Want to gauge opinion re party invites. Would this make you want to refuse an invitation?

[KlingybunFistelvase]

A relative of mine sent out emails a while ago inviting lots of us to their birthday party (it's a big birthday). The party is coming up soon and they haven't received any rsvps from anyone except immediate family, which is a bit sad, and I wonder if it's because the invite was a bit off-putting?

I'll not post the invite here, as don't want to put myself too much, but basically the email asked everyone to bring a dish to the party. It is a theme party, so the dishes are all supposed to fit with the theme. Everyone is meant to try all the dishes and it's meant to be a bit of fun I think. It's not that the relative doesn't want to provide food or that they can't afford it; tasting each other's dishes meant to be the entertainment I think.

I don't mind bringing something along at all, especially as I am family. In fact, I would have offered even if I hadn't been asked, but I suppose I am used to parties just being parties where the host provides food, drinks etc and everyone else just attends or offers to bring something.

Aibu to think the invite was a bit off-putting for some people?

Honeydew melon with those red sugary cherries was still a standard starter

Lime cordial

I think it's a pretty fun, easy and cheap theme.. I'ld never have the guts to be that demanding myself, but I'ld go happily if invited

My mum always used to produce the half a grapefruit with cheese and pineapple sticks hedgehog with a flourish at parties grin

I still do - it's not a party without a cheese hedgehog!!
(I don't do classy parties lol)

I went to a party with this theme last year, and I did dress up 80s - brightly coloured tracksuit and high. Quite a few people didn't dress up, and it was made clear on the invitations that it was completely optional, which I think was important.

I wouldn't have known what to make though. A google for 80s food suggests things like party rings and skips, which I would be happy to bring to a party but I couldn't exactly present it as a "dish" to the host.

Tinsel Is that you mum?

Drinks wise: my mum and her friends pretty much thought they'ld invented Pimms in the late 80s LOL

Bloody marys

Advocat

And package holidays were on the up and people were bringing back Lemonchello and Ouzo from abroad and wheeling it out (literally) at parties

yes, skips were in
garlic bread was exotic and fancy
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can I come?

Also other things people thought were foreign and fancy and a cue to tell you all about their latest package holiday trip: Tiramasu, calamari, etc

I'd struggle with that theme. I've been to similar parties with a country theme e.g. Chinese, Mexican etc.
I wouldn't go to any party that involved fancy dress. It's crap.

High PONYTAIL! I did not turn up to the party high

I went to a party with this theme last year- brightly coloured tracksuit and high

Now that sounds like my kind of party.

It does sound like fun, even to me, I'm pretty much anti cooking & anti fancy dress, so I'm not sure why, but yeah, I'd go. I think because it's ultra flexible & easy pretty much like the 70's

How clear was it that RSVP was required?

It's a theme to do with the era you were born in, so dress like the year you were born, make a dish for the year era you were born

instant turn off. I work and I have two kids. Does your relative think I have the time to source a 70's costume and food?

philadelphia and a french stick

CHIVES! chives on EVERYTHING! and parsley.

You can't have a late-80s party without a Soda Stream. Fact.

It's hilarious that people are giving OP pointers on 80s outfits and food, when it was someone else who said she was born in 87!

instant turn off. I work and I have two kids. Does your relative think I have the time to source a 70's costume and food?

It's only hard/expensive if you're looking for an excuse to not go.
I work FT and have kids and I wouldn't go buying anything new, I could wear all my bracelets that I already have all at the same time, Borrow one of DHs teeshirts and put a belt round it, and frizz up my hair and do a high pony.. no extra cost/very little time
And it's not hard/expensive to pick up some party rings and a ready made trifle on the way…. doesn't have to require sourcing and making from scratch….
… unless you're looking for a reason to say no anyway..

If it's 70s I would LOVE an excuse to make a jello-salad !!!!!!

Some of these responses about some of the party food from childhood have made me really chuckle! I know that's exactly why my relative wanted this theme. She wanted it to be a bit of a laugh, but I know exactly how it could have come across (like this below):

Fly "the email doesn't really sound like an invite but more like an email of instructions for your attendance"

I'm a bit for my relative if that's what people think, as I know that's not how she meant it to come across. If it was any sort of hassle I'm sure she'd just say don't bother bringing anything, but, to someone who doesn't know my relative well, the email could have read a bit like a set of instructions, when no one had actually said they'd like to go yet. Oh dear.

My birthday cake was always the caterpillar. IT was like a Swiss roll. But a caterpillar. I got to eat the face.

I don't think I'd decline an invite from someone who I was close to just because of the theme - although I might have a grumble to dh.

I quite like that theme, but not too sure about having to try all the dishes?

Also, if each dish has to be enough for everyone, that could be quite a lot for each person to prepare!

But OP if they don't know your relative very well they're not likely to be missed are they? Surely they're inviting people they know to their birthday, and as such, they should "get it" like you do?

Anyone else remember the rabbit cakes covered with decimated coconut? I think they coconut was supposed to be the fluff??? LOL

True Tinsel.