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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think it is too late to tell me she is now vegeterian?

288 replies

listsandbudgets · 31/12/2016 09:35

having 2 couples round for dinner tonight. this was arranged about 3 weeks ago.

just had text message from Mrs W

"hi lists just to let you know I decided to turn vegeterian just before Christmas.. so no meat, fish, gelatine , meat fat etc. Thanks."

AIBU to serve jersey a tin of macaroni cheese while everyone else enjoys starter of smoked salmon followed by roast lamb and all the trimmings?

OP posts:
DrinkFeckArseGirls · 31/12/2016 13:11

You're better person than me Grin
Just re read your OP and her text is sooo rude!

Do update us after the dinner 😆

Bubbinsmakesthree · 31/12/2016 13:15

As totally unbelievably rude as it was for the guest to drop this news last minute, OP has done the right thing. No point in deliberately giving the guest something crap as a fuck-you - it'd only sour the evening for everyone, OP included.

I hope the guest is bloody appreciative though -OP you must report back!

YouTheCat · 31/12/2016 13:15

If she turns her nose up at the vegetarian delights you have provided tell her to fuck off.

NicknameUsed · 31/12/2016 13:22

"No point in deliberately giving the guest something crap as a fuck-you - it'd only sour the evening for everyone, OP included."

This ^^. I usually cook veggie food because DD is vegetarian, so if a guest had sprung this on me It wouldn't have fazed me to rustle up something vegetarian if I had planned a meat meal.

The wine would be a different matter though and I would warn the vegetarian that the wine wasn't vegetarian and let her decide for herself how strong her principles were (wicked grin).

jmh740 · 31/12/2016 13:35

I'm veggie and I think it's very rude to let you know at the last minute I would text acknowledge to say you have already prepared the meal let her know what you have made and tell her she's welcome to bring her own main course. Drop something in about the short notice eg due to the short notice I've already shopped and started preparing the meal were having salmon and lamb please bring something suitable for your starter and main course and I will bear it in mind next time you come round.

expatinscotland · 31/12/2016 13:42

I'd have deleted the message and say I never got it and she could have just had bits of the meal that are veggie, but hope she likes the nut roast and quiche. Wouldn't alter the gravy she could have Bisto

Bubbinsmakesthree · 31/12/2016 14:19

I usually cook veggie food because DD is vegetarian, so if a guest had sprung this on me It wouldn't have fazed me

It would have fazed me if I'd suddenly had to cater for a veggie based on what's in the house.

Even so I can't believe people would deliberately put a downer on their own NYE dinner party by triumphantly presenting the guest with beans on toast. Confused

VimFuego101 · 31/12/2016 14:19

Good point about the wine up thread. Tell her the wine isn't vegetarian and that she should avoid drinking it, see how long she lasts Grin

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 31/12/2016 14:43

😂😂😂😆please please point out to get that wine is not vegeterian!

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 31/12/2016 14:43

Get - her

Aeroflotgirl · 31/12/2016 14:45

Very rude of her to let you know last minute. She could have let you know a few days ago.

Grindelwaldswand · 31/12/2016 14:50

Yanbu vegetarians are so ridiculous and faddy they only do it for the attention! I've never met a long term vegetarian. At least a Vegan diet has a basis you can respect and admire, but vegetarians contradict themselves constantly

QueenMortificado · 31/12/2016 14:53

vegetarians are so ridiculous and faddy they only do it for the attention! I've never met a long term vegetarian. At least a Vegan diet has a basis you can respect and admire, but vegetarians contradict themselves constantly

Confused Oh behave!

Confusednotcom · 31/12/2016 15:02

Grindelwaldswand oh no they don't..... Grin

kali110 · 31/12/2016 15:14

HappyFlappy never met a vegetarian who drooled over meat before, maybe i move in different circles Confused
Vegetarians can eat egg and cheese, you're thinking of vegans.

Plus, i happen to love some quorn!

kali110 · 31/12/2016 15:19

Yanbu vegetarians are so ridiculous and faddy they only do it for the attention! I've never met a long term vegetarian. At least a Vegan diet has a basis you can respect and admire, but vegetarians contradict themselves constantly*
Ha Grin some people today

theclick · 31/12/2016 15:21

I'm vegetarian as I'm Hindu and I personally find it easier to be veg (you can eat some meat but I choose not to). However I think there are a few unwritten rules:

  • don't obligate others to partake in your vegetarianism. It's your decision, not theirs
  • don't insist that everything at a party is to your liking. Others eat near - get over it.
  • don't make people choose restaurants just because they're easier for you to eat at. Ask the chef to be flexible with his dishes.

And to meat eaters:

  • cheese is nice, but we don't Just eat cheese.
DailyFail1 · 31/12/2016 15:23

It's last minute yes but unless you're prepared to he a shit host and effectively watch one of your guests leave hungry/munch on a packed lunch you need to make something. You had all day to think of something.

ClarissaDarling · 31/12/2016 15:29

It's wicked but I'd give her a lovely chilled jug of squash and no wine glass as its not vegetarian and make a point of checking all other wine for suitability!! WineXmas Smile

Blondeshavemorefun · 31/12/2016 15:34

if she had let you know when she chnaged, would have been better, not a week later and on the day of meal

i would get a veggie micromeal/quorn/nut thing

TheThingsWeAdmitOnMN · 31/12/2016 15:46

lists if ths wasn't you, I'd think it was a goady fucker thread!

(I'm vegetarian)

This is nothing to do with being vegetarian and everything to do with being a rude & stupid person.

I'd text back (well, I wouldn't because the meal would already be veggie!) ...

'No problem, we are having x starter, xyz veggies & x for dessert, so feel free to bring anything you'd like to have with that. What a shame you didn't let me know sooner I could have changed the menu, but there's no way I'm braving the shops again, it's mad out there!'😬

ohthelidcameafftheroses · 31/12/2016 15:59

I'm veggie. OP your friend is unbelievably rude. I usually offer to bring veggie food even tho ive been veggie for years

Btw im not an attention seeker and I have never drooled over meat Confused

Blondeshavemorefun · 31/12/2016 16:05

why is some wine not suitable for veggies?

is the basic chardonnay/pinot veggie friendly?

AgedRelative · 31/12/2016 16:10

Agree this is so not about vegetarianism - I'm a former veggie, DB still is, DS is coeliac and we have many friends who choose to be veggie/vegan or have food intolerances or issues with texture. I will cater for anyone generously and openhandedly (although I have a slight fear of cooking for anyone with severe allergies and go into decontamination mode and send photos of all packaging of ingredients I intend to use). But this woman would boil my piss.

SuburbanRhonda · 31/12/2016 16:12

All wine is passed through finings to remove impurities. Some wine producers use isinglass for the finings which comes from fish swim bladders (IIRC).