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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

But it's OUR drive...

482 replies

amammabear · 22/11/2016 12:11

Our drive is directly opposite the drive of the house opposite, it's a quite, dead end street so not much traffic. When I reverse off if, I turn as I do so that I'm facing the right way on the road and then off I go, the person who lives opposite however (in his perfect BMW with private plates...) doesn't do this. He instead reverses straight across the road, onto OUR drive, then drives off again.

Normally this only annoys me a little, but today, as I was reversing out of our garage I noticed he had his reverse logged on and then started moving so I stopped outside of the garage, on the drive. By the time I'd stopped, I noticed that he was fully back on his own drive. So because he saw I was going to be in his way, instead of reversing properly, onto the road instead of someone else's property, he went back out of reverse, and drove back on.

So being annoyed, I waited. And waited. And the insert name for irritating person here waited too. Eventually I had to leave, shaking my head at him, and watched in my mirrors as he priced he had been specifically waiting for our drive by reversing straight across as usual.

AIBU to be annoyed about this? It's our private property, that we have to pay to buy and maintain? I know it's quite a little thing and it doesn't usually bother me too much more than a minor irritation, but today it really infuriated me.

OP posts:
MissVictoria · 22/11/2016 16:07

Some people honestly just aren't very good/confident at turning whilst reversing. If you've never told him it bothers you and asked him not to do it, how is he to know it's a problem? If he's lived there longer than you it may be the previous owner was ok with it and he genuinely hasn't considered it's an issue for you?
If he refuses to stop and you're feeling particularly petty, film him doing it and report him for trespassing on private property.

MrsKoala · 22/11/2016 16:11

DS (4) is obviously of the same mind as you lot, we just got home and there were some children walking along our front wall and jumping off and he stood in front of them with his arms wide and told them to get off his wall. Then as they ran off he said loudly, 'i don't like those boys'. Perhaps you should do that OP. Grin

Ifailed · 22/11/2016 16:16

some children walking along our front wall and jumping off
Did this wall cost hundreds of thousands of pounds as well?

I suggest this:

But it's OUR drive...
AcrossthePond55 · 22/11/2016 16:18

I know that parking/driveway issues are regarded very differently in the UK vs the US. But I honestly just don't get it in this case. If you had a gravel drive that needed constant raking or if he was spinning brodies or revving his engine in the drive or if reversing put him directly under a window (i.e. a noise or 'peeking in' problem) I could see it. But simply because he dares let his tyres touch the paving of your drive? I certainly wouldn't want to create a bad relationship with a neighbour simply because he was touching something that was 'mine'.

Any normal driveway material certainly isn't going to 'wear out' simply because an extra set of tyres runs on it, that's foolish.

confuugled1 · 22/11/2016 16:18

A little boy locally was killed recently because his neighbour ran over him on their shared drive because he wasn't driving carefully and apparently he didn't like the fact that kids played on the drive.
Completely horrific and gruesome and horrible and completely unnecessary and tragic.

Would definitely not want another neighbour reversing unnecessarily onto my drive, especially if I had kids.

BitOutOfPractice · 22/11/2016 16:18

Who should she report him for trespass to MissVictoria?

LizB62A · 22/11/2016 16:22

There's a man in my road who doesn't like people using his driveway to turn around, so he keeps a cone in it.
Which would be ok, except when he gets back from work, he drives 2 houses down, uses someone else's drive to turn around then comes back, moves the cone and drives up onto his drive.

So it's not ok for people to use his drive to turn around, but it is ok for him to use someone else's drive to turn around.
!!

BitOutOfPractice · 22/11/2016 16:24

But configure the op hasn't said that kids playing there is an issue. Plus she herself is reversing on her drive. If that were a concern, then she shouldn't reverse either.

sparechange · 22/11/2016 16:26

BTW lots of young children are injured or killed by reversing cars on driveways. A visiting child in the garden could be at risk

This is just 100% made up scaremongering nonsense though

booklooker · 22/11/2016 16:26

Wouldn't a 'perfect BMW' have a rear view camera? Making it much less likely to hit or run over anything than the 'clapped out Vauxhall'?

I still can't see the issue. Reversing straight back is far simpler and safer than reversing round bend.

I don't know why you do not use his drive in a similar manner and then find out that you are both quite neighbourly

SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 16:33

Less likely but not impossible. My neighbour reversed into something which didn't show on her screen - and I knocked over my neighbours little boy once when my back parking sensors didn't pick him up. Gave me (and him) the fright of my life.

likepeasandcarrots · 22/11/2016 16:35

It would drive me mad, I'd put a nice thick chain up, he may not see it and try to reverse into your drive and scratch his car. I bet he won't do it again!

PollyPerky · 22/11/2016 16:35

I'd just talk to him first OP.
My elderly parents had this issue with neighbours who parked on the road in front of their house (seemingly incapable of parking their 4 x 4 in their own narrow drive) and would reverse quite a way down my parent's driveway, dragging loads of their stone chippings onto the footpath each time.
Parents talked to them and they stopped.

MrsKoala · 22/11/2016 16:35

Two words. Land mines.

PollyPerky · 22/11/2016 16:36

Book- not all cars BMW or otherwise have cameras. Most have sensors but not cameras.

ShelaghTurner · 22/11/2016 16:38

This would really wind me up. I'd be installing a row of anti-BMW spikes asap. Surely such a product exists...

SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 16:38

I don't think B & Q sell land mines MrsK - or if they are strictly legal. Bastarding health and safety.

MrsDesireeCarthorse · 22/11/2016 16:42

Is everyone also ok with neighbours walking across their gardens then? Because, you know, it's only fleeting and won't cause any wear and tear.

It's someone else's private property. Regularly going onto it without their permission is just rude.

booklooker · 22/11/2016 16:45

Book- not all cars BMW or otherwise have cameras. Most have sensors but not camera

But this wasn't any old BMW, this was a perfect one!

MissWillaCather · 22/11/2016 16:46

YABothBU for not reversing into your drives instead of out of them.

It really annoys me when people do this:makes no sense, and is rubbish to reverse out on to a road.

MrsKoala · 22/11/2016 16:47

It's pc world gone mad SirCh. It's got to the point where someone can fleetingly reverse on your drive and you can't even shoot them. What has the world come to?

splendide · 22/11/2016 16:49

I would be ok with this and yes also ok with a neighbour walking across my garden, why not?

BitOutOfPractice · 22/11/2016 16:49

My neighbour sometimes walks across the edge of my front garden to get to his front door. Again, it doesn't bother me. Because it's no skin off my nose. And he's so far not eaten my sandwiches. So all is well.

SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 16:52

It's gone to the dogs MrsK Sad

The day that they decided to recall plutonium from the shelves at Tesco was the day that I knew we'd all gone far too PC.

MrsKoala · 22/11/2016 16:53

The postman steps over the low wall between the two houses and walks over our garden to get to our front door. Doesn't bother me.

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