AIBU to not provide food at a birthday party?!

[WobbleYourHead]

DS is going to be 9 next birthday. He wants a skate party at our local roller rink. The party will be 6:15pm until 7:45pm on a Sunday night (they're fixed times for parties and this is the slot available on the date we want).
We have a limited budget and without food he could invite his whole class, friends from cubs, football etc. If we cater the party then it'd drastically limit numbers.
We plan to provide drinks for the kids and there's a cafe on site that will be open if parents want to stay.
WIBU to allow him to invite all the friends he wants and skip the catering?!

And also...do what you want to do!

You're organising, if people get the hump then it's thier problem!

Yes but did you invite 50 kids in a painfully obvious attempt to make a profit on a kids party?

Personally I think it's OK to have no food provided as long as you say on the invite so parents are prepared to meet a hungry 9 yo! After an hour and a half of activity they will be hungry even if they had their tea (and I think 6.15 won't be considered 'after tea' some families eat late)
If you are considering adding a snack or crisps to the party bag I think that would be a suitable touch to send off a happy knackered kid

Riiight, as 'I want to invite more children rather than pay for food for a smaller number' really strikes you as anything other than an attempt to get more for less.

Really Astley.

Yes. No child needs 50 kids at a party. Why not have a smaller number and give those children a better time? Oh yes, you get a lot more in terms of presents from 50 than from 20.

As if. Does any 9 year old honestly have 50 friends they couldn't cope without at their party?

It's just like a wedding without food. You want the presents rather than your guests to have a good time.

Don't invite more people than you can afford,

We did a party once where we did no food. It was laser quest and we'd booked it out exclusively in the evening so it meant we could have lots of kids. Put on the invites that there would be no food so please make sure they're fed before hand. (It was a 6-8 ish party anyway) then we just provided drinks and some chocolate bars... And cake at the end. No one complained. All the kids were having so much fun they would not have wanted to stop to eat anyway

I honestly wouldn't worry, only the most uptight parents who can't won't deviate from their usual mealtime routine will decline, everyone else will have a lovely time and won't mind eating a little earlier at home.

In terms of adults there'll be me, DH, DSis plus my parents and possibly my brother! Assuming 50 kids all accept that's 10 to 1 ratio without any other adults staying.

Jeez, if her child's class has 50 kids in I'd be writing to Ofsted.

We get 50% of all parties invites say no food provided, around 90% of the no food ones are for activities, trampolining, skating, etc etc. So perfectly normal in my area. The kids love it, as long as it's on the invite absolutely no problem whatsoever. The kids get to do a free activity with all their friends, and I normally take mine to McDonalds or for pizza on the way home or there (depending on the time). Sounds like a fabulous party OP.

So basically every single child the OP's child actually knows

My son wanted an expensive party recently so I told him how many children he could have. I didn't say "ok, great, invite every single child you know and I'll just not get any food so it will be cheaper for me". I cut my cloth.

What's the obsession with kids having to eat at every social event/ activity?confused

If the party was from 2 to 3:30 I could agree, but it's during dinnertime. At least snacks and drinks are to be expected.

OP, everyone loves the party bag idea, but weigh the cost of that against the cost of catering some pizzas and french fries from the rink. It might not wind up being a huge difference, and then the kids have something more substantial, given the hour.

(I should note I dislike the normalcy of giving "gift bags" to guests at every party, especially kids' parties. Just leads to tons of money being spent on tons of faff that gets broken or forgotten in days, and then kids thinking less of those who don't or can't provide them. I'd much rather see the money spent on enhancing the party experience--but I know I'm in the cranky old minority!)

With a party the food is usually the last part sp for a 6.15-7.45 party food would be served about 7.15 so much later than usual, hence you would feed a child beforehand.

We eat at 6 ish every night, but it can be earlier if needed. We went to the panto over Christmas, it started at 6pm. The sky didn't fall down because we ate earlier. Same for a party.

I don't get the snidey references to loads of presents. Surely this is the worst part about hosting a party? Most people just buy crap for birthday parties (expcially class wide) and I seriously doubt many people want 100* crap 2 for £15 Argos toys or the like. Certainly they wouldn't want it enough to spends hundreds on a party to get it

Your head must be a miserable place to be astley is your first thought it always to think the worst of people.

Kid wants a roller disco with all of his mates from school and activities and your first thought is that his mother is on a gift grab?! There are only so many colouring books and boxes of maltesers any one child needs!

I pity you, I really do, if your view of people is so pessimistic.

No 9 year old has 50 actual friends. They have 50 children they know, not 50 friends.

Most parents tell their children that the numbers are limited so they can actually provide a decent party for the children they have invited. They don't cut costs to have a huge number of children.

Trainspotting I have twins and the biggest party we ever had was 46 kids. We received nearly 90 presents.

Stupidly I genuinely hadn't even thought about presents before the party but 90 presents (generous and appreciated though they were)was actually a pain in the neck.

Keeping track of them, hauling them all home (took two cars) and finding places for them was difficult let alone ploughing through the thank you notes with the children.

After that we ensured that party invitations were worded so that guests would only bring a present for the child they were friends with rather than for both twins. And we slimmed down party numbers.

It would be very easy to get the numbers up, and thinking about it, if I was hiring out a whole rink with a limit of 150 then I would invite every kid in the neighbourhood just to get as much use out of it as possible. And as I posted above, I would bill it as a disco rather than a party which would hopefully avoid the excess of presents problem.