Part of the problem goes back to this idea of rapists only being ugly men in trench coats waiting in the bushes with a knife. Which then perpetuates the myth that you can keep yourself safe from them by not walking home alone, not getting drunk.
That there are always 'bad people', out there and that's just an inevitability, which shifts the responsibilty on to women to 'keep themselves safe'.
Of course whst all this ignores is that the majority of rapists aren't waiting in the bushes. They are normal blokes, people's boyfriends, husband's, friends, father's. They walk among us every day. And that there isnt a whole lot a woman can do to avoid being raped if she comes across a rapist, short of ceasing to be a woman.
There are precisely zero messages to men about how not to be a rapist because everyone is like 'well obviously that's ridiculous because don't be a rapist goes without saying'. But the fact is the overwhleming evidence is that is doesnt just 'go without saying'.
I read something on here where someone said that women can't win - if we try and take measures to 'keep ourselves safe' (anything beyond not getting too drunk or walking alone down dark alleys) we get criticised because 'not all men' and we get men holding up cards saying 'this is not what a rapist looks like'. But if we don't, then its our fault if we get raped. Unless we are teetotal virgins, which may let us off the hook in some cases.