Is one type of prostitute 'better' than another?

[MelAncoly]

Woman 1 - heroin addict, prostituing to feed her habit. Stands on street corners and will go with anyone that has the money.

Woman 2 - professional career, no drug habits or alcohol problems, doesn't even smoke. Simply wants extra money as she's saving to buy a house as she wants to get involved in property development. Her full time job doesn't pay enough to save for the kind of house she wants. She finds clients through an escourt agency.

Is there a difference between the two or are they both as bad as each other?

Also would you/have you ever considered it as a way of easy money?

Who was it who said they needed a rating system for clients? There is a form of members-only website set up to help prostitutes report bad clients, where members receive text alerts and support, and can check phone numbers: National Ugly Mugg*

Just, yes of course. Male prostitutes are just as pitiable as female prostitutes, and women who use them are not separate from men. I would hope that goes without saying. I've tried to find some statistics on use but there are none, mainly a Daily Mail article saying it's on the increase and men saying "Oh sure, women can do it but we can't", not "poor men". I would also say that yes, this is one form of lack of real consent, like marital rape is.

DailyCrap: an estimated 90% of sex workers are drug addicts. Many turn to it from homelessness. Another 40% (more in London) are immigrants and don't even speak English.

Most who turn to it and stick with it are desperate and at a low point - so yes, I'd be very sad if a daughter or son turned to it because that would mean they were effectively in crisis. I wouldn't "judge" them for it, it doesn't mean moral corruption.

Even if somehow on a whim they decided "why not? I really fancy getting paid for sex today", I'd feel sorry and want to be there for them to work out how to help. (There but for the grace of god etc.)

There was a poster on the other thread who did it to help pay uni fees and was badly affected by it. It's never as simple as "the good type of prostitution" and "the bad kind".

To everyone who thinks it's fine and this is just bloody feminists on their high horse or something - then have you done it? And if not why?

(And please don't give me the "oh I just don't fancy it but they do" stuff. "They" are not that different inside.)

*...don't even necessarily speak English. (I'm sure some do).

I had no experience of prostitution - thank gawd. Do you really need experience to be say that someone prositutes are not treated well? Is a woman who has sex with several clients in one night being treated as a human being by her pimp?

Comparing marriage to prositution is silly. Husband and wives usually care about each other deeply. It's a relationship that often lasts for many years if not life. A man will stay with his wife when she is too old/ frail for sex. He will visit her in hospital. Even marriages that do end in divorce generally start off with good intentions.

Late to discussion but I person A definitely exists and is the reality of prostitution whereas B is the expectation of people who have read Belle De Jour.

I think those that say there's a moral equivalence between men who pay for sex with a drug addict and those who pay for sex with a 'high class' escort are wrong.

The former are clearly exploitative of very vulnerable women... the latter aren't.

All prostitution is abuse of women. Having a habit just makes it all the harder.
Men who buy women do not treat them well.

'Supermummy'
How is the second exploiting the men?
Do you know what exploit means?
I'm gobsmacked you can compare drunk teenagers flirting for a drink to the abuse prostituted women are subjected to.

All prostitution is abuse of women.

Definitely for desperate drug addicts, but for high end escorts, the interaction is much more equal. It may be sordid and unhealthy, but the man and woman are equally responsible and culpable with high end escorts - both are equally exploitative...

if anyone is forced t sell sex, in desperation, then that is the problem - not the selling of sex per se.

What we need to focus on is decent homes, hope, jobs, tackling poverty and crime and drugs - then the prostitution decreases. There will still be sex used as a part of a transaction but that in itself is not the problem - it is the fact that women are driven to it and the consequent transactions are often terrible for her.

Judging women who have made that choice from a position of desperate need is what is really low; not the choice that they have made.

Who was it who said they needed a rating system for clients? There is a form of members-only website set up to help prostitutes report bad clients, where members receive text alerts and support, and can check phone numbers:

That was me. I am glad that there is something to report bad clients. Obviously still v dangerous, esp as people can change phone number or just pick women up off the street.

Yy Yello. Sorry, I looked for your post but couldn't find it. It's not a perfect system by any means, but it looks like they're trying to do something.

It's also a system that depends on reports of course, and if you're emotionally and physically black and blue, or scared, you might not feel able to.

I would say wanting to sell your body so you can get into property development is sad rather than bad.

I would say wanting to sell your body so you can get into property development is sad rather than bad.

I agree... equally a man who pays for sex with such a woman is also sad rather bad.... and a man who pays for sex with a drug addict is more bad than sad.

Banana - How do you think these men "vet" the women in the "higher" and check why they got into the business, if they're on drugs etc etc?

And do you really think they always treat them brilliantly because they sometimes pay more? Because a quick look on the punter "review" sites tells you that's bollocks.

Neither are bad, morally speaking. I'd say the clients/customers whatever of prostitute 1 are worse than 2's, as she sounds like she has little to no choice and is in a desperate downward spiral.

If you are considering option 2, think long and hard, your self esteem will take a mighty battering even if your body doesn't.

I think all prostitution is bad, bad for the prostitutes and bad for their clients. Lots of risks for the women involved and dangers. Not judging the women who do it, judging 'it', sexual access to people's bodies being sold for money.

A better question would be which is safer. My 'guess' is the later of the two types you describe, but I don't know.

No, I would not do it, unless it was the only way to feed me and my kids.

I have NO JUDGEMENT for women (or men) caught up in prostitution, but it is bad, IMHO, very bad.

"How can sexual consent be a thing that can be bought and sold, yet we can still talk with a straight face about there being such concepts as healthy sexual relationships and meaningful consent? If, while having sex with someone, you feel repulsed by them touching you, afraid of what they might do, degraded and humiliated by the sexual acts, hurt by the hateful words they’re whispering in your ear, sore because he’s the fifth man you’ve had sex with today, exhausted from it all, traumatised, abused – the fact that you’ll get a bit of cash at the end does not change anything. There is no invisible hand in the prostitution market that magically disappears the lived experience of sexual abuse."

and

place all kinds of restrictions and prohibitions on markets precisely because of this. Because the risks, particularly to the most vulnerable and marginalised in society, are just too high. Commercial exchanges that people may agree to participate in without a gun being held to their head – such as sales of human organs, voting rights, bonded labour contracts – are nonetheless deemed legally off limits. It’s the line in the sand that societies draw to say that the harm to those directly involved, to third parties, or to the bedrock principles necessary for equal citizenship, is simply too great. Some trades are too toxic to tolerate.

from...

www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2016/jun/06/prostitution-sex-work-pimp-state-kat-banyard-decriminalisation

Sorry if this has already been linked to before, have not read all replies.

And if you think it is work, what rights have the women/men got?

logosjournal.com/2014/watson/

klassy

If a man doesn't have any scruples about who he is buying sex from, and doesn't care whether they're a desperate drug addict or someone making a lifestyle choice, then yes, they're more 'bad' than 'sad'. And yes, probably many men who go with high class escorts because they prefer the experience fall into this category.

However, there may be men out there who want sex, who for whatever reason struggle to get sex, and are willing to pay someone who they judge isn't a desperate addict but someone actively choosing to escort to improve their standard of living. Yes, they can't be certain, but you can never be certain in life. A man may hook up a woman for consensual sex without payment and he will not know her true motives... I'm not condoning such a man's behaviour, but it's not morally the same as someone who would pay to shag anyone without any regard for them whatsoever.

I don't think "bad" is helpful terminology. I think Woman 1 is far more vulnberable which in itself isn't a good thing

I agree with the PP who said the first is not bad and the second does not exist.

Woman 1 - I would pity
Woman 2 (assuming she exists) - I would assume she is in some way emotionally damaged. If not before then certainly after starting sex work. I would also judge

It's awful that men pay for it either way.

BadKnee Spot on re the first woman, she is the desperate one but little if anything is done to alleviate her plight:(

Referring the business friend i mentioned several posts ago it does seem, from what he tells me, he has no problems with the women he see's, and they don't with him they are all around 25 to 40 odd years old. Seems also he wouldn't want to engage a younger one.

But this issue has been around since very early times, i rather doubt that its going to disappear overnight;!

Sorry meant to add I'm beginning to wonder if some men now see OLD as a source of paid or easy sex, seems that way from the experiences of women posting on OLD threads!

The second type absolutely exists. I don't know how many or what percentage they are but they do exist.

I favour the Burdick model which criminalizes the 'customer' (rightly in my oprnion. This does not mean all prostitution stops but it means the customers have a very big incentive to treat prostitutes well.

The amount of money is really immaterial Ian't it? Can you really put a price on safety, dignity, etc?