Vegetable substitutes for carbs are crap

[GinSoakedBarroomQueenInMemphis]

Courgetti and carrotetti or whatever it's called instead of pasta = crap.

Sweet potato fries instead of chips = crap. (Not sure if sweet potatoes are a vegetable, but it's irrelevant. They're still crap.)

Mashed cauliflower instead of mashed potato = crap.

Cauliflower rice = crap.

Mashed celariac instead of mashed potato = double crap.

I'm most outraged with cauliflower. I love cauliflower when it's in its rightful place (on a roast dinner WITH ROAST POTATOES or in a curry), but mash it with sour cream and garlic, and it turns into devil vomit.

I'm not even being unreasonable. Potatoes and pasta and rice are lovely. Carb wish-you-were vegetables are just a huge massive vomity and expensive disappointment.

“The best way to cut carbs from your diet is to make creative substitutions,” says Irritating Chirpy Clear-Skinned Slim Nutritionist.
Oh, bog off.

I don't use these things as a carb substitute - more a way to get more veg in my diet and often I just don't want piles of steamed veg with my dinner so adding it creatively is a good way of doing it. I love cauliflower rice fried with onions and garlic. Courgetti that you get in the shop is slimy and horrible but if you make it yourself (I have a spiraliser) it is lovely.