being called mum by nurses in hospital

[thecatsarecrazy]

I know its only a small thing and its probably because I've been here to long but the nurses calling me "mum" I'm not your mum, would it be so hard to learn my name? Has this annoyed anyone else?

My daughter has spent months in hospital. I really dislike being referred to as 'Mum' as if it is my name. I know a lot of parents whose kids have the same condition as my daughter and one got so upset by this that I sent her a t-shirt to wear with her name on :-)

Being 'Mum' when you barely see anyone else but hospital staff really adds to feelings of isolation.

PS: Yes, I am very grateful for the brilliant care given to my daughter.

Ugh. I would absolutely hate that. Talk about twee!

I'm in hospital with my child. I actually prefer being called Mum. It's not me who has the temporary relationship with the staff. Despite being introduced by name to the nurses I rarely remember their names, so I would never expect them to remember mine. Same goes for consultants we've been seeing for many years. I'll address them by their name but I'm fine with mum in that situation too.

Thecatsarecrazy, you are 12 days post birth, your newborn is back in hospital and you are missing your other children - you are allowed to be entirely unreasonable about everything! Sending unmumsnetty hugs.

Tristan is adorable and has fabulous hair. Congratulations and very best wishes to you both.

Thank you. I'm feeling pretty miserable still. Son had a procedure done yesterday we hoped would help but it doesn't seem to have. Now they want to do heart testing and chest x ray. I know I have to be strong for him but I cant stand it.

cats really sorry to hear Tristan is not on the mend. Really is the most horrible experience to powerless to help dc, have you got support from family and friends?

Really hope your ds improves soon

What procedure was this? Has he had an endoscopy yet? DD had breathing difficulties when she was tiny and an endoscopy gave the answers and meant that she received the right treatment. If he hasn't had one I would insist that he does.

DD had chest X-rays and other tests that were clear, but it was the endoscopy that diagnosed the problem.

Poor nurses doing their best to give the best care they can.....give them a break.

Oh poor you and Tristan. That's so tough on the whole family. Have they given you any clue? Is he oxygen dependent? Is he feeding? Really feel for you.

Sorry Just Speak I have had a lot of experience of this and know exactly how thecats is feeling.

for you and best wishes to Tristan.

When I was in hospital after a late miscarrige, someone who was talking to me (don't think it was a nurse, but maybe a counsellor or someone) asked how 'my beloved' was? I didn't have a clue who she was talking about. Obviously, she was trying to avoid husband/boyfriend/partner/sperm donor/etc, but it was the most ridiculous twee term, and made me take everything else she said much less seriously.

justspeak did you even bother to read the thread or did you just jump to the end to post that bit of nonsense?
Its nonsense because you don't know that the nurses are 'doing their best'. One would hope so but how the hell would you know? Using Nurses Are Angels to shut the mother of a sick child up is far worse than a worried mother having a mild moan IMO.

Must admit I have a class of 22 nursery children and don't know any of the parents' names. I say mum/dad or Rosie's dad.

Oh, cats, I'm so sorry things haven't improved. I really hope you get some answers soon.

Sending hugs. Tristan is just gorgeous!! Try to rest. I have a very wheezy toddler tonight. It's scary sometimes

I remember being called "mum" when my children were at nursery and whilst I found it quite funny, it is a bit lazy. When my children are at school they usually call me "mrs ....." Despite the fact that I have a different surname to my children I do think that is more appropriate than "mum".

I used to be called mummy by my Childs teacher!!

I don't mind at all when it's a conversation about me ('Mum gave Jimmy his inhaler at 2am' - although why it can't be 'Jimmy's Mum gave him his inhaler' I don't know) or if it's to the child ('Jimmy, can you give this to Mum" but when it's done just for the sake of it it gives me the rage. 'How is Mum?' instead of 'How are you' or 'If Mum could sit there' instead of 'If you could sit there'. Its just so annoying and pointless.

celtic just basing on my time at hospital with my youngest, it was a children's heart ward and specifically ICU, before that it was p. Intensive care, and before that neonates. Always so busy and emergencies, a lot of them with my child, then the heart ward something was always going off and nurses running. My opinion is based on what I've seen, and I think there is too much going on to worry about names unless in a meeting away from the ward.

Oh I'm so sorry things haven't improved, I hope you get some answers soon. Can your other kids visit? You must be in need of wee people cuddles.

midcentury, you have summed it up exactly. It's used so much where usually you wouldn't need a name at all. It just sounds like putting you in your place.

How's Tristan now? Hope he's on the mend.

Just wanted to post an update about Tristan. We were finally allowed home after 4 weeks in hospital. The diagnosis they went with was a mild case of laryngomalacia. They did a small op on him, spent a few more days in Bristol hospital before being sent to local hospital, then he got worse sent back to Bristol and was in picu for a couple of days. He put on very little weight while in hospital they let us go home because we would be having the nurse and h.v visit and since being home his weight gain has been great.

What brilliant news, and what a smiley boy!

Fwiw, they don't need to call you anything. I also got a bit annoyed by it when my ds was in hospital.