To stop work

[hurtingbackachingheart]

I can never make my mind up, so quick thread to get other views.

Pros are, I like my job, it's school hours, it's worthwhile and it pays reasonably well.

Cons. Oh, the cons.

I'm not making a huge amount. In fact I make barely anything, due to nursery costs. This will change obviously.
I have other things I want to do ... I have got really into some voluntary work, and I could help out more there, I want to do some more voluntary work with animals but don't have time.
The house is a mess.
I have another interest I want to develop but really don't have time.

Any thoughts? I made a vague enquiring about PT but was essentially told NO.

I know you don't want to hear it but your problem is your dh who doesn't recognise that teachers work full.time so he needs to share the workload during term time. Surely he sees you doing paperwork and marking etc at home.

I don't have a lot because of the nature of my teaching role, but anyway he works late.

Ok so you're a teacher. Definitely not part time then. You must spend every evening marking/preparing. I can see how that would be overwhelming combined with young kids and all the household chores.

I think if you're going to make an official request for flexible working it would be better to do it for the new academic year. Firstly it's not likely to be granted mid year and secondly there are restrictions on how soon you can reapply if you're refused.

I'm just worried they might decide that they don't need what I do after all. If I kick up too much of a fuss. But can I just say please. TAs aren't part time. Yes they might work fewer hours than some but they do a LOT.

Aren't most places crying out for teachers? Should be easy to get back into then. I would certainly apply formally for PT/job share, if you're going to leave anyway what have you got to lose?

Wow. What subject do you teach that requires very little work outside contact hours? Most I know spend evenings and Sundays plus some holiday time working.

I am leaving this thread now - it's starting to do my head in.

That's what makes it full time. Sorry but if you really only work contact hours then that is part time ...

Eh? Most TA jobs are part time.

Why announce you're leaving a thread? Lol. Hercules I won't get into that if you don't mind. It's too identifying. Pumpkin it depends, it really does.

Are they? Ok.

Fuck me, you're a FULL TIME teacher, at least two preschool aged children, volunteer at the Samaritans and your DH does fuck all? I'm not surprised you're knackered. Most of us would struggle with all that. I suspect you wouldn't have come in for quite the level of stupidity and sanctimony from certain quarters if you'd spelled this out from the start, though.

Anyway, clearly this situation can't continue. There are a number of different things you could modify about it. If it were me, however knackered I was, I don't think I'd be putting myself at the financial mercy of someone who thought being a teacher meant I should be the one to do all the housework.

I think you knew fine well that "I work in a school" would be perceived very differently to "I'm a teacher" tbh. Nobody sane thinks teachers are part time because it is well known that they do massive amounts of work outside of contact teaching hours; the same is not true for (most) TAs, admin assistants, etc. It also changes the impact on your career, future job prospects, pension etc.

You said upthread you had namechanged anyway so being so disingenuous has done you no favours here. Had you said "I'm a teacher and DH works full time too" you would have got very different responses.

However, the element which wouldn't have changed; all the posters telling you that the problem is your DH rather than your job and that he needs to pull his lazy sexist socks up.

My role is a bit of a funny one to be honest as I do teach but it's not in a conventional way with classes which is why I'm being a bit vague.

No problem. All I meant was, with QTS you should find it easier to go back to work if you decide to in the future.

Why not give SAHM a try if you think it'll make you happier? I ran my own business for years when my kids were small meaning I was at home with them, have only been back at work since they've been older-there's a lot to be said for being there for your kids though I'm not sure my house was any cleaner!

Statistically challenged sums it up nicely

I will say again, that my role isn't a 'proper' teaching one, and I'm not going to have my hand forced. I don't have to do much outside of school. But I am in every day and it's that I am tired by.

Yep, all good points statistically.

If you have some kind of niche role I'd think very carefully before you give it up.

Op no one is trying to 'force your hand' it's just hard to give relevant advice without the full picture!

Agreed ilovesooty - especially one that means no work outside contact hours, that must be pretty rare in the teaching world.

The point is, if I'd said I was a teacher everyone would naturally have assumed I have bags of marking and planning, I don't, not really, but that doesn't mean my role has NONE (just less than normal if you like) and also, I'm not part time.

I don't know ils, maybe I just need to accept my lot and not fight it.

But I've given you the relevant facts, I work these hours, I am finding it hard. Maybe some wouldn't, but they are not me.