Thank you Worra.
Ghost I am often the person on the thread saying 'hang on a minute, are you quite sure you would be saying that if the OP were a man/woman?'
And there is always someone who rolls their eyes and says 'Oh how tedious, do we really have to do this on every thread now? and then 'waa waa wot about the poor menz' type comments.
Well sorry if it is a boring inconvenience to have hypocrisy repeatedly pointed out, but yes we really do have to do this. Listen to yourselves. I am sick to death of such thinly veiled prejudice and the MN culture of 'presumed to be guilty until proven innocent but even then, we don't trust you and we'd like to hear your wife's version so you are probably still guilty.'
It's so very, very different from the way women who present with basically the same problem are almost unilaterally believed, empathised with, supported and given constructive useful advice, even when they have admitted they've been abusive, controlling, unfaithful or some other way badly behaved.
There are so many horrendous examples of this, I swear one day when I've nothing better to do, I'm going to pull them all from the archives and present them side by side for comparison.
Posters who are irritated or bored by seeing it repeatedly questioned should perhaps put their energies into looking inward for the answer rather than outward.