Because of comments like this, is why people are terrified of SS.

[KungFuPandaWorksOut16]

We was all at a friends house for a few drinks last night, before heading to a house party. The friends (I'll refer too her as A) house we was at she has 3 children - 7 yo twins and a 3 yo. Another friend (B) went into the fridge and gasped at how if social services was to enter her house they'd take the children of her due to lack of things in the fridge. I went to have a look and yes it was a bit emptyish, but has just been christmas, family of 5 all of work/school. She had two bottles of juice, sandwich meat, cheese spread, yoghurts and some chocolates from selection boxes.

A, laughed and said don't be silly.
B told her she wasn't joking because she has a friend who knows a lady () , and her fridge looked like this and SS swooped in and took the children away until she restocked her fridge.

Now A is a born worrier, she's nearly in tears by this point and says she hasn't got any money until Friday to stock the fridge back up to its full capacity as she didn't expect the family to go through so much so quickly.

B told her the other lady used that "excuse" and SS still removed the children.

I told B too bugger off trying to scare her and B insisted it was most definitley a real story. Luckily after the alcohol started flowing all seemed forgotten about until I got a text this morning of A, along the lines of
" would you be able too borrow me £30 until Friday? Do you think £30 will be enough to fill my fridge?"

im trying to calm A down by saying this is allowed of bullshit what B said, but am I right or is B?

AIBU to think because of people like B, families who do genuinley need help and guidance, don't admit it because of these kind of horror stories?

Who is terrified of SS? It's unpleasant to be referred to them even if it's part of an a&e protocol and terrifying that the duty person who calls has such a poor grasp of English it's impossible to have a meaningful conversation with them so if a child was actually at risk it's a significant concern in communication and cultural terms that the social worker dealing with the matter would be able to record any information accurately, let alone make an effective assessment. So you set out the facts in writing to the director of children's services and ensure an accurate record is kept.

SS would take her shopping and restock her fridge with some basics. That would be 100 times cheaper than taking her kids into care.

B is a bully and can fuck right off. A shouldn't have anything more to do with her.

B is a nasty bitch. I'd lend A the money if I could though. Then I'd have a little chat with B and set her right about a few things.

a lot of people don't keep much in the fridge. Veg, eggs, even butter are not always refridgerated. And cupboards will have dried goods, canned foods and snacks. What's even more potty is that the fridge did have food in it.

B sounds like a very unkind person. If I were A I would be very upset.

It's rubbish. Unless a child looks malnourished they aren't going to take children away because of an empty fridge. I'm pretty sure they'd talk to the children too, and find out they're not starving.

And how would SS find out? Unless B was suggesting she was going to report A for not having food in? Because that's the only they'd come round, they don't door step parents on the off chance of finding someone without food.

My fridge is empty too, but my kids are very very well fed.

Please tell her not to worry and give B a kick up the arse for frightening her with rumours.

Friend sounds like an idiot. I'm sure she has cereal, other stuff in the cupboard and stuff in the freezer. Friend sounds very cheeky. Wouldn't bother with her and would tell her where to go.

That's what I thought, but didn't want too tell her incase I could in fact be wrong. She has full cupboards and freezers, it's just like she said the children and husband went too town on the fridge.
B wouldn't have any of it, she thoroughly believed the strained SS swooped in due to an emptyish fridge!

It can be a consideration if children are home alone so they can access easy snacks but B is a freaking idiot and why so cruel? I couldn't forgive s friend behaving to another friend like this it's so unkind.

My bil partner has just had a baby and the topic of health visitors came up, I said oh I'm having one visit next week what do they do? I'm pregnant but last time I had children they didn't come until after. She said oh they stay for 2hours, she checked we have a fridge, inspected bathroom. I was horrified. What actually happened was she gave me red book and leaflets, asked a few questions and left after about 20 mins. People talk a lot if b.s

And also is B really really that thick?

HV inspected the fridge and bathroom?? Utter bollocks.

God almighty. What kind of society do people think we live in where social workers can remove children for empty fridges? This isn't North Korea. People have rights here Children are removed under very strict criteria and an empty fridge isn't a reason.

Are Social Services actually involved in A's life?? I don't think they have the power to randomly enter homes to check fridges are sufficiently well stocked?!

You all they both sound a bit dim.

Agree very dim.

When I was a CP SW, my fridge mainly had wine, drinks and mayonnaise in it.

I usually shopped on the way home and often my children would have tea in my Mums (my paid childcare).

We used to comment that most of the houses that we had to inspect (including those on CP/CIN plans, the bedrooms were tidier than ours.

SWs aren't kept in closets and only allowed out to carry out assessments.

I read once that one of the checks SWs do if they turn up (which they don't do unless there is a concern/report of some kind made first) is to see if there is food in the house to make the child's next meal. So sandwich stuff in the fridge, bread in the freezer - sorted.

We are not all expected to have a full fridge at all times in case SW drop by. That's madness.

My fridge could do with a clean, tbh, so I'd be more worried about whether they'd judge me for not having got around to it!

Your poor friend. I think you need to gently work out if she is going to have enough food (genuinely) to feed the children until next week, or if your friend B had a (very insensitively put) point that she actually won't be able to feed her children until next week and she really does need that £30 (as opposed to just trying to make her fridge look good).

B is being ridiculous.

I work with children and some of those have social services involved with their families.

I can assure you it is not because of empty fridges.

At my last address, my neighbour really did have her child taken by SS, while she was in hospital giving birth to her new baby who went straight into SS care.

She is a figure of great tragedy and has attempted suicide, all because. SS stole her family just because she wasn't supposed to leave the child with her partner while she gave birth. This is the only detail you are given and you could be forgiven for feeling sorry for her and angry on her behalf as she really does believe this to be true.

However. I lived next door to this couple for three years. They were both drug addicts, the smell of weed was so strong it used to creep through the walls and my kids could never play in the garden. Their kitchen was often so dirty they would find random maggots - and laugh about it. They had a kitten - briefly. They locked it outside and it died of exposure. They took 3 months to dispose of the body. They were always asking to 'borrow' food for the child's meals. The man was a violent alcoholic with schizophrenia and epilepsy, the woman had attended a special school since age seven ( and yes I DO know this, I've know her since she was five, this is a tiny commmunity) and could read or remember instructions, and suffers an intermittent explosive rage disorder. She had 2 kids already in care that she had moved away from and didn't know where they lived, possibly wasn't allowed to see. Long term foster, not adopted.

These were not people you would put in charg of a chicken dinner, never mind a child.

But all people see is the tragic wronged mother, and then they tell other people, people like ops friend, " I know a woman whose kids were snatched just cos she left them with their dad!"

There is always, always more to this story. Always.

I have SS involvement, they've never looked in my fridge, they'd surely need to have worries about food to even bother.
There's often lager in my house too, never been mentioned because alcohol is not an issue, nothing about my home is, Dds behaviour is/was.

No SW randomly turns up to a door to inspect a family's fridge. B is a wanker.

Also to have children taken off you in site you need a court order or to consent. She's talking out her arse.

B is an idiot and is sprouting off rubbish without any evidence. So she looked in A fridge and made some sweeping statements. Did she know what A cupboards or freezer looked like, could have been full of food.

flogging I'm hardly dim, I believed I was correct, but then I also don't believe in giving someone false reassurance. So I wanted too make sure I was correct.
No social services involvement.
Ive agreed to lend her the money told her I'd go shopping with her, but what you normally would and I'll put it on my card and pay me back friday. Also tried to reassure her with some of your comments, but apparently B was telling her more horror stories last night.

wow, what a thing to say! SS would not remove the children in those circumstances unless there were some other very serious issues. And they wouldn't be looking in fridges unless the children were clearly neglected. If the parent stated voluntarily that they didn't have money for food and that was the only issue SS would refer to a foodbank / HV and be done with it. Honestly, some people!

My senior managers would certainly not agree the tens of thousands of pounds it would cost to accomodate children for an empty fridge would be a better alternative to an emergency £20 payment for food. That is without factoring in the emotional impact on the children of being removed from their family. The lack of understanding in the UK as to the role of safeguarding professionals and the protection of the most vulnerable members of society continues to astound me.