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Original poster

Parents who shamelessly steal school uniform and coats

208 replies

lottieandmia · 29/12/2016 00:49

How widespread is this really? I'm in the midlands btw.

My children have been to a number of different schools and when my 13 year old dd started at a very expensive girls school (on a scholarship and bursary) where the parents are many of them rich (and I mean really rich), suddenly her stuff all started to go missing. She had her new pullover stolen and therefore didn't have one to wear because they were £30 each and I could only afford to buy one. Her new PE trousers lifted out of her kit bag as well as other pieces of kit that are all very expensive.

I got really sick of it as she would turn her back for half a minute and something would be gone. The children in her class would help themselves to her stationary without asking. And then a brand new very nice water bottle went missing. I emailed her teacher and asked if an email could be sent out to all the girls in her year and also parents to say that we would like it returned. Sure enough it turned up on a shelf, left no doubt by the anonymous thief who had been guilted into returning it. Dd2 is no longer at this school and the constant stealing (and it wasn't just us it happened to) was one reason why. She is now at a state school with far more students and so far nothing has been taken and no student touches her stuff.

Dd3 is starting a new school next week and I am now paranoid about stuff going missing. Hopefully my experience with above school is a one off but I have heard a lot on MN about uniform thieves who help themselves to stuff from lost property.

Sorry to go on about this but it is my pet hate. What makes people think this is an acceptable way to behave? If I write names with sharpie I feel as though I appear paranoid or mistrustful. I feel as though I shouldn't have to do this and a name label should suffice. Sad isn't it?

OP posts:
Gileswithachainsaw · 29/12/2016 10:48

It's all very well saying label stuff but unless that item is put into the lost property box or you inspect the labels daily then a name is of no use is it.

Yes kids loose stuff but surely it would be reunited quickly if it was just left somewhere.

All these kids being given detentions for not having kit when. It's been blatantly taken is just wrong. And when kits are left on pegs or in changing rooms then of course they can't be watched every second on account of those things called lessons where you have to leave the stuff.

Dd has mainly "lost" stationary. When I say lost I mean she's lent and never got back. I got sick of replacing shit so I've now told her I'm fed up of kitting put your class and she's to say no. Barr one or two kids who are her best friends and actually return what they borrow.

Dd has brought home other people's stuff befire. I've washed and dried and returned.

If you go through the lost property box you will see things like shirts and skirts. I mean bow does someone go home with no skirt. The kid must know they have taken someone else's. Skirts in particular come in a million different styles. The kid must know. School uniform is expensive. If you have 2 or three kids it's easily several hundred pounds. Very obviously there's a reason to nick it.

mothertruck3r · 29/12/2016 10:52

How do you think rich people get rich. In my experience the richer people are the more mean, greedy and grabby and underhand they are. Wealth does something nasty to a lot of people.

woodhill · 29/12/2016 10:52

It's awful isn't it. Ds had his new football boots taken out of his shoe bag in primary. Dc often lost jumpers or cardigans, so annoying.

bevelino · 29/12/2016 10:53

SnatchedPencil, why are you saying that all children are dishonest etc and that education is better in private schools? I am very, very offended by your post.

smellyboot · 29/12/2016 10:53

IMO this is just one reason why expensive uniform and logo uniform is just a head ache. Mine have their stuff labelled to death and never really loose anything. As they have got older I only get supermarket jumpers etc and our only logo stuff is stained / hand me downs etc. I use both sharpie and iron on labels

Lilacpink40 · 29/12/2016 10:54

It only takes one child to be a thief for a lot to be taken. When I was at school my trainers and many other girls' trainers went missing over a few months. Then coats went missing and smaller items. We had regular bag checks. Finally a girl was caught wearing one of the coats when out of school. Only a few items were recovered. Her parents didn’t care, they neglected her, she was always in clothes with holes, just had a cheese sandwich for lunch and always seemed unhappy. Maybe stealing cheered her up, but it made things hard for a lot of other children as our parents assumed we hadn't been careful.

smellyboot · 29/12/2016 10:56

two observations from our school: the same parents are known to hover round the lost property bin a LOT. People susepct that they are sweeping up lost new items for themselves. When I have sorted the lost property in there almost all of it is unnamed or may have a faded name on a label in washed out biro....

Gileswithachainsaw · 29/12/2016 10:57

I think we also need someone to explain also why kids get into so much trouble for not having stuff.

Our local jumpers are between 12 amd 15 pounds. A generic pack of two can be gotten fir a fiver in a supermarket.

So schools insist on items which obviously many people can't afford to replace then the poor kids in trouble (when they don't even buy their uniform on account of being a child) fir not having a logo item.

Where is this money to replace meant to come from and why so heavy handed in kids when it's not their fault and why don't they deal with the theft

smellyboot · 29/12/2016 11:07

exactly Giles. Its the brand new KS1 logo jumpers and cardigans that new parents buy that are so attractive... so many disappear. New to school parents dont always realise quite how important it is to name tag / sharpie stuff and think initials in biro on a wash label will be enough. The long in the tooth parents at our school ditch logo stuff, dont keep replacing stuff that is stained etc and they loose a lot less !!!!!

Cherrysoup · 29/12/2016 11:07

Most common items left in my room is PE kit. I do a tidy at the end of each day, but if the kit isn't labelled, it's tricky to know which of the 180 kids who've been in my room that day it belongs to.

mummydawn07 · 29/12/2016 11:10

my dds go to a large school ( 3 classes/rooms for each year group ) stealing is a bit of an issue at this school, I've not personally had anything stolen but my eldest is always losing her cardigans, pe kit etc all of their clothes and kit for school is labelled and named ( I even wrote their names inside their pe pumps Grin but I have friends who have had things stolen, one of my friends had her dds coat stolen and it had her name inside it, in three different places! it's the only reason she got it back, because whoever took the coat their child left it and a teacher found it with the name inside and gave it back to the class teacher, my friend then showed me that the person who took the coat had ripped out 2 of the name labels

GilMartin · 29/12/2016 11:12

why so heavy handed in kids when it's not their fault and why don't they deal with the theft

Because nine times out of ten the 'stolen' jumper/tie/gloves have been lost or misplaced rather than stolen. Yes pilfering goes on, but almost inevitably they've gone because of carelessness rather than theft.

My parents were both teachers and kids would invariably claim their jumper as 'stolen' rather than lost, it would resurface miraculously in the place they'd been on the school field or the changing room or in the lost property bin and yet they'd be adamant they were victims of theft.

Can you imagine the hours wasted if the school went all Inspector Morse over every report of a tie being stolen?

notrocketscience · 29/12/2016 11:12

Hmm. Slightly suspicious of the private school bashing from an "ex-pupil" who cannot spell stolen (stollen) or weird (wierd).

Yes things do go missing, sometimes by carelessness sometimes by less honest means. Label everything and not just in the obvious places. You may not get it back but there is a satisfaction in knowing the new "owner" may get caught out eventually.

On a positive note, my youngest is Year 7 at a private school and recently came home from am after school netball match without her very expensive blazer. She was really upset as they are not allowed into the dining room without it (she does like her food!). The school were brilliant, the jacket was found on the floor of the hall out of the sports hall (where she had dropped it), the Head of Year emailed me after checking with the form tutor that it had been reunited with DD. Really happy with their care and concern. (DD is very bright, very sweet but totally untidy...)

applesandpears33 · 29/12/2016 11:15

Please don't assume that if a name on a label has been scored out that an item has been stolen. I have a very generous friend who passes on some of her DC's old clothes to me. I score out her child's name and write my DS's name underneath.

mummydawn07 · 29/12/2016 11:16

just thought I'd add it is a primary school years reception - year 6, the lost property is just a nightmare you could be easily stuck there for a good 20-30 mins huting through it all, though I do normally find things that my dd loses, but I have also seen things like lunchboxes, knickers, teaspoons, backpacks.. I do wonder how some of these items end up in lost property

Gileswithachainsaw · 29/12/2016 11:17

Well if it's just "misplaced" it would he where they eat it then surely? There's only so many places it could be. Classroom, changing room, or playground.

If it's not then someone else has done something with it.

Gileswithachainsaw · 29/12/2016 11:17

Where they left it.

Original poster
lottieandmia · 29/12/2016 11:25

'All children are dishonest' what rubbish.

OP posts:
BoneyBackJefferson · 29/12/2016 11:28

Bonhomie321

With regards to the lockers, when I started at my current school each child was allocated a locker.

The result at lunch time, bags all over the playground.

We now ask the parents if the pupils want a locker (pre-transition and during the first year)

the complaint now is that pupils cash in their key and don't tell their parents.

GilMartin · 29/12/2016 11:31

Giles yes if it has been left mouldering for a few days, there's a good chance it is going to get moved or picked up by a cleaner or smaller items just lost in a nook or cranny. Thieves don't tend to crave a single glove or football sock.

Foolishly I used to try telling them things I'd lost had been stolen as I thought it might deflect the blame. Of course I just got a bigger bollocking for lying to them and got the advice they doled out to kids in their class, a) try going to the last place you had it b) try lost property c) have a think where else it could be d) try lost property in a few days to see whether it has worked its way through the system e) as I got older decide whether I wanted to do without the item or replace it myself.

BoneyBackJefferson · 29/12/2016 11:31

lottieandmia

You are correct in that not all children are dishonest, but (hard hat on) some are economical with the truth.

We had a child whose parent was up in arms about the amount of pe kit she had to replace (rightly so). We found the child trowing his pe kit up on the roof of a building, on searching the roof all of his pe kits were there.
Even thought he had been caught he still tried to blame it on 'other pupils'

Bauble16 · 29/12/2016 11:36

My DC goto state school and jumpers are £13 each. Ties are £6. Kids go home in the wrong stuff then parents benefit. They must do as when I'm ironing I notice all labels

Original poster
lottieandmia · 29/12/2016 11:40

You think that when a PE kit goes missing the most likely explanation is the child is throwing it onto a roof? I would think that unusual...

I remember my dd taking her swimming kit to school. One of the problems with this school was that they had cubbys and not lockers. Her entire swimming kit was taken out of its cubby and made a reappreance about 2 months later, thrown onto the floor of the room it had been taken from with goggles missing. Swimsuit and towel had been used and just thrown onto the floor.

OP posts:
MiaowTheCat · 29/12/2016 11:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GilMartin · 29/12/2016 11:51

O don't think boney was saying that Lottie only that every claim of theft in a school can't be taken at face value as nearly every lost item from hankies to pencil sharpeners are reported as 'miss, miss someone's stolen x from me' rather than 'I might have lost x' or even 'x has gone missing'

And yes, children can be economical with the truth if they think it will keep them out of trouble with parents or teachers. I was at that age, in fact I told bloody great whoppers if I thought I could get away with it and I wasn't a particularly bad kid either.