AIBU: The threads that annoy you most

[user1471517900]

Like those where the OP writes hardly anything and expects others to entertain them.

Now you go.

Yeah. But you can't feed a family of four with a chicken for one week.

And dialling 911 puts you through to 999. And just because a mumsnetter has done something doesn't mean it's not a waste of police time.

Solicitors

Yes some solicitors offer a free half hour as a marketing tool, but that is entirely at their discretion. Often it is stated as if it is a mandatory service that all solicitors must offer, you'll see 'go to a solicitor and claim your free half hour of advice' offered to the poster.

The mumsnet chicken. If everyone have a tiny chicken sandwich every day for a week you could make it last a week. But it couldn't serve as the main source of sustinance for a whole family for a week.

The 'mumsnet chicken' thing more often than not is a catch all term for finger waging lady bountiful types who claim you can feed whole families almost indefinitely on tiny amounts of food and money if only the poster wasn't so wasteful and suggest spending hours and a huge amount of fuel money boiling chicken bones to make an unapatising broth or something.

Getting it logged with the police

Of course you can call up 101 and tell the police that a bloke has been sat in a car outside your house for two minutes or that the neighbours are giving you dirty looks and they will probably thank you for your information. It doesn't mean there's a special logbook the police kept by the police phone for mumsnet users to report baseless suspicions.

Any thread to do with food always descends into utter nonsense with posters banging on about the evilness of carbs and raisins rotting teeth within 10 seconds and how a sip of Ribena will make your child spontaneously combust.

Oh and the ones about not drinking until your child is 30 in case you have to drive them to A&E.

The food threads are so bizarre.

10% normal people with normal attitudes to food
45% competitive healthy eating ("well my child is 6 and gets celery as a treat and has never tasted sugar and says "mummy I feel sorry for children who have to eat in McDonalds, their mummies don't care about them")
45% competitive unhealthy eating ("well this morning I ate 10 multi-packs of Twixes and I'm still alive. Chill out.")

I have clearly missed out on the food threads! They sound hilarious!

Sorry, but I love getting cross at the 'aibu? Yes! No I'm not!' Threads must get a life

The food threads are crazy. From 'my family need a whole chicken each for dinner, I can't believe anyone has leftovers' to 'my children are hungry all the time, it's normal to be hungry. At dinner I allow them to sniff a roast chicken and eat half a carrot. We've lost sight of normal portion sizes'.

What's infuriating about mumsnet forums is you can't go back in and edit your contribution. I belong to another forum where you can not only do that but also click an 'agree' or 'disagree' button, also 'funny' and 'interesting'. Also not being able to reply to a specific forum member is irritating. Seems to be a rather primitive forum system!

I like that you can't delete or edit. It means people can't delete it when they've said something awful.

''What are you having for dinner''? Really? Are you serious?. Get. a. life.

I find the threads where OPs invite other posters to pore over a scan showing their foetus's genitals in an attempt to identify their sex a bit odd.

The ones where OP asks 'what do we think of 'X''

Because what they mean is 'what do people who I'll never meet but who's opinion I revere think of this, because like a sheep I will follow'

I totally understand the ones asking for opinions on outfits, names, menu for a dinner party. It's the communal 'we' I object to.

'What are you having for dinner''? Really? Are you serious?. Get. a. life.

I love those threads. They write my meal plan for me when I'm out of ideas.

That said, the replies which say "home made chicken goujons with hand cut Maris Piper wedges, fresh tomato and red pepper salsa, and baby sweetcorn" make me eye roll.

Sorry, the upthread was for the masturbating leylandii.

Can't take your eye off this thread...

Anything with dear reader or discuss. The who is your favourite mner, they don't really happen now like they did a few years ago. The kisses at the end of posts always throws me. When I first joined that was an utter no no. I've also seen hubby,hun,lol used more in the last year or so. Also I find the ddog/dcat a bit odd.

Talking of which Lumela I am still waiting for the link to the masturbating leylandii, and much as I love a mil or a food thread that sounds a lot more interesting.

I find the threads where OPs invite other posters to pore over a scan showing their foetus's genitals in an attempt to identify their sex a bit odd.

Worse than that. Side photos that don't show the genitals at all.

Bit, I'm wondering how Leylandii manage it. With their twigs?

And I can see why it would annoy the neighbours.

Lumela Yeah all that rustling, it would be really annoying for the neighbours.

The tell me what you earn/how much disposable income do you have?

Why are you interested in what an anonymous stranger on the internet earns/ spends on fripperies each month. Most of it is just bragging and bullshit anyway.

Bragging and bullshit,aye.but I love reading those threads.The £££ spent on flowers,fripperies I think Elton john posts

This might sound paranoid, but I never reply to the 'how much do you earn/what is your job/what is your middle name/what year were you born' type threads. It smacks of data farming to me.

I hadn't considered that angle