Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

But it's OUR drive...

482 replies

amammabear · 22/11/2016 12:11

Our drive is directly opposite the drive of the house opposite, it's a quite, dead end street so not much traffic. When I reverse off if, I turn as I do so that I'm facing the right way on the road and then off I go, the person who lives opposite however (in his perfect BMW with private plates...) doesn't do this. He instead reverses straight across the road, onto OUR drive, then drives off again.

Normally this only annoys me a little, but today, as I was reversing out of our garage I noticed he had his reverse logged on and then started moving so I stopped outside of the garage, on the drive. By the time I'd stopped, I noticed that he was fully back on his own drive. So because he saw I was going to be in his way, instead of reversing properly, onto the road instead of someone else's property, he went back out of reverse, and drove back on.

So being annoyed, I waited. And waited. And the insert name for irritating person here waited too. Eventually I had to leave, shaking my head at him, and watched in my mirrors as he priced he had been specifically waiting for our drive by reversing straight across as usual.

AIBU to be annoyed about this? It's our private property, that we have to pay to buy and maintain? I know it's quite a little thing and it doesn't usually bother me too much more than a minor irritation, but today it really infuriated me.

OP posts:
SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 16:54

To be fair 'occasionally' walking across your garden v reversing onto your driveway every day isn't quite the same - esp if you've got kids or pets who are liable to be on that driveway.

A wee quiet word is the way forward imo. Or land mines.

lasttimeround · 22/11/2016 16:55

Wow. I don't get it. Clearly in the minority but I just don't get it. Why do you care about the x seconds a day his car is on your drive.

MrsKoala · 22/11/2016 16:56

My husband could get some land mines if you are interested. Just give me the Wink

PrivatePike · 22/11/2016 16:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BitOutOfPractice · 22/11/2016 16:59

MrsKoala I may take you up on that as my bastard of a neighbour had the temerity to wave at me cheerily today causing wear and tear to tens of thousands of pounds of my nerves Angry

amammabear · 22/11/2016 17:00

Mrskoala that's brilliant!!!

Lizb62a there is nothing worse than a hypocrite!

Mrswillacather if you'd read my comments you'd know I have a good reason for not reversing on.

And it is actually entirely possible that my kids could be on the drive at three times he does this.

Blimey, I only thought I'd get a handful of comments...

OP posts:
SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 17:03

OP - MN parking/driveway threads last for ages. Childen are conceived, born and go off to university in the time it takes us to debate the unjustness v overreaction of the drivers involved Grin

MrsK - how much for a small one? Or is the first one free?

MrsKoala · 22/11/2016 17:09

It's not the cost of the land mine you need to worry about. It's the hundreds of thousands of pounds you need to rebuild your drive every time a cat wanders across it.

EweAreHere · 22/11/2016 17:09

So glad we have room on our shared drive to turn the car around and drive straight out without faffing about with backing in or out of drive.

(misses point of post)

amammabear · 22/11/2016 17:13

SirChenjin I had NO idea...

Ewe I have drive envy now...

OP posts:
SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 17:14

If I put a landmine either side of the driveway then I won't need to worry about the cat stepping on it. Either that or I just shoot it on site

SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 17:15

Sight even - my garden isn't big enough to be a site

amammabear · 22/11/2016 17:16

Dammit SirChenjin I thought you were onto the perfect method of cat riddance then...

OP posts:
Owllady · 22/11/2016 17:18

Have you got a monopoly set? I'd pop the community chest card through his letterbox
GO TO JAIL: Go directly to Jail. Do not pass Go. Do not collect £200
I've said this to someone mid argument before and it worked, so I'm sure the card will do the same

EwanWhosearmy · 22/11/2016 17:18

I'd had my new car for less than a month when I got up to find a massive great dent in the back of it. From the height of the dent it could only have been a large van reversing into it.

Neighbours swore blind it was nothing to do with them, despite having regular visitors with vans to their house, but after that I really noticed how many people use other people's drives to manouever.

My new car was just that bit bigger than the old one and I stopped in the same place on my drive. Looks like van driver had been in the habit of using our drive and didn't notice that the car was further back than usual. When you do something regularly you get complacent.

Cost me my excess, huge inconvenience, accident against me on my insurance, all because some knob can't drive the vehicle he's in.

MrsKoala · 22/11/2016 17:18

Oh come on SirCh what if the crap in your garden? Surely by mn rules you are obligated to explode them, either that or seeth silently and post about it while giving yourself an ulcer.

SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 17:27

Fair point MrsK - the cat shit is pretty revolting. OK, blown to kingdom come it is then. MIAOWWWW Grin

Witchend · 22/11/2016 17:29

I'm glad I live in a neighbourhood where people don't mind about such things.
My opposite neighbour doesn't mind if I go onto their drive when turning round (we have a very awkward angle drive). They occasionally back into our drive to turn around.
We've just had a skip on our drive for a fortnight to help a neighbour out who didn't have anywhere easy to put it (their house is behind ours, down a walkway).
Another neighbour occasionally asks if when they have visitors they can park on our drive. If I/they need to get out we move the car.
Another neighbour came round with a large number of packets of biscuits when they had a family visiting who works at the factory.
Another neighbour took ds for a spin in her brand new just delivered convertible car because she saw him goggling at it.
I've had a knock on my door and found newly baked cakes.
Someone brought a parcel round that was delivered wrongly-three streets away.
Someone who lives round the back of us, whose name I don't even know, knocked on the door and offered him an ice cream. We'd passed her at the shops and she'd heard me say I didn't have enough money for an ice cream. She had just bought a packet with 4 in but only had 3 grandchildren coming round.
We take in parcels, keep an eye on houses when away, take each others' bins out and put them away again.
This is the "unfriendly" south east-and not a village either.

I'm glad I live in my world, not yours.

chaoticmum2b · 22/11/2016 17:35

Ha ha, I now know why my neighbour parks overhanging his driveway as my husband used to swing slightly into his drive to reverse into ours. Otherwise it is near-on impossible to reverse onto the drive. Thought he was being petty!

Maybe he's unaware that the previous owner extended the driveway past his boundary, making what was already a tiny unadopted road between the driveways even narrower.

I'm a recently passed driver and as my other neighbours leave their bins out near our boundary I don't feel comfortable reversing in.

I would never consider either of us arrogant (as some people seem to suggest this behaviour is), far from it. I just don't see how someone darting onto your driveway (carefully) for a few seconds can cause people that much grief!!

chaoticmum2b · 22/11/2016 17:37

Your neighbourhood sounds nice Witchend!

mya83 · 22/11/2016 17:39

.

amammabear · 22/11/2016 17:39

You're missing the point witchend, using the example of the skip, surely they asked? Surely you'd be pretty miffed if they didn't?.

Actually, parcels, sharing cake etc, that happens all the time around here (i've just collected a parcel from a neighbour who is happy to have them left with her, when Santa came round last year one of our neighbours brought out trays of cake for us all, i organise a Christmas caroling session for us all...). I don't understand how you even think that's relevant?

Although, interestingly, as you mention it, these particular neighbours never take parcels in and never join in with community events, so perhaps in trying to say that I'm miserable, what you've actually done is shown me that they are... I reiterate, if they asked, and had a good reason, I wouldn't care!

OP posts:
Blueisnotforglue · 22/11/2016 17:41

It's my life mission to turn around on every driveway I see which has some petty little englander sign telling me not to.

Seriously just why? What on earth does it take away from you? How does it affect you? Why would you even give headspace to someone being on your driveway for 5 seconds a day?

Imagine you go and ask him to stop and then he does....you can't ever ask him for any help in an emergency, power cut, anything at all.

SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 17:42

Witch - presumably much of that 'help your neighbour' stuff is done once you've asked first or because you all speak to each other and are on neighbourly terms? That's the way we do it here - we speak, communicate, never assume. The OP has only described one specific incident (which would actually piss me off, even in my neighbourly Utopia) - you can't extrapolate from that one thing that they live in a miserable little world (well, you could, but it would be baseless)

amammabear · 22/11/2016 17:44

Blue they wouldn't help anyway. I used to smile at them in passing but it was never returned, they refuse parcels if delivery men knock (i've seen it happen) they don't join in with any community stuff, and the only time I've ever spoken to him is when he's randomly complained at us. Yet he thinks it's ok to use our drive... A little community spirit from them might have made all the difference.

OP posts:
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.