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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this man was rude on flight?

424 replies

Lionking1981 · 01/11/2016 23:10

On long haul night flight yesterday. My 5 year old would not fall asleep as she was quite excited and enjoying watching all the cartoons. After 5 hours, I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer and drifted off. I was awakened by the man infront shouting 'oh for fucks sake' and throwing his headphones on the floor. I realised my daughter had been kicking his chair, I apologised, got my child to apologise but he didn't even answer - just threw a glare and turned round. I of course stayed awake for the rest of the flight to make sure she didn't do it again. At the end of the flight, he stood up and said loudly that that was the last time he will ever fly with the cattle class. I know I should have theoretically made sure she did not kick his chair and I know it is annoying but surely this was just bloody rude ?

OP posts:
sparepantsandtoothbrush · 01/11/2016 23:26

Reread op, your child is 5, wtf are you doing falling asleep? They could get anywhere, block a loo, cause an obstruction, go missing, upturn the food trolley, get food spilt on them, knock over an elderly passenger with mobility issues.

Hahaha are you serious?

electricflyzapper · 01/11/2016 23:27

Sorry, x posted with you troublesmith. I think you are unreasonable to expect the parent to stay awake and the list of things you say the child could get up to is ridiculous. I doubt she was in the aisle seat and any attempt to get up would have woken the parent.

AmeliaJack · 01/11/2016 23:29

Lionking well clearly he shouldn't have sworn in front of a child.

However at 5 yo she is old enough to know better and also to understand cause and effect - if you behave badly other people get upset and sometimes behave badly too.

As far as bad behaviour goes it about even.

SpookyPotato · 01/11/2016 23:29

I think he was being passive aggressive and I can't stand that, just be direct if you're pissed off. But he's wasn't unreasonable for feeling like that, it is so annoying. I had a little girl kick my chair on the last flight I went on and I was patient as the mum did keep stopping her, but it's one of those things you can't ignore and can't relax when it's happening..

HillaryFTW · 01/11/2016 23:30

The swearing was bad but he may have been jolted awake after just drifting off.

The cattle class comment is pure British PA.

Troublesmith · 01/11/2016 23:31

Spare, yes completely serious.

Ive got children. Ive travelled long haul. I have politely but firmly reprimanded kids for kicking my seat, while dad sits oblivious reading the broadsheets because its the cabin crews responsibility to control kids.

No it is not.

They are your kids, Control them, if you cant don't be surprised when other poeple aren't prepared to indulge your childs boisterous behaviour. Why should they?

Only1scoop · 01/11/2016 23:33

He was probably annoyed that you were sleeping and he was being kicked.

Only1scoop · 01/11/2016 23:34

I've seen passengers be far more rude than that in similar situations.

Troublesmith · 01/11/2016 23:36

Why shouldnt you stay awake on a flight with YOUR child. I am not reponsible for your child, no one is reponsible for your child except you. If you can't be repsonsible for the entire flight, fly with someone else, or don't fly ffs.

You don't walk to tbe high street, take a nap on a park bench and expect everyone to make sure your child is returned to you 40 minutes later?!

It is no different on a plane.

Grow up

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 01/11/2016 23:38

I have politely but firmly reprimanded kids for kicking my seat, while dad sits oblivious reading the broadsheets because its the cabin crews responsibility to control kids.

But that's not what happened here. The OP fell asleep because she was knackered and the man in question didn't politely reprimand the child.

expatinscotland · 01/11/2016 23:39

My son kicks seats. So we pay extra to sit in the bulkhead.

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 01/11/2016 23:41

Oh FFS. Parents get tired, they fall asleep when they're tired. What's wrong with one adult waking another and saying 'excuse me but your child is kicking my seat can you ask them to stop?' rather than getting shitty. If OP had then said "nah fuck off its the cabin crews problem" it might be a different story

Pluto30 · 01/11/2016 23:42

He's paid for a flight and had a miserable time. He's right to be pissed off.

YABU for falling asleep. Sorry, but it's not other peoples' job to monitor your child.

user1471468700 · 01/11/2016 23:43

YANBU Why couldn't the man just turn around and ask the child nicely not to kick his seat?? Surely easier than making himself look like an aggressive, arsey tit!

EssentialHummus · 01/11/2016 23:43

spare, he might've, while the OP slept. We'll Never Know.

Scrumptiousbears · 01/11/2016 23:44

Man - Maybe swearing wasn't necessary
Kid - Badly behaved
You - Tired and massively entitled.

Sorry OP but not everyone has to consider the needs of your child but you. Man was clearly pissed off and you have no idea what his situation was.

Troublesmith · 01/11/2016 23:46

If you can not guarantee your child will not kick seats, get under seats, throw food, kick seats, or you can not guarantee to stay awake, or book for seats at the bulkhead, you can guarantee you will piss someone off.

Rather than ask us to try harder to be more understanding, why don't you??

There are nervous flyers, people travelling with injuries or post operative, bereavements, divorces, return trip from dropping kids with the exDH.

It is not all about your 5 yr old. Get over yourself

m0therofdragons · 01/11/2016 23:46

Wow I'm very anti swearing in front of dc but seriously, how dare you allow your dc to kick the chair in front. So rude! I have 2 five year olds btw. I would have been apologising profusely and telling dc off, but no instead you complain angry man was rude - he was rude because you allowed your dc to be beyond annoying.

electricflyzapper · 01/11/2016 23:46

Of course the op is responsible for her child. I am responsible for my children but guess what, I am still going to go to sleep now, even though I am the only adult in the house tonight. Gosh I hope they don't get out of the house, take a knife the paintwork of the neighbour's car, strangle a cat or knock down an old lady....

IceMaiden73 · 01/11/2016 23:47

YABU

I think he was calm considering

user1477282676 · 01/11/2016 23:48

He was RUDE! He should have turned around and asked your child not to do it or told the staff to ask her. Then they would have woken you up politely.

Having said that...you just can't go to sleep while your DD watches cartoons on a flight. Not ok. You sleep when she's gone off.

Original poster
Lionking1981 · 01/11/2016 23:48

Just to clarify here. My child was in the window seat with her seat belt on happily watching Spongebob. I couldn't have been snoozing for any more than 20 minutes as I had been keeping an eye on the map. I know I should not have drifted off but he could have been more polite about it - is swearing infront of a small child deemed to be acceptable now?

OP posts:
honeyrider · 01/11/2016 23:48

OP your child was being a brat kicking his seat and at 5 was well old enough to be expected to behave herself.

leaveittothediva · 01/11/2016 23:49

Your kid is 5. Your child should really be better behaved. No one could put up with a child constantly kicking their seat. Maybe he noticed you were asleep, and that's what enraged him. It would me. He was rude, but maybe with good reason.

Tomorrowillbeachicken · 01/11/2016 23:50

Personally I think you should be supervising your child. The kicking would drive me bat crap crazy.