Dad 'choosing' to pronounce DD's name differently

[runningaftermydreams]

This is the first post I've written. Apologises for bad spelling... I am writing in anger.

So my DD is 3 months old and I given her an usual name, which I have accepted people will/do pronounce it wrong because they don't know how to say it, its easy Once you know though. My Ddad seems to struggle with it, except today I was visiting with my DC and my Ddad said her name wrong (Again!) so my Dsis corrected him (again) to which my DDad response was "Well it shouldn't be pronounced like that it should be pronounced the way I said it, I am saying it this way"

It then got heated because I told him you can't do that it will confuse her as it doesn't sound anything like her name. He said shes too little to notice. I said he needs to call her by her name that we have given her end of!!
Im fuming because he blatantly told me hes choosing to pronounce it differently, I know this won't be the end of it. I am hurt by this. I know he doesn't like it because it's not a "solid english" name (hmmm my mom is german so hes being a dick), but I wish he would respect our choice.

I am worried about what DP will say when Ddad says her name over Christmas at family gatherings. Think its going to kick off, as this won't be the first time recently where DP has disagreed with him.

AIBU to be angry about this? Wwyd?

I doubt it - foreigners are all weird, anyway.

Although if you claim to be English...

Good ;)
Do you perhaps also know why MIL dislikes the loo-library or our chairs?

Would really appreciate an explanation. From anybody :)!!

round

What? I don't claim to be English? DH is English.

Anybody knows I'm not English after hearing me speak for... 5 seconds. (Unless I stick to yes and no answers, I guess)

If by loo library, you mean having books in your toilet to read whilst on the loo... I thought that was a proud English tradition. Maybe your book choices are too highbrow and she thinks you should stick to 20-year old copies of The Reader's Digest, magazines and Jilly Cooper novels.

I'm intrigued by your chairs. Do they look like loos?

So... there are 3 sport magazines, something about horses (I wonder where that came from,,,?), the cursed child, a Jane Austen, I ❤️ Christmas, a book for studying Italian (it's DH's...), a few comics (mine), two Murakami Books and a few others in the upper loo. and two books about Swtzerland 😂 (And yes, I was standing in the loo whilst typing this...)

The chairs? They're from my nonna's family home in Italy, wood. Don't look like loos

I can only imagine your MIL is disapppointed not to find anything she likes to read in your collection. Although when house hunting, I was once shown around a house by someone who had not a single book on display and who said proudly that they had ripped all the bookcases out when they moved in, because they thought there was nothing more vulgar, messy and unpleasant than displaying your books for the world to see. They had no such difficulty with the idea of displaying their taste in china ornaments in glass cabinets, however.

Are the chairs comfortable? Maybe your MIL has an unfortunate case of piles and could do with a bit more padding on them.

Horribly uncomfortable.

But we shall endure 😂😂

That person would hate our house. There are books in pretty much every room! ;)

(Well, not in the pantry. Or where we put coats and stuff...)

ah-nah-ess?
TBF, I struggle with the Ah-nah bit when I try and link it together with the 'ess' at the end. :/ I too have always said 'An-ay' for Anais.
He probably can't say it and is getting defensive because of this.

Id say ah-nay or a-nais (as in grace)

The other versions listed on here seem totally odd to me!

It's a lovely name but I'd never use it purely because of the pronunciation issues which will last a lifetime.

Afraid it is a French name usually pronounced An-ay-ees. So you can't blame people for pronouncing it correctly. And you have to accept that this may be a problem your daughter has throughout her life.
HOWEVER...you have told him how you would like it pronounced and he needs to respect that. I have friends who named their youngest daughter Eleanor. I (mis)pronounced it 'Elena' once and the eldest daughter chastised me for it. I have pronounced it El-eh-nore ever since (as per their wishes).

Why did you give your child a name you can't pronounce?
Just remove the diaeresis ï from the name if you aren't going to use it.
Anais (though I always think of pineapple).
My son went to school with a child he swore was 'Fiaff'.
Turns out she was a 'Faith' but said in a broad NI accent.

I always imagined it would be said Uh-nayce (to rhyme with race or pace).

I want to chain myself to fence & defend the OP's dad. Go for a different name or don't be surprised if people have their own ideas how to say it.

(and yes people come up with weird ways to say or spell my name. I don't mind at all)

But OP is using the diaeresis, and is pronouncing it properly!

Ann - I - eese

I know one and it's 'an ace' anais. An ais.

Slightly stunned by the chorus of 'change your baby's name because I, a stranger on the internet, cannot pronounce it'.

Your baby's name is lovely and people will learn how to pronounce it along with all the other 'non-English' names that exist in our increasingly global and connected world.

Ignore your father. Enjoy your baby, and her lovely name, and no doubt lovely toes, ears, squishy snuggliness and smile

OP says she will be saying it ah-nah-ess

The normal way is ann-eye-ees

I don't think she's saying it 'right' even though she is having the normal number if syllables.

^
|
That!

"people will learn how to pronounce it"

Well, they'll have to, as the parents haven't chosen the ordinary way.

Total PITA for the child.

Yours

Winnie

(Pronounced, as decreed by my parents, wine-eye-ee)

Rancid Someone earlier linked a 'pronunciation guide' and OP said that it was the same way.
I think she didn't type it very well phonetically

You could do a proper French pronunciation - but that's not really on. Easiest way to pronounce it in English:

The name "Anna". Then take the word "peace" and remove the 'p':

Anna-eace.

An eye ees? It that really right? I honestly think an-ace sounds much nicer 😊 esp if not actually French!

We've probably driven away the poor OP now. Sorry OP. I hope the baby has a nice middle name.

That's British English, not American. They mangle it