To Be Upset That My Alledged Best Friend Has Invited My Ex-H Over For Sups?

[OhCallistoSolo]

Looking for some perspective here as I really don't know if I'm being unreasonable or not.

I haven't been invited by my best friend for supper (or anything else for that matter) since January. My ex-h has been invited twice that I know of, and the other couple we all see have been regular visitors. My best friend, with and without her husband, has been for sups with me countless times. Every time she comes over she tells me that she must invite me round for sups. Am I being over-sensitive to feel really upset that my ex-h gets and invite when I don't?

"Tups 'n' sups" could become a thing.

Like "Netflix 'n' chill" for the Rutshire brigade.

I love this! I'm going to start using it.

Fenella I also love your mother! Get her to start a thread and we can all ask her questions about etiquette and tisanes and things.

OP I'm assuming you're gone, but if not, talk to your friend. Tell her it upsets you.

But it does sound as though she's "picked" him, which is shit. Does your ex have a new partner? So it's a couple thing?

No-one said that she was a saint. While
I don't agree with her sentiment like I said I think she was just biting back against all of the bullying sheep on here and she did it in a far more erudite way than most of the criticism against her choice of words.

Talking issue with the way an op chooses to articulate herself is the new having a pop at someone's grammar, which is now looked down on by almost everyone. It's become an 'in joke' which mean-girl type bullies can ostracise new posters who are seeking support. You should all be thoroughly ashamed of yourselves.

Maybe your friends husband likes socialising with your ex so invites him over for dinner? I would be hurt and would have sent something before now.

Its difficult when couples breakup in terms of who gets to keep the friends, maybe your best friend thinks that she is doing the best thing by keeping you as a girl friend but your Ex as a couple friend?

How about approaching this from a light hearted way? when you are arranging to see other next say that its her turn to host, you have cooked and hosted every other time this year.

I just assumed supper meant dinner - a formal evening meal to her - context wise that makes sense.

Bit then I've live in many place in UK - and have a family who different members use Mom, Mum and Mam and even Mother - though that's often in jest or censure - and may not use them consistently but vary on who they are around.

I haven't seen OP remarks - but from other comments they don't sound nice.

I think some of the somewhat holier-than-thou posters who are piling on to shriek about bullying probably didn't witness how after only a few responses (most of which were either being amused by or mildly baffled by 'sups', as 'supper' for many people is a cup of tea and a biscuit at bedtime, which would change the context of the OP considerably), the OP made a particularly foul and foul-mouthed, classist statement based on a set of incredibly unpleasant underclass/regional stereotypes.

Yep. I'm assuming that an awful lot of people are not aware of that, It was one of the goadiest comments I've ever seen on MN and pretty much gave the game away that the whole purpose of the thread (and the OP's specific choice of wording) was to initiate a class-warfare bunfight.

My best friend calls it 'sups'. She also calls Hong Kong "Honkers" which i find highly amusing. I wind her up by inviting get over for some 'scran'.

There was absolutely nothing erudite about her comment Restless
It's what led me to believe she needed an application of Veet.

I don't agree with her sentiment like I said I think she was just biting back against all of the bullying sheep on here and she did it in a far more erudite way than most of the criticism against her choice of words

Did we read the same comment? There was nothing particularly 'articulate' about it, it was pure stereotyping and demonisation of the working class, and as such rather self-revealing. (And is articulate insult somehow more OK?)

And her post was early on p 2 of the thread, from what I remember, so in fact most of the more snide posts were in response to her thoroughly nasty remark, and not the cause of it.

'Her' over.

at her comment being "erudite", it didn't even make sense.

Sorry, 'erudite' rather than 'articulate'. Not that it was either.

Here's a definition of the word for you. If you really think what she wrote was erudite then that says an awful lot about you and your values.

Erudite:
having or showing great knowledge or learning.
"Ken could turn any conversation into an erudite discussion"
synonyms: learned, scholarly, well educated, knowledgeable, well read, widely read, well versed, well informed, lettered, cultured, cultivated, civilized, intellectual;

Sups is akin to moist and gusset, nasty word.
Very humourous thread ! 😄

erudite? She didn't know the difference between 'then' and 'than'. In the words of Indigo Montoya, "you keep using this word. I do not think it means what you think it means"

MadMags you really couldn't make her up, bless her! A recent gem has also been "what on earth were her parents thinking, calling her Lavinia, if she were to grow up to be an estate agent?!" when said Lavinia turned up to value her house, and then there was the classic "Darling I'm not sure that dress was the best choice. I do think the other one was far more refined." WHEN I WAS IN THE DRESS, ON MY WEDDING DAY.

Can someone enlighten me as to what a "sink estate" is?

I assume a social housing estate? But I don't get the "sink" bit? I grew up in social housing and really don't get it?

I thought the invitation to "kitchen sups" in Jilly Cooper was from an annoying character you were supposed not to like. Drew's wife in Polo, was it? Was she called Sukey? Anyway she was supposed to be irritatingly sloaney, very pleased with her alice bands and her kicthen sups as opposed to bohemian sexy Daisy.

Oh come on. The OP was not erudite at all*

*The OP wasn't real, either, let's face it. So it doesn't matter that they didn't get advice on their situation - they did get an argument, although not the class war that they wanted, and the thread was actually quite funny, so at least it was humorous trolling and not the awful photos/children/sensitive type.

Can everyone stop having a go at special brew please? DP and I started drinking it last year and loved it, we're starting a campaign to get hipsters drinking it in an ironic way so that it becomes socially acceptable again. STOP RUINING THIS FOR US. DO YOU WANT US TO BE CONFINED TO BUS SHELTERS?! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?! WE'RE MIDDLE CLASS!!

A sink estate is where all the inhabitants drink Special Brew and smoke 40 days a day, rather than feed their children. Apparently.

40 fags a day, not days a day. This Special Brew is strong!

Armysal - is the rent cheap in these places?! (Runs off to check rightmove)

A sink estate is a British council housing estate characterised by high levels of economic and social deprivation. Such estates are not always high crime areas although there is a strong correlation between crime rates and sink estates in large urban areas.

Sink estate - Wikipedia
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sink_estate

It tends to conjurer up the TV cop show bill in my mind - large council flat estates inner city ridden with crime and drugs.

Last place we live had a sink secondary school as catchment - it was rural town and though a deprived area by Local Gov stats was actually very mixed with lots of private housing and primaries worked hard for decent results and crime rate wasn't really high - but definitely sink secondary even name nationally and shamed at one point just not an inner city place like the stereotype.

Thanks MrsGwyn. Not sure what to think about that really!

Keep on justifying the bullying behaviour on here, and actually it doesn't matter to me whether the op is a troll or not. Add this to the numerous threads where the word 'hubs' is leapt on then it really does show this website in a particularly nasty light. What it really says is "you're not one of us, you don't use the right words so actually we don't give a shit about your problems".