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Original poster

To be so angry with DS's school right now ?

265 replies

TheLaundryLady · 08/12/2016 17:06

Having a crappy week (see thread about friend letting me down) and it just keeps getting worse

DS's school are planning a residential trip to Shropshire next October for his year group.
DS very excited about trip so we complete the paperwork and pay the deposit as requested by the deadline. Paperwork went back about 2 weeks before deadline but due to a glitch with schools parent pay system we didn't pay deposit until the last day of the deadline.

Fast forward to today after being told that he was on the trip I receive a phone call from school telling me that they had messed up and had got the boy/girl ratio wrong and had one boy too many on the trip. Therefore DS will now be unable to go.

I was told that if he was a girl he could still have gone but they chose him not to go because We were last to pay.

Now they have known how many girls and boys are in that year group since reception.

If this was purely first come first serve I would understand but this clearly seems to be about his gender - he can't go because he's a boy.

Head teacher has basically said tough and DS is gutted

OP posts:
HoopsandEverything · 09/12/2016 11:03

WAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

WouldHave · 09/12/2016 11:08

I've read the whole thread and quite shocked no one has pointed out that they aren't allowed to do 'first come first serve' as it is discrimination against families from a lower income who don't have access to funds as easily as families from higher incomes.

Um, I pointed out that one, way upthread.

WouldHave · 09/12/2016 11:09

I'm really pleased they've sorted it out, but astonished that they didn't spot the error weeks ago or whenever they booked the accommodation. Surely it's not difficult to give the venue the correct numbers for boys and girls and book accordingly?

I also suspect that it was your request for policies that rang alarm bells and made them sort this out, so credit to you!

ToadsforJustice · 09/12/2016 11:11

It looks like your request for a meeting with the HT and a list of policies did the trick! Excellent news OP.

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 09/12/2016 11:31

Great news.

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 09/12/2016 11:43

Glad they've sorted it. Suspect asking for the policies and a meeting with the head may have given them a shove in the right direction.

rookiemere · 09/12/2016 11:45

That's such good news OP.

I was really invested in this one as I could imagine how DS would feel had he been excluded, so I'm delighted it's been resolved.

BertrandRussell · 09/12/2016 11:46

All, as it was sorted so early in the day, I suspect that they were trying to sort it anyway. Asking for the policies probably wouldn't have made any difference.

OP- if you asked for a lot of policies you no longer need, could you stand them down to save money on printing?

Jenny70 · 09/12/2016 11:48

And noone else has been bumped off? Hard to believe they would cancel the trip when an easy solution was close at hand - I'd keep the meeting to make sure they realise the anguish this caused and in future years it will be avoided.

Sweets101 · 09/12/2016 11:55

Well done OP.

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 09/12/2016 12:00

If they'd been trying to sort it, why kick one child off the trip before they'd finished and why not tell the OP's DH when he talked to the head.

altiara · 09/12/2016 12:01

Yay! All sorted out by the time I got to the end of the thread. I was going to say my DD went on her y6 trip to a PGL centre and it wasn't until the week before they went that the room allocations/numbers per room were confirmed to the children, up til then they'd been told usually 4 but maybe 3,4 or 5 per room. Not sure on the numbers for the whole centre but sounded big as several schools there at the same time.
So happy it's all resolved, they really love the y6 residential.

DeepanKrispanEven · 09/12/2016 12:07

If they were already trying to sort this out, why would they not have waited an extra day to avoid all this upset? And why would the head not have told OP yesterday that that was what they were doing, instead of telling OP he refused to do anything about it?

It's pretty clear that something or someone has given them a kick up the arse, and quite right too.

Bestthingever · 09/12/2016 12:19

Thank goodness this has been sorted. I felt so sorry for your ds! It is bloody disgraceful that you were told he couldn't go in the first place.

Purpleprickles · 09/12/2016 12:29

Yay glad they saw sense and did the right thing.
Trifle the inclusion policy should be about inclusion of all, so yes a lot of SEND but it should also clearly state that no child should be excluded from activities on the grounds of race, gender etc.

Trifleorbust · 09/12/2016 12:36

Purpleprickles: That isn't exclusion 'on the grounds of gender'. It is exclusion on the grounds of available space, given that students of different genders can't share. I am delighted that this has been sorted but it isn't an issue of gender discrimination.

TitaniasCloset · 09/12/2016 12:57

Hooray!!! So pleased its been resolved, was getting angry for you.

Well done OP!

Starlight2345 · 09/12/2016 12:59

Thank goodness for your DS...

I do think the fact you didn't take it lying down has meant they have been able to resolve it..Like PP said why didn't they just wait a day if they were looking for a way to resolve it.

jellybeanteaparty · 09/12/2016 13:08

I do love a happy ending, thanks for updating. Have a lovely weekend :)

RavioliOnToast · 09/12/2016 13:16

I think a teacher read the thread Grin yay MiniLaundry

5to2 · 09/12/2016 13:27

Our primary used to do "first to get the form in first served" which used to piss off the "power mums" with nannies doing pick up or who only chose the school because of the breakfast and after school clubs...

And also the non-power parents with friends and relations doing pick ups and relying on the child to remember to hand in the form themselves after breakfast club.

The fairest system is a lottery when places are short.

So glad it was resolved, OP. What a relief.

5to2 · 09/12/2016 13:29

And noone else has been bumped off?

I hadn't realised it was that serious! Grin

Topseyt · 09/12/2016 13:37

Great news that it has been sorted out.

Surely this is the type of thing that they should attempt to sort out behind the scenes in the first place, rather than saying to a parent and their child that he would be the only one not to go. It made them look extremely unprofessional, stupid and uncaring about the hurt to the boy's feelings.

If they couldn't have sorted it out (which they did very easily, by the sound of it) then they could have informed parents that due to unforeseen accommodation issues at the centre they would be looking for an alternative and would advise once known. I am no expert in these things, but something along those lines anyway.

Original poster
TheLaundryLady · 09/12/2016 14:51

I don't believe that they were trying to sort anything out otherwise they wouldn't have said anything yesterday.... why cause all of the stress and upset ?

I'm sure that my telephone conversation, DH's conversation with the HT and my request for policies and a meeting changed their minds.

I'm just glad it's all sorted

OP posts:
DeepanKrispanEven · 09/12/2016 15:06

It's gender discrimination if they fail to book enough space for the boys who are eligible to go.

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