the time and labor costs of taking professional photos (i take event photos for guide and scout publicity) but as a volunteer to the scout association, she shouldn't be using her role of scout leader to financially benefit herself. None of us are payed for the time we spend on scouting in or out of the meeting time, so why should she?

Ultimately, removing your photo permissions and asking her to remove photos of your children from being publicly viewed won't stop her from continuing to take and sell photos of other children, unless you speak to the Scout Leader, GSL and/or District commissioner.

AuntNancy · 10/02/2017 15:16

Bit off topic but I've wasted spent literally years on MN under various usernames and I have absolutely no idea what 'red rug/Titania/clay of cock' is all about.

QueenArseClangers · 10/02/2017 15:19

Obviously the OP know fuck all about professional photography.

I'll have to tell my DH that his 25+ years of earning a living as a photographer (press and freelance) has been a waste as all one has to do is 'point and click' Hmm

Scaredycat3000 · 10/02/2017 15:21

It's very sad that such an overwhelming majority think volunteering is an opportunity to line your own pockets from a captive audience. I thought it was to offer your time for free, help enrich lives, use your skills and time for the organization, not see it as an opportunity to charge the recipients for a top notch service (presumably the photographer has some talent, anybody can start!) supplied by your company. Whilst it sounds like the photographer didn't volunteer to promote her business it has ended this way. She should have either stopped taking photos, limited it to a few group/activity shots that she was happy to process for free/minimal donation to the group, set up a school photographer style sessions for special nights at the end. She should not be profiting directly from something she is doing during her volunteer time and can only do because she is volunteering. I would be very surprised is the Scouts were happy with this.

Bluebellevergreen · 10/02/2017 15:27

scaredy people dont just volunteer to save the world. There are many reasons why.
She has volunteered her services for a while. She doesnt want to do it anymore

Read the whole thread please

Kiroro · 10/02/2017 15:28

She should not be profiting directly from something she is doing during her volunteer time and can only do because she is volunteering

So she stops. Scout group loose their free marketing photos. Parents loose the opportunity to purchase nice photos of their children. Bad feeling all round. Except incredibly petty people who have put a stop to some perceived badness. Go you.

Scaredycat3000 · 10/02/2017 15:28

This really is the commercialisation of everything. So very sad. Not everything is a money making opportunity.

Scaredycat3000 · 10/02/2017 15:29

I have RTFT, it makes me very sad that people are so money grabbing.

GinIsIn · 10/02/2017 15:30

RTFT scaredy - she DOES volunteer her services to scouts for free. They get all photos free of charge and the photographer's time. If parents wish to purchase extra copies there is a charge, which is reasonable.

Swipe left for the next trending thread