AIBU to wish the school would stop asking me for stuff

[StopAskingForMoney]

So DS1 has nearly completed his first term at school in YR. The school is great, teachers are lovely, they're great 99% of the time the only issues we've really had are minor in the grand scheme of things (letting all the parents turn up to school to then tell them at 9am it's not open due to a 'issue' and to bring them back at 12, to then get a text at 12 saying the school is closed due to a sewer issue they've been trying to fix since 7am, Forgetting to open the school gate because they 'forgot')

The issue is In the last three weeks alone the school has asked for;

Nursery rhyme costume - £12
Donation for nursery rhyme £25
Raffle tickets - £10
Christmas play costume - £20
Non-School uniform donation - £5
Christmas hat and jumper - £15
Raffle tickets again - £2
Parent present buy they're getting the kids to do- £6
Another Christmas fair raffle - £5
Fruit or Veg donations every week

They've also now asked for us to donate things like balance bikes, wheel barrows, lego etc! The money they raised from the school nursery rhyme challenge was going to be used to get something that benefitted all the YR children. They brought a bike shed, just for the YR children, never have I ever seen a YR child ride their bike to school, the majority I'd say at least 80% of the YR parents drive to school, so it doesn't benefit all the children.

There is also talk about donating to the church, Now people are wanting to do a club together to buy the stuff for the teachers.

AIBU to want them to stop asking me for things! I have no money, I don't want my kid to be the only one sticking out but I can't afford it! I don't get why they want money every week for something! It's right on top of Christmas and half the time we'll get a letter in the book bag asking for things to be in by the end of the week, It's stressing me out!

Wtf that sounds ridiculous. What kind of school is it?

That is a shocking amount to be asked for in a full year, never mind s term . We are asked to supply our own costumes for the school play, and they can normally be borrowed or made very cheaply and easily.

Do you live in an affluent area?

Or rather, is the school in an affluent area? Is it a state school?

A normal public school, although I'm starting to think a private school would of been bloody cheaper!

This is school for you. I hate it.

I wouldn't say it's an affluent area, it's a brilliant school don't get me wrong but I dread opening the bookbag in case they're asking for something!

That's mad!!

What would happen if you didn't buy these things?

Those are huge amounts of money. For the donations are those suggested amounts or is that what you have chosen to give?

Could things be purchased more cheaply? From poundstretcher for stuff like the hat and gloves?

Either way I agree that this is absolutely ridiculous

Do you mean state school rather than public school?

That is an awful lot of money they are asking for. What on earth is the £25 nursery rhyme donation?

We live in a "naice" area with an outstanding primary school, but we never received such ridiculous money demands as this. I know schools are vastly underfunded, but it sounds like the school is taking the piss. I would just put my foot down and say enough is enough.

Blimey! All we've had this year is 2 x non uniform at £1 a shot a bake sale (which no one notices if you go or not!) and a decorate a jar and buy it back full of sweets for £1 (again no one notices or cares if you do it)

We've one more non uniform before xmas and this part of the year is more expensive than the other half in my experience. I wouldn't be impressed with a fiver to wear their own clothes! And what's with the rest of it!!

Have you been asked to give these amounts or is that what you've spent? My kids go to a private school and Non uniform day is only ever £1 and I have never spent that much on costumes and things.

That's not normal! Do you have to buy the costumes though? Can't you just cobble something together?

Just say no more - my dd goes to a state primary in an affluent area and a lot of the parents don't contribute to joint teacher gifts or anything else really its strictly voluntary - if you can't afford it, why feel guilty - I wouldn't

That's ridiculous! Are you sure they are requests, not suggestions?

£5 is a huge donation for non uniform. £1 or 50p is more usual.

Christmas hat was card factory! Jumper asda, Nursery rhyme asda again, it's either suggested donation or things like the tickets they ask you to sell that many, Christmas present buy is a set amount.

If I didn't buy them then he'd be the only one today without a Christmas jumper and hat, he'll be the only one in the play without the costume (Same with nursery day) and he'll be the only one in uniform if we don't donate (no donation = wearing uniform) It seems like such a hassle, I'm not doing the all in for the present because quite frankly I can't afford it and they're paid to teach DS1 who apparently all he does is play with lego (I'm sure he does more but when you ask what he's done this is what he says!)

That does seem a lot, especially the nursery rhymes stuff. Though I think some of your list was choice - raffle tickets. And some was clothing that can be worn again - Christmas jumper.
When my dc started school I was really surprised by the sorts of things being bought by the pta (so raffle tickets from your list I guess?) - e.g. Library books, iPads etc implying that without the pta raising this money, these items wouldn't be there for the children to use.

Schools have no money. They are cutting staff, counting pencils, questioning whether the heating needs to be on.

This sort of thing will become more and more common. This year all our pupils are making a Christmas tree decoration as usual, but, for the first time, if they want to take it home their parents will have to buy it.

There was another thread about parents being charged for nativity tickets.

There isn't enough money in the pot.

That seems ridiculous. But you can save money by being creative with costumes and stuff eg Xmas jumper could be a.regular jumper with some tinsel pinned on. For the donations I would give for some and not others if they were this regular. Kids in reception will neither notice or care what you give. £5 for an own clothes day though really??? You can't be the only parent who thinks that's excessive!

They had to sing songs, nearly £1000 and they brought a bike shed

I couldn't make them, like the school play he needs the same colour top and bottoms, headband and checked tea towels can I find the same colour top and bottoms of course not!!

What's the difference between state and public, we've only referred to them as public and private

I'm staggered at the £25 for a nursery rhyme though. That is outrageous.

DD's schools always asked for £1 on non uniform days.

What is this £25 nursery rhyme supposed to do?

sister I understand that, but many parents have no money either, I'd be more accepting if they spent the nursery rhyme money on books, painting/drawing resources but on something at least half the year who donated won't even use it's just frustrating!