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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To lol at the feminism threads....

999 replies

Hannah4banana · 18/12/2016 00:58

Seriously are people constantly looking out for a way to be offended Hmm first world problems!

OP posts:
amispartacus · 18/12/2016 10:33

but were told by feminists we do unless of course we agree with all the bullshit everything they say

What things have you been told 'all men ' agree with?

iamadaftcoo · 18/12/2016 10:34

Nothing at all.

Can you please point out examples of feminists hating men?

user1482025636 · 18/12/2016 10:34

I've been raped so I would like a world without abuse. Do you think feminists are striving for a world where we have more abuse, seriously? Go to the boards and read the threads, educate yourself.

Dame I only ask that question to make a theoretical point. If women have equal power to men, then presumably they will abuse that power to an equal degree.

So equal power for men and women does not mean less abuse of power. It just means equal power. If you want to cultivate a society in which there is less abuse of power in human societies overall, then that is a different agenda.

Lweji · 18/12/2016 10:35

Not all men are rapists but all rapists are men

Just be honest feminists and just say you dont want equality but advantage and I can understand that and then I'd shut up, its the hypocrisy I cant stand.

What!?Shock

EnormousTiger · 18/12/2016 10:35

Most of us want similar things - no dscrimination on grounds of gender. It's pretty simple. You can cricitise each other's views on particular aspects within that or whatever but at heart I bet most of us on this thread agree.

Some issues will matter more to others than not such as women doing more than men at home with domestic jobs or not enough women in board rooms or whatever are people's particular issues but we probably all agree the fact men own 99% of the world's wealth and earn 2/3rds of its income is not very fair.

brasty · 18/12/2016 10:36

Which is why the kind of feminism I subscribe to does not want equal power to abuse, but a change so nobody is being abused. It is not about equality.

JustAnotherPoster00 · 18/12/2016 10:37

Equal doesn't mean the same. When we say "equal opportunities" we don't mean 'treat everyone the same' we mean 'remove the barriers in place to ensure equality of access'.

Innacurate, the pay gap myth comes from wanting equality of outcome not equal opportunity

InfiniteCurve · 18/12/2016 10:37

I've never seen anyone say all men believe the same things - I' d have to be pretty stupid and unobservant to get to my age without realising individuals have different beliefs.That's different from thinking about men as a class.
And if the definition of rape is penetration of a vagina with a penis,then ,yes - all rapists are men.Which isn't to say all no woman ever sexually assaults or abuses.That's a different discussion.

user1482025636 · 18/12/2016 10:38

Agree bratsy, but then you have to think about how to create a social structure in which there is less overall abuse of power - whether that abuse be sexual, social, political or economic. That involves feminism but transcends it.

PacificDogwod · 18/12/2016 10:38

Living in a societal set up called 'patriarchy' does of course damage boys and men too, but it affects girls and woman more.
I am in no doubt that if true equality were to be achieved it would benefit the male of the species too, but that is not the reason why I am a feminist.

JustAnotherPoster00 · 18/12/2016 10:38

Oh please Lweji both taken out of the context they were in, was that the best you could do? Thats a shame

FairNotFair · 18/12/2016 10:41

I actually prefer working with men! No bitching or holding grudges.

Neither of these are uniquely female traits Hmm. I've had over 20 years in male-dominated environments (City of London) that were hotbeds of both.

iloveeverykindofcat · 18/12/2016 10:41

PacificDogwood Right. Patriarchy hurts men, factually, but we don't need to use that to justify the cause. The lives of girls and women are worth fighting for regardless.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 18/12/2016 10:42

Why, OP, would you wander onto another board, have a bit of a mooch around there, read some of the threads, not understand them/like them - and then come onto another board to criticise the first one and what it's about?

Are you usually so short-sighted with no depth of understanding about anything than what usually rattles around in your head?

Your post is rude and obnoxious. There's absolutely no need to blurt out every little thing that doesn't resonate with you.

I don't know if you're a troll or not but you are goady, needy and attention-seeking.

iamadaftcoo · 18/12/2016 10:43

What pacific said.

Arfarfanarf · 18/12/2016 10:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JustAnotherPoster00 · 18/12/2016 10:44

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

Personal insult derailing, the feminist go to

JustAnotherPoster00 · 18/12/2016 10:46

But they benefit from a system that rewards men more than women.

A larger percentage of male offenders than female offenders are sentenced to prison.

Men receive on average longer prison sentences than women

Men serve on average a greater proportion of their sentences.

Yup definate rewards Hmm

GhostOfChristmasYetToCome · 18/12/2016 10:46

Just Except that much of the pay gap stuff comes from the fact that women's opportunity to earn is less because they are the ones expected to take time off for childrearing responsibilities (including time off school for sickness over the years). (Very simplistic, but I cba to go into a lengthy thing)

In the public sector, men and women (as far as I am aware and understand) follow the same pay scales. A male teacher, for example, will earn the same as a female teacher at the starting point. The difference arises when a woman reduces her hours to part time because the family cannot manage with 2 full time workers, and it's just assumed that it will be she who goes part time and not the man. In most families, both partners choose to have the baby, not only the woman, yet it is the woman whose career is affected and whose pay is reduced.

I've never worked in the private sector, so I can't speak for that. But you're talking about it pay being equitable where people get paid the same for the same job. I am aware that, in the private sector, there is a fair amount of 'negotiation' that goes on for payrises etc. Men are more likely to negotiate for pay rises because it's seen as part of the desireable in business Type A personality stuff, whereas a woman will be less inclined to because they are brought up to be 'nice' and women are less well received when they are assertive.

I am aware my post does contain some generalisations, but the reasons they exist as generalisations is because that is generally what happens. We will all know of a man/woman who don't fit the model.

So it's equal opportunities/equality of access in that the barriers to achieving equality of outcome are removed.

user1482025636 · 18/12/2016 10:48

In other words, if you devised an experiment ion which women could administer electric shocks to male captives, some of them would probably start to enjoy it. Even get off on it. There is within most human beings (in fact perhaps buried deep down within us all) the capacity to enjoy humiliating and subjugating others. You only mainly see men doing this because so far they have had all the power.

PacificDogwod · 18/12/2016 10:48

Just, you are not doing yourself or your cause any favours.
That is a statement of fact, not an insult.
Trust me, if I wanted to insult you, you'd know Grin

The pay gap is a myth?
So me earning less than a male colleague of the same age, the same years of professional experience, at the same job for the same number of years is a myth? The difference is, of course, that I had maternity leave. He has had 3 children, but had a wife who took maternity leave. So her earning potential is reduced, her pension will likely be reduced (as is mine). As fas as I know both her DH and mine wanted children.
No fair, is it?

PacificDogwod · 18/12/2016 10:49

I wonder why the largely male judges feel that the male offenders warrant harsher sentences?

Oh wait, they are all nasty feminists Grin

Arfarfanarf · 18/12/2016 10:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JustAnotherPoster00 · 18/12/2016 10:53

Third wave feminists want freedom without responsibility. They want preferential treatment for women while recasting female responsibility as systemic oppression

Thats how I see it, I dont have a cause I really dont and like I've previously said I believe in equality of opportunity not outcome. Of course how dare I not agree so therefore I'm felling rather oppressed now Grin

VeryBitchyRestingFace · 18/12/2016 10:53

The law is very clear. Rape requires a penis.
That isnt nasty feminists. That is the legal view in England. It is not an attack on men.

In England, perhaps.

But the UK (and the world) is not solely comprised of just England. And the law appears to be different in other parts of the UK.