Teaching assistant gave 8-yr-old DD a book full of F-bombs

[MiniPharm]

After school yesterday 8-yr-old DD told me that the teaching assistant had given her her personal copy of The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time. DD said the TA had given it to her to keep and that "it has lots of rude words in". I've just looked at the copy on our bookshelves at home and indeed on Page 4 there is a "f*king" and a "f*k", plus plenty more throughout the book. TBH I can't remember that much of the story and whether it is generally suitable for an 8-yr-old. Google tells me that it is on the Suggested Reading List for Yr 8 (KS3 / age 12-13). I don't to overreact but it seems pretty inappropriate / idiotic to give an 8-year-old an adult book without checking with the parents. I personally swear like a trooper but never in front of the kids. I certainly would never allow her to write or say the f-word at home and would be very concerned if she was swearing at school. AIBU / WWYD?

F bomb 😂

I would take the book back into school and have a quiet word with the teacher. I would imagine the teacher will apologise straight away. Then the teacher will speak to the TA.

No blazing guns.

The TA would have thought it was a child's book, not an adult's book so would not have thought to check with parents. It was a silly mistake to make, but a mistake. TAs are humans too. He / she will hopefully learn from this.

If your child is old enough to read it I'd say go for it, it's a fantastic book and proof your 8 year old is a brilliant reader, and therefore a credit to you.
Literature is often littered with profanity, if more people understood what they were reading then Shakespeare would probably require an 18 rating.

Good grief. It is a book, not unexploded ordinance. The words can't leak out and harm her - they are not toxic fumes ready to engulf the poor innocent. She doesn't have to read it!

And, it is a brilliant book. Teaching staff can't do right. She was probably lending a book after a conversation about something (Autism?) to try to explain something.

Lots of people think it is a children's book. Simple mistake. Just take it off her.

I take books off kids I teach (secondary) all the time that are full of sex and profanity. Usually these have been given by the parents, who have made the same mistake. All I can do is call them and say please don't send that book to school

I doubt the TA thought it was a child's book, since it was their own personal copy and said "it has lots of rude words in". So it wasn't a mistake. Personally I think it's very odd and very inappropriate.

I'd want to know why the TA took it upon themselves to lend something like that to an eight year old kid.

It's such a good book. I don't actually remember the swearing in it but might be good chance to discuss language with your child?

It may have been the child who said 'It has lots of rude words in' but fair enough if it was the TA's personal copy - error of judgement. Still only requires a quiet word.

That's an amazing book. As are Maggot Moon and When Mr Dog Bites and Noughts and Crosses and The Fault in our Stars. If you don't want her to read it yet then don't, but I've found kids tend to just giggle or just completely gloss over swearing in books. 8 may be a little young for subject matter in that one.

Wait until Juliet is asking Romeo to take her Maidenhead, or Iago shouts about a black ram tupping a white ewe. Books are full of it!

I would take it as a complement that the teaching assistant thinks her reading level is that of a 12-13 year old. I think 8 years old is old enough to understand not to repeat the words.

I think it would be an excellent opportunity to talk about both language and what autism is with her, from what I remember of the book it's a good portrayal.

No teaching staff can't do right if they are going to give an 8 year old child a book full of swearing. It's not appropriate at all. Obviously do not do as suggested and let her read it. She is 8. A little girl. Let her be one.

A very strange decision for the TA to make. Take it back to the teacher and have a quiet word.

There are two versions of the book - an adult one and a childrens' one. The TA obviously (?doesn't know this and) gave her the wrong version.

I wouldn't want my 8 year old reading Noughts and Crosses or The Fault in Our Stars - both have overt sexual content in them. It's great when a child is advanced in terms of their reading age but that doesn't always correspond to their emotional development.

sorry: children's

It's a good book but not at all suitable for an 8 year old. It will disturb her. Let her be a child.

Absolutely not appropriate at that age. Yes they will be exposed but it can be very confusing to young children if they are given something by someone in authority that makes the swearing seen acceptable. What happens when they get in trouble at school for then using those words.

My DS is autistic & so is dd. DS in particular has been in trouble at school for swearing as he finds it difficult to differentiate between different situations. He is in year 8 aged 12 & I am only just now considering him to be ready to read that book. Dd who is also autistic read it a few years ago (she's year 10)

Yes and with Curious Incident it's not just the language I would have an issue with: there is death, abandonment, alcohol abuse, infidelity and violence to go along with it. I'll stick to the Hans Christian Anderson for a bit

If it was the TAs book then it's a complement to not only your child's level of reading but to their level of maturity that they can read a book with shock horror swearing in and not repeat it. No doubt an 8 year old has come across swearing before and is not going around saying fuck all day!

Seriously, the book is brilliant and the lesson learned from it far outweighs the swearing! If you don't want your child to read it yet then don't but there is no need to go in all guns blazing.

Sorry x post

it sounds like she is already aware that its a rude word and what is and isn't appropriate. I would have the discussion and whilst maybe a little young if she has the reading skill its difficult to find age appropriate books sometimes. It was around then I was reading books first but you can't always do that.

Trifle

Nothing better than your classic children stories. At least there is no swearing

But it's not just the swearing though is it? The whole content of the book is not really suitable for an 8 year old. Isn't the whole centre of the story the revelation that the parents' marriage is distintegrating? Plus there's the murdered dog and all sorts of unsettling events. If the 8 year old understands what is actually going on she'll find it quite unsettling, and if most of it goes over her head she'll just find it confusing and boring. It IS a good book, but not for an 8 year old. So many better and more enjoyable - but still challenging books she could be reading at that age.

You couldnt remember the story and if it was suitable and possibly the TA didnt remember it properly.

Either way, you aren't unreasonable, I would have a quiet mention to the teacher and I am sure it will be sorted.

I think an 8 year old can be told that they can read fuck but not say it . . . but at the same time I wouldn't let my 8 year old read it, although he could. He doesnt hear swearing anywhere so it would be wierd IMO for a book recommendation to be the only place he hears fuck!

You happened to have a copy on your book shelf??

*weird

I agree it is a good book though, one for later