They still climb into bed in the morning (yes, partners and friends sometimes do likewise), still help themselves to our bathroom and assume we can get ready around them.
Crumbs, Your adult children are in their 20s, in relationships, and they still climb into your bed, with their partners or friends in tow? You have multiple bathrooms yet your adult children still use your bathroom when you and your husband are using it?
Our family isn't particularly big on privacy in terms of bodies and all are comfortable with being naked in front of us/siblings.
It’s not just privacy your family is easy with, it’s boundaries too. I don’t view my 25 year old daughter and her 27 year boyfriend getting into bed with me and my husband in the morning, then hanging around while we shower and dress, as some kind of show of how comfortable we all are with each other’s nakedness. No, I view it as weird and a total lack of healthy boundaries.
Absolutely, I would argue though, as an only, that at least if my kids want to ignore their sibling(s) at any point that option is available to them. I can't decide to just get myself a brother/sister though.
HaveCourage. I disagree. I was one of six, my best childhood friend was an only child. She loved coming to my house, I loved going to hers. I think it is normal to want and miss what you don’t have. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. Now as adults though we both agree she had it easier. I simply couldn’t ignore my siblings. There was no space there to do that. The same goes for them ignoring me, they couldn’t. 8 people, 1 livingroom, 1 kitchen, 3 bedrooms, 1 bathroom. There is no option to ignore siblings. It is a total impossibility. It’s 24-7, 365 days a year hectic. Her parents however went out of their way to provide company for her as much as they possibly could. She had many cousins who were always over at her house. She had myself and a few other friends who loved her house and parents and were there often. She was always welcome at ours. She was always welcome at her aunts and uncles. She was always in and out playing and having dinner and sleeping over with neighbours kids. I am not saying either of our situations were the ideal situation either of us would have chosen. No. I think both of us would have chosen 1 or 2 siblings each. But ask her now would she rather have grown up in my overcrowded 6 child home or in your very quiet 1 child home and she will readily admit that she’d stick with her lot.
As an adult I can easily surround myself with friends and family and have a busy home and social life IF I choose. I could have guests over to stay as often as I choose. I could make my home a social hub that was buzzing with activity. But I couldn’t cram 8 people permanently into my 3 bedroom home and ever expect to get any privacy for any of us. I can create a social life, I can create lots of things to do with lots of people. I cannot create space.
Your “my kids can just ignore their siblings” only really works if they have an own bedroom each and sharing bathroom with no more than 2 or 3 people. Even then, depending on how many children you have, your time and energy is so divided that when they are being deprived of parental time and attention, ignoring their siblings doesn’t really solve anything. They could have 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms each, but if mum and dad are too busy and knackered all the time, well space doesn’t compensate everything. As time and energy (like space) can’t be created.