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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU.. What exactly is feminism?

277 replies

FedUp24 · 19/12/2016 09:53

Hi ladies

What exactly is feminism?

I've always thought it is women fighting for equal rights as men, but there seems to be more to it?

Do feminists believe that all men believe they are superior to women? Are women who choose to not be feminists not really choosing? They only think they are?

I'm just a bit confused!

OP posts:
drspouse · 19/12/2016 12:08

I have never seen rape and abuse being promoted as a positive thing in our societies, have you?

Did you read my link or are you too lazy?

Daisyfrumps · 19/12/2016 12:10

Feminism to me (and I thought everyone else) means that males and females have equal rights to be treated with respect and consideration.

Coffeerun · 19/12/2016 12:13

I would say that rape, and also sexualisation of women and little girls is heavily promoted in our society. In music videos, in popular music, on television, in the media, massively in porn which children are accessing.

Take lyrics from certain songs.

Pitbull "she says she won't but I bet she will".

Robin Thicke Blurred Lines.

user1471545174 · 19/12/2016 12:14

BertrandRussell I used that Rebecca West quote on one of the other suspiciously numerous AIBU feminist threads and didn't get any love for it at all. I think it's a great quote.

Original poster
FedUp24 · 19/12/2016 12:27

I strongly disagree that men are encouraged to rape women! That is a ridiculous statement.

The conviction rape is so low because it's extremely difficult to prove with the issue of consent.

OP posts:
amispartacus · 19/12/2016 12:33

I strongly disagree that men are encouraged to rape women

How do you think women are portrayed in the media?
What messages are given out to men about women through easy access to porn?
How do you think men and boys see women and girls?

minipie · 19/12/2016 12:35

Here's my definition of feminism:

  1. Believing that women and men/girls and boys should be treated equally

  2. Believing that women and men/girls and boys are not currently always treated equally

  3. Believing that we need to make changes to ensure that women and men/girls and boys are treated equally in the future

So if you believe 1), but you think it's already been achieved and there is nothing that needs fixing, then you are not a feminist.

By the by, being treated equally does not mean "exactly the same in every way". Obviously there are biological differences which mean that would be impossible/absurd/unfair. It means "no worse than".

Original poster
FedUp24 · 19/12/2016 12:38

amispartacus Are you suggesting that women in porn are being raped? Women are in porn because they choose to be.

I don't believe my partner sees me a woman he can rape as he sees fit nor do the majority of other men.

OP posts:
DJBaggySmalls · 19/12/2016 12:38

I strongly disagree that men are encouraged to rape women
Thats a disingenuous statement and does not define rape culture.
Rape culture is far more insidious than the statement 'go out and rape women.'

BertrandRussell · 19/12/2016 12:39

"I don't believe my partner sees me a woman he can rape as he sees fit nor do the majority of other men."

Of course he doesn't and of course they don't.

Bobkinyoyo · 19/12/2016 12:39

I strongly disagree that men are encouraged to rape women! That is a ridiculous statement

Missswatch · 19/12/2016 12:40

Feminism is NOT: Believing all men are rapists

Bobkinyoyo · 19/12/2016 12:41

Women are in porn because they choose to be.

They "choose" to be in the context of a society which, to be simplistic about it, hates women.

Such a choice is not really a choice.

DJBaggySmalls · 19/12/2016 12:41

Women are in porn because they choose to be.
Really? Is that your take on it? OK then.

Bobkinyoyo · 19/12/2016 12:41

Who said it was miss?

DJBaggySmalls · 19/12/2016 12:43

I don't believe my partner sees me a woman he can rape as he sees fit nor do the majority of other men.

Most men would say that about a woman they know if they were asked.
But in one survey, 1 in 3 college men would commit a rape if it was guaranteed they could get away with it.

''Denying Rape but Endorsing Forceful Intercourse: Exploring Differences Among Responders''
online.liebertpub.com/doi/abs/10.1089/vio.2014.0022?journalCode=vio

BertrandRussell · 19/12/2016 12:44

And if you can watch mainstream porn and not think that it is implying very strongly to men that rape is OK, then perhaps you should look again......

drspouse · 19/12/2016 12:46

Women are in porn because they choose to be.

Yes, that's right, and all prostitutes are high class call girls who used to be in another profession but chose this, have their own penthouse flats and are at no risk at all from their clients.

And I'm Marie of Roumania.

Missswatch · 19/12/2016 12:46

You are confusing regular porn with fetish porn. Rape porn I'm sure exists but probably on the dark web or something. But you get cuckold porn, interracial porn, watersports, scat porn etc too

Datun · 19/12/2016 12:49

Some lads mags did a survey, asking students to differentiate between the quotes from convicted rapists and quotes from normal readers.

"Perhaps the most alarming was one in which 274 American college students were asked to identify which quotes were from lads' mags, such as Nuts, Zoo, Loaded, FHM and Unilad, and which were from rapists. They were unable to do so."

drspouse · 19/12/2016 12:49

Sorry, who's doing that Miss?

BertrandRussell · 19/12/2016 12:53

No I'm not. "Regular" two clicks away porn that our children can watch in the playground on their phones shows women being frightened and hurt. Or being constantly up for it.

drspouse · 19/12/2016 12:58

And that's leaving aside the personal situations of the women who work in the "industry", and their motivations for getting into it (as the OP suggests they "choose" to be in porn).

BertrandRussell · 19/12/2016 13:01

I think it's usually "because they love sex", drspouse. Or "to fund their PhDs"

Missswatch · 19/12/2016 13:04

Just been to pornhub Bert. Looks like acting to me