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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask how much child maintenance

122 replies

Toodlepip16 · 26/01/2017 22:11

How much child maintenance do you/your DP pay to your ex or receive from ex, and what are the circumstances behind it? ie approx salary of person paying the maintenance and number of days child is with them. Do they take them on annual holiday too?

OP posts:
SusanDelfino · 26/01/2017 22:13

Ex earns 40k and I get £350/month for 2 children. He has them 2 nights a week and a bit more in the holidays.

Toodlepip16 · 26/01/2017 22:17

Thanks Susan. Does he take them on annual holidays?

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RochelleGoyle · 26/01/2017 22:20

My partner earns approx £30k and pays about £230 p/m in CS for his son. His son's mother will not let him stay with us at all and we are not allowed to include him in holidays.

SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower · 26/01/2017 22:21

Susan that seems very low. Are there other children?

Assuming no children live with him, he should be paying you over £500 a month.

I don't know what my ex earns anymore, but he pays around £850 a month.

Toodlepip16 · 26/01/2017 22:23

It could depend on location though Sheraaargh x

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Snowflake65 · 26/01/2017 22:23

I was told 15% of take home for one child, 20% for two, 25% for three or more, not sure how accurate that is.

XH pays more than the going rate.

ilovewelshrarebit123 · 26/01/2017 22:24

I get £410 for one child, he sees her once a month, he does live 300 miles away and would see her much more if he was nearer.

He does take her on holiday and has her during school holidays.

SusanDelfino · 26/01/2017 22:26

No other children involved. He is taking them abroad this year to visit family. The 40k is before tax but maintenance is now calculated after tax and pension contributions so the £350 is correct I'm afraid.

Toodlepip16 · 26/01/2017 22:26

My DP pays £300, earns £50k, pays for DSC phone contract and hobby. Stays with us minimum of twice a weeks and comes on annual holidays with us. We have a DC too.
Was just interested to see whether this was around average x

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ScottishInSwitzerland · 26/01/2017 22:28

£300 per month sounds really low to me?

Toodlepip16 · 26/01/2017 22:28

That's really sad Rochelle. Good dad's get such a crap deal sometimes x

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RochelleGoyle · 26/01/2017 22:30

I know Toodle. We could go down the court route but my partner's a softie and his ex has previously threatened to stop all contact. We hope things will improve as his son gets older.

Toodlepip16 · 26/01/2017 22:31

Considering the ExP also has two incomes in the household, didn't take DSC on holiday last year (we did), and we also contribute with childcare arrangements, I think it's fair Scottish.
We are in the North West for what it's worth

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Toodlepip16 · 26/01/2017 22:32

His son will probably end up resenting his mum Rochelle!

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intheairthatnightfernando · 26/01/2017 22:33

ExH earns about £33k, pays £500 pcm and has kids 2 nights per week.

phoenixrisingeversoslowly · 26/01/2017 22:33

£100/month
It used to be £350/month but he cut it down saying he was on a lower salary
I checked with the child support people and I wouldn't get any more going through them as he has at least 5 children in total (3 from his first marriage, mine, then the one from his current relationship)

He has never met DD, though I spent a couple of years at first encouraging that

So.. less than £25 a week and I cover everything else - way beyond money

SusanDelfino · 26/01/2017 22:34

He also pays for the activity DC1 does on one of his days. And ex spends a lot of money on commuting to work so he can stay living locally to facilitate easier access. I appreciate that so don't moan about the money but I do think UK child maintenance is very low.

needsahalo · 26/01/2017 22:34

Considering the ExP also has two incomes in the household

Your expectation is that a new partner pays for children that aren't his (her?) responsibility? Are you going to pay towards the upkeep of your step children?

BackAwayFatty · 26/01/2017 22:35

No overnight stays, he has one other dependant.

Pays £17 a week. No extra contact, holidays etc. Barely a birthday present 😡

chitofftheshovel · 26/01/2017 22:35

£120 a month for 2 DC. A vast improvement to the diddly squat he was paying for a few years. I actually don't know his earnings, I think he's probably self employed so would lie to me anyway (or the company he works for pay some cash in hand some through the books.)

Toodlepip16 · 26/01/2017 22:39

Needsahalo
I pay towards my DSC upkeep as DP and I do not split our money, we don't have a joint account but we don't keep it separate. We have two incomes coming into our house, both both pay towards the bills and our DC and we both share whatever is left.
I'm not saying ExP's new partner should pay towards upkeep, I'm saying she has two incomes in her household, as do we, paying the bills. So the maintenance should go on the child... i.e. The money we pay.
In addition, I do spend money on DSC. We have a lovely relationship, and do lots of things without my DP which I contribute towards as if they were my own DC

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witsender · 26/01/2017 22:40

£300 on a £50k salary sounds very low. Holidays aren't considered.

Toodlepip16 · 26/01/2017 22:41

And on the contrary to what I said before, some crap dad's get such a good deal backawayfatty Sad

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LockieS · 26/01/2017 22:43

£1000 a month, 4DC, 2 dads

3 nights a week (same schedule). They pay for extras, uniform and half of all trips. I'm very lucky and feel sick at how some of my friends have been shafted.

bettycat81 · 26/01/2017 22:43

Just had my yearly calculation through.... I should be receiving £7 a week... and I haven't got anything since before xmas.

I will be challenging it.

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