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AIBU?

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Original poster

WIBU to leave 10 year old at home with his nan while the rest of us go to Florida?

350 replies

user1482217471 · 20/12/2016 07:16

10 year old son has caught a nasty bug and he is pretty much in bed 24/7 and has been for a couple of days. He has been having lots of fluids but has the full d & v. He is ok though but no way is he ok to come away. We rarely go on big holidays but do go to somewhere in Europe every year. We are going to Orlando for Christmas I have 5 children and I think it will be really magical. He is very close to my nan and they spend a lot of time together. The last thing I want to do is leave him but I do have 4 other children that cannot wait for this holiday and I don't really know what to do. WIBU to go away with other children and leave him here with his nan?

OP posts:
Original poster
user1482217471 · 20/12/2016 07:46

Tales, I didn't think it would be worth getting an emergency gp appointment, I know what it is and I know that the NHS doesn't enjoy people bringing general bugs (that need time to pass) into a medical setting. Of course if he needs to go I'd take him.

I know Florida is expensive... what has that got to do with it? Quite frankly I have said the circumstances and that's why I am taking them.

OP posts:
Hulababy · 20/12/2016 07:48

You must have a doctors letter if your trying to claim in the insurance. You can't just tell them and they believe you. You'll need to speak to his GP asap.

Speak to BA (or whoever you've booked it with) as soon as they open today. Ask them what the protocol is. They may be able to move the day to a couple of days time.

Is it a d and v big? How long has he had it? Most don't last that long, so depending on when the last time he was sick was it might be coming to an end and you'd only need to have it moved a day or two back.

ALSO: If you do cancel, make sure to cancel any Disney dining reservations else you'll get charged.

TalesoftwoChristmasses · 20/12/2016 07:49

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Original poster
user1482217471 · 20/12/2016 07:49

If I need to get a not fit to fly do I need to take him with me?

OP posts:
Blacksox · 20/12/2016 07:49
Hmm

So you'd even consider leaving a recently bereaved 10 year old behind over Christmas as you go off on holiday with all his siblings?

luckylucky24 · 20/12/2016 07:49

I would try and swap the flights to thursday. D&V should have cleared by then. However there is the possibility that the rest of you will get it.

Original poster
user1482217471 · 20/12/2016 07:50

Just report me then ffs. You're wrong allegations don't help anyone.

OP posts:
puddingpadding · 20/12/2016 07:50

That's really awful OP.

longdiling · 20/12/2016 07:50

How long are you going for? Could he fly unaccompanied when he's better, I know some airlines allow this and could look after him.

TalesoftwoChristmasses · 20/12/2016 07:50

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Original poster
user1482217471 · 20/12/2016 07:51

How am I awful? I don't think you quite understand how fucking stressful this situation is. I have 4 other children who I'm trying to keep happy as well.

OP posts:
TalesoftwoChristmasses · 20/12/2016 07:51

Who could enjoy a holiday of a lifetime with one child left at home??

What's wrong with you?

ememem84 · 20/12/2016 07:51

Surely if it's a d&v bug there's a chance (albeit small) that the rest of you could get it?

I wouldn't leave him behind given the circumstances and probably wouldn't risk taking the rest of them. Not fun to be ill away from home.

1horatio · 20/12/2016 07:52

You want to give them a wonderful Christmas, of course.

But Christmas is about family!

I honestly don't think there's more to be said.

I am a bit surprised you didn't take him to the doctor, considering the trip. But can't change that now...

TalesoftwoChristmasses · 20/12/2016 07:52

But you haven't even called a doctor?!?!

DorothyL · 20/12/2016 07:52

Considering the bereavement there is even more reason not to leave him behind.

Bobsmum02 · 20/12/2016 07:53

I wouldn't normally take a child to a doctor with d&v but given the circumstances I would, the doctor can either give you an unfit to fly or can give advice on when he's likely able to fly.

He should be ok to fly 48 hours after last d&v incident so there is still time to go if you can rearrange flights. This is why you are better speaking to your insurance and BA to see if this is even a possibility.

I'm sorry for your loss!

TalesoftwoChristmasses · 20/12/2016 07:54

You'll go to the doctors to get a not fit to fly but not a solution...

Okay.

1horatio · 20/12/2016 07:54

If you make it clear that you would have done the same for every child of yours and that you'll go next year there shouldn't be too much/any resentment either.

lokisglowstickofdestiny1 · 20/12/2016 07:54

Unless you've all had this bug, it's not a small chance it's a pretty big one that you will get it. You don't want to take your son to the doctors but don't seem to have thought about getting on a plane, even more confined space than a surgery possibly with this bug? Get a not fit to fly certificate, contact your insurers and move your flights.

Thornrose · 20/12/2016 07:54

The children's first Christmas without their dad is the major deal in all of this.

Is it your grandmother or your mum you were thinking of leaving him with? You said "his nan" then "your nan".

JustDontGetIt · 20/12/2016 07:55

So sorry OP to hear about your DH. I think as you know it's a time for you all to be together. I think the others would miss their brother too if they went without him. Definitely call your insurance and re-arrange if that's an option then you can see if you can extend the trip when you're out there? Just see what your insurance says. I don't think you want to leave him anyway. Sounds like you have lovely kids and a supportive mum. All the best OP

ChristmasTreeCat · 20/12/2016 07:55

I would call your doc's surgery and ask their advice. Say you need a note and explain the circumstances. My docs sometimes do home visits for things like this rather than take the bug into the surgery. They have once given a note on the basis of a phone call but there was relevant recent history. Contact your insurance and ask what they.could do. I think know if you can either you or nan flying out with the dc today and book the other adult a flight to bring ds out in a couple of days. I wouldn't send him on such a long flight unaccompanied after being too poorly to fly just days before at just 10.

I really hope you get sorted. You need to speak to gp and insurance because everyone on here is just guessing, it depends on the terms of your cover.

TalesoftwoChristmasses · 20/12/2016 07:55

My kids would definitely accept that they couldn't go.

I've flown long haul alone with little children who've started d&v mid flight.

Gatehouse77 · 20/12/2016 07:55

We cancelled a holiday for the same reason - DD (3 at the time) had horrendous diarrhoea and we were going on a camping holiday. There was no way I was dealing possible d&v whilst in a tent with 3 under 6!
I got an emergency appointment specifically to get a Dr's note for the insurance.

And guess what? No one else caught it!! But I don't regret cancelling it. I do empathise with how hard it is to make the decision and I hadn't had a bereavement added into the mix.

I would get a Dr's note, speak to your insurance and the holiday company before making any hard and fast decisions.

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