To ask you what you call farts

[beautifulbizarre]

They were trumps in our house but now that has been sullied due to Donald.

What can we call them?

Sorry - confusing comment. I know that they are not popping poos but the idea still goes through my head.

Farts
Pumps
Trump's

If the kids fart they are a 'pumper trumper'

Doing a Donald

We parp, he parped and she's parping.

I hate pump - it seems such a wrong use of a word

Farts and trumps are ok

Farts, rudies (my DS), creaky floorboards, wee ducks, windy blows and ifs a bad one which no one heard/claims 'who opened their lunch box' jeez we've a lot of names for them

Anal announcement (which I feel sure comes from Johnny Fartpants in Viz).

Normally in our house if there is slight big smell of effluent

'Who's shit?'

'Yours if you want it'

Boom tish!!

Trump. Donald is so well named!

When my DD was small, if she farted we used to say "More tea, vicar?"

She said it to my MIL one day. MIL choked on her cuppa

Trouser Coughs

Barking Spiders

Grandmother used hate us saying the word fart thought it was rude she told us to call them windy pops

Pimps!

We say WindyPops!
DH likes to say 'shot a bunny' but as we all love bunnies we hate him saying that.
Dd (6) has recently discovered the word fart and seems to love it! We don't really like it which makes her say it even more!

Trumps or farts...or tooty puffs if we're being very silly

We say fart / rude bumz / trump / fartigans / Lady Fartington / Lord Fartington / smelly hole / farty pants / Trip to Trumpton (farting marathon).

Can't believe fart is considered a rude word in some homes. Bollocks is not even thought to be a swear word in my house...

To the person above who asked if 'pump' was Scottish, well I am Scottish and had never heard 'pump' till my Kentish MIL said it.

New shoes
Guffs
Keffs
Boffs
Eggy boffs

Cut the cheese

DS (19) calls them a 'knicker sneeze.'

My dw is medical (I'm not) so I tend to say I've got a touch of flatulence or flatus. This seems to annoy her as much as the fart itself. Btw, I never fart in front of my wife; I always let her go first.

They will always be trumps!

We call them fluffetts in our house! My dd is 2 😍

We call them trumps

Spider barks.

Donalds

Just as you said op call it a fart. Mum used to insist on passing wind when we're children but ive always found it a bit twee and up until she had a grandson would still correct me at 34! I think now with a boy will get used to the fact that boys like to fart or trump or whatever they decide they find is the funniest word!