AIBU to think double barrel surnames all sound stupid and there's just no need for it?

[ExpectoPatronummmm]

I realise I will offend all you double barrellers
But why?
Do you realise it's a mouthful and makes you look like you're trying to be some kind of lord or lady?
What's wrong with one surname?
When I marry my OH i'lol take his surname. I won't just add it to mine and cause an unnecessarly long name to have to say/write/spell.

I think they make you look like a pleb.

Not sure what kind of schools they work in but every child with a double barrelled surname that I know has married (and very highly educated) parents. The unmarried ones all tend to give the child the father's name.

Very true. Every last unmarried mother I know gives the child(ren) the father's name. Never known why. All the double barrelled ones are from middle class families with professional parents.

I probably judge women more that take their husbands name on marraige I just don't understand why anyone would. people giving their children the dads surname when they aren't even married I can't even get my head around. I just assume they have they have low self worth or don't believe in equality.

What would you rather, kids take only the mother's name? Is that fair on the father? Equality has to work both ways. Families should be able to do what they want without judgement from others.

Those of you spewing intolerance towards women that do take their husband's name are being as jugdemental and unpleasant as the OP. Personally - I don't know how anyone can get so worked up over what is essentially just a word.

It doesn't have the same upper class connotations it used to have, double barrel surnames. Perhaps because it's so much more commonplace nowadays.

OP didn't mention hyphenated first names, others did

I have a double barrelled first and second name . Surname is through marriage and not choice (DH's surname not a joining of his and mine). I bloody hate it, think it sounds pretentious and hate it for other reasons I cannot say here as it would out me. Our DD's have DH's surname but I tend to use my maiden name because of the stupidity of the surname.

Should add I love my first name though!

Not sure what kind of schools they work in but every child with a double barrelled surname that I know has married (and very highly educated) parents. The unmarried ones all tend to give the child the father's name.

Very true. Every last unmarried mother I know gives the child(ren) the father's name. Never known why. All the double barrelled ones are from middle class families with professional parents.

Ah anecdata.. Can't beat it. I've found the opposite to be true actually. What judgy little posts about unmarried mothers. Hyacinth Bucket posted the first Very faux

A Journo?
No thick as mince
M'lady

Like Fenella I was delighted to get rid of my maiden name when I got married - I have no association with my unpleasant father, plus the rest of my family had a different surname. I do resent when I see threads on here that criticise me for doing so but I also understand it. Im a feminist but I'm not going to claim it was a feminist decision, more a personal one which I am happy to stand by. I'm delighted when my friends keep their names or do something non-traditional though.

Of course most surnames come down a patriarchal line and that's a reasonable point to make. I'm not sure if it's true that sons don't get asked about this as it is an assumption (often correct) that they want to carry on the 'family' (i.e. paternal) name. I don't agree that saying this negates the point that most women carry a man's surname as this is exactly the sort of thing we want to acknowledge and change.

Perhaps the only feminist decision is to come up with a new family name and I know a few people who have done this. If I were getting married now I might have done too.

Two people I know, have selected new surnames entirely, both from their family history. So they both change their surnames. We did something fairly similar. Another couple used a version of the same surname, only addding a letter

Never changed my name on marriage.
My kids have dh's surname only so I have a different surname from my kids.
I am not bothered in the slightest by this. They still call me Mammy.
I am also not bothered if other people double-barrell or triple-barrell if that's what they want to do.

Lol at the double barrel names being unmarried couples. In my circle virtually all of the professional married women have kept their own name on marriage and given the children both.

Its the done thing in these parts.

I so pity those that struggle to understand what happens down the line when the children marry. It must be difficult going through life with no understanding of the concept of personal choice.

fenella you'll see that I said I judge those who give up their name without a second thought. I don't judge something done after consideration. I don't agree though that my name isn't my own just because it came from my father. Had I been given my mother's (maiden)name it would be just as much my name.

I have a post graduate degree, I choose to take my husband's last name because I wanted to. Fuck off with all nonsense about db last names as pointing to more educated parents. You sound as cunty as as the op.

reuset perhaps it depends on different parts of the country. I can only really speak for Surrey.

The whole of Surrey

I don't know who you are. Were you the Hyacinth Bucket poster talking about unmarried mothers?

Bless you!

Ah anecdata.. Can't beat it. I've found the opposite to be true actually. What judgy little posts about unmarried mothers. Hyacinth Bucket posted the first wink Very faux

Just posting facts. Virtually every unmarried mother I know gives the kids the father's surname, and in some families I know (where there are 4+ children,) there are often 3 or 4 surnames. And it IS primarily the middle classes who have double barrelled surnames.

Sorry if I hit a raw nerve.

You shouldn't be posting here if you're so precious. That goes to the others getting all sniffy about what I said too.

How many families do you know who fit the criteria user and stop being so bleddy rude

Just posting facts

Tuts and pats user's head. No. They're just anecdotal evidence, user

Sorry if I hit a raw nerve.

Sorry (actually I'm not) to disappoint. Very faux posts though, I saw right through them

I used to work in a very working class school and I have to agree with user I'm afraid. My own dm did it which was a reason I was determined my dd would have mine. Equally when I worked in middle class school double barrelled kids were of professionals often where parents HAD married but mum kept name for professional reasons. I'm offering no judgement just my past experience.

I'm still laughing at 'I speak for Surrey'

I had every intention of giving DD then-DP's surname, because I intended to take it on marriage too. Last minute on the drive to the registry office I said "can we double barrel her surname instead?", so that's what we did.

We got married in December and decided to both double barrel our surnames to match hers, instead of taking one or the other. So it worked out nicely in the end, I like our surnames together :) and neither of us really wanted to lose our surname.

Ragwort No. Been here about 9 years but with different names. Didn't realise I had a predecessor!