To think that buying "stuff" is getting out of hand?

[LunaLoveg00d]

Let me preface by saying I am not a lentil knitting vegan eco-warrior. I buy stuff, I drive, I fly abroad on holiday and we don't grow our own food.

However. Since I have had my first child - only 13 years ago - the culture of buying "stuff" seems to have boomed and I don't think it's positive. Supermarkets and other shops are full of (mainly plastic) tat which people are encouraged to buy for every festival imaginable - Valentine's, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Easter, New Year, Christmas, Halloween - the list is endless.

You can't just have a pumpkin lantern for Halloween any more - you have to have fairy lights, cupcake cases, scary decorations, glow in the dark skeletons, adult AND child costumes, bunting, paper chains, etc etc etc. And nearly everything sold is poor quality or designed to be used once or twice and thrown away.

Clothing is the same - chains like the supermarkets, Primark, New Look or H&M are all about churning out clothes as cheaply as possible, designed to be worn for a few weeks or months and then chucked.

It's just all so wasteful and crazy. We are filling up landfills at a rate of knots with all of our plastic crap and disposable clothing and teaching our kids that celebrating festivals and special days isn't about being nice to each other or spending time making or finding a special gift, it's about buying as much "stuff" as you can as cheaply as you can and then chucking it out when you're finished.

All a bit depressing really.

"What I remember from childhood Christmasses was making paper chains with my sister or getting the same box of decorations out each year. Not rushing to the supermarket to buy all new stuff."

Yes, but my grandparents marvelled at all the stuff we had in the 80s because they'd been given 'an apple, an orange and a lump of coal'.

" I wouldn't want to wear the same clothes for years,"

Rotate things? I'm currently wearing a black dress I've had for at least 15 years. The style still works now, but I haven't worn it every month for all those years.

" Same for my home, it would feel tired and outdated with the same rugs/cushions/curtains year after year."

Moving things around at home can make it look different without having to buy everything new.

yanbu. (just deleted a long waffly rant)

everyone doing a bit less towards consuming uneeded stuff/energy may help. a balance. eg, not using the car to pop to the shops for milk, 5 min walk away, but still having a car for the supermarket shop. etc.

chains like the supermarkets, Primark, New Look or H&M are all about churning out clothes as cheaply as possible, designed to be worn for a few weeks or months and then chucked.

We buy clothes from these places and most ware very well ( though don't tend to tumble dry much)- and many last till children out grow and mine and DH clothes usually have to last years.

Occasionally you get a article of clothing that just crap - Primark is somewhere you have to be careful what you buy and I had trousers from peacock that last only a month before holes appeared. But IL buy the children more upmarket clothes and they often don't despite heavy price tag have the quality in the fabric or the seams.

I quite like cheap clothes for the children - but then I grew up with knitted jumpers that itched like made - I react to wool - and home made dresses that marked me out and not in a good way.

Despite this I do think you have a point. ( Though I like the cheap Halloween stuff - though that gets reused a lot as well)

We used to with our toddler and young children do the library and park on a Saturday morning - every week we got asked if we were going shopping in town with a look of bemusement when we said no.

It was it shopping was the only acceptable leisure activity to do as a family.

Yanbu

though the compulsive shoppers are rather good news for the rest of us who don't mind if we wear the same top for 5 years or sit on the same sofa for 20+

my MIL was a complete sucker for anything new and shiny

as a result, I do not foresee the need to buy any more bedding for the rest of my life, to buy any tops or skirts for the next 3 or 4 years, or for new dining room chairs or crockery to be bought for the next couple of generations

I hope the users of the local charity shops are similarly pleased with the items we could not use

I agree that compulsive shoppers are good for charity shops - the amount of stuff that comes into the shop where I work still tagged is incredible. And not just fast fashion stuff either.

But the stuff which sells best is the vintage stuff which has stood the test of time. VERY popular are the little china teasets or 1970s coffee pots and cups. I think a lot of people have realised that they don't want a home which is just like everyone else's and furnished from Ikea and the other big retailers, they want something a bit more individual.

Yanbu. We've reached peak stuff .

Our second hand and charity shops are almost as nice as the high street these days.

I even borrowed magazines from the library the other week. I do buy bits from primark but make them last.

The dcs are getting activity vouchers for Xmas. I'm not buying more stuff and they know it.

I agree and it's not a case of well "just don't buy it then" that's not the point, that's not going to solve it, stop it or change it.
I live in the developing world and in a rural area so slightly less rich than the big cities. You can see a big difference in the level of consumerism, even inthe big cities, although they are sadly getting more westernised. People will only throw things out when they're not their very last legs. Children don't have mountains of toys and supermarkets are small and limited. Things are expensive as well because there's very little Chinese plastic tat. I notice almost everything in the UK is cheap and Chinese. That in itself is another issue with child labour or exploitation. It is a big problem. It requires a complete overhaul of buying habits and culture. Much harder to achieve and it cannot be achieved by some people just not buying things and turning a blind eye.

I mentioned on another thread how my child at almost 7, still plays with lots of his toys bought for him at 2/3 years old. Everyone seemed horrified. To me I wouldn't buy a gift for a child if I thought it would be outgrown within a year. I expect most toys to be bought, used for both children, then passed on still useable.

I agree with you, but I still do it to some extent, it's so easy to get sucked in. I'm a collector, but I try to buy quality things that are more likely to go up in value. I buy lots second hand. We only have a small house so I can't go too mad but we do have quite a lot of nice things. I think people should only buy things they love.

I hardly throw anything away - I use about 1 black bin bag a month. When I don't want something anymore I give it away, usually to charity shops or friends.

Helped by hating shopping, I wear clothes until they practically fall apart. What else would you do?

also, the 'can't buy anything useful' season was just December a couple of years back. Last week, end Sept, I see that the halloween and crap-mas rubbish is there already. So if I do actually need anything useful, it is going to be almost impossible. I try to avoid online shopping for the obvious reasons.

time to stay out of the shops until January except for food. Not hard as there isn't really much else I need - but not good for those with kids who grow and so need replacement clothes.

Yanbu - I avoid going into the pound shops now unless I want something specific ...it so easy to pick things up -only a £1 - that you didn't know you needed until you saw it...
As to clothes -some primark things are ok (jeans for DCs) other things are not worth buying (leggings for DCs -go to butter rag after one wash) but you can usually tell before you buy it...
Thinking of leggings - I remember watching a mother interviewed about child poverty - her child was classed as living in poverty. The flat was all new stuff etc - nothing looked well used or second hand or old fashioned. So someone with limited financial resources must have felt pressurised by our consumer society to maintain a certain appearance. Which I think sums up our current mentality and culture.
However the reason I thought of her was she was talking about how expensive school uniform was - her DD wore leggings, put holes in them after one wear and she was buying a couple of new pairs a week. Why would you do that - why not put your child into something more hard wearing? Or mend the holes?
(I used to mend school tights as my DC used to put the knees in first wear - not cos I couldn't afford more but because of the waste)

And also school uniform is cheap - would she have been replacing them so readily if they were costing her £10 or £15 pair rather than a couple of quid...

I do rotate things, especially soft furnishings like cushion covers and throws. But for us space is an issue, we don't have much storage space. If something isn't part of my current wardrobe and I'm not likely to wear it within a year or two, I send it to a charity shop. Also my shape and style changes over the years. I find even good quality knitwear starts to look worn/faded/ bobbly after a few years. The exceptions are coats, boots and classic dresses.

Can't imagine buying new Xmas decorations yearly though, we've had ours for 15years!

I think it was William Morris who said something about not having anything in your homes unless you knew it was useful or believed it to be beautiful.

Replacement clothes are expensive - but when children grow quickly there's often an opportunity for great second hand bargains or handmedowns. We have lots of things in the loft which my eldest has grown out of, and which will do his brother in a couple of years. I also picked up a good quality waterproof jacket in the charity shop for £5 which was barely worn and will do my daughter this winter at school and if it's not too trashed, will go back to Oxfam in the spring as her brother will refuse to wear it as it's bright pink.

For Christmas I'm going to make a concerted effort to buy either fair trade items or "experiences" instead of stuff. My parents have done this for my kids over the last couple years and it works very well - last year they got vouchers for a Go Ape type place and loved it.

YANBU at all. The whole 'stuff' thing makes me really anxious.

YANBU at all. I can't bear the constant consumerism. I work close to a town centre and daily colleagues come in from lunch to show their new clothes. There is no way they can wear all them clothes. I do shop for clothes but once or twice a year. There is no need to shop shop shop all the time.

I think as well that "shopping" used to be something you did when you needed something new or had to buy food for the family. It now seems that shopping is a hobby, something people do when they have no idea what else to do and that's why they end up buying all this "stuff".

I will just say I don't find the supermarket clothing of a quality that is disposable.

My little girl has been given lots of hand me downs from 2 friends and lots of it is from various supermarkets and is still in fantastic condition.

I guess there is an element, especially with childrens clothes, that people can't afford to spend £30 on a hard wearing item which won't fit in 12 months time so the £5 version which will last as long as it fits works.

I have friends and relatives who will go shopping every weekend. I go when I feel it necessary!

Do people really buy new Christmas decorations every year?

Yes.

I've watched a lot of the YouTube 'shopping haul' videos. Lots of young girls with huge primark bags, going through all the stuff they've bought. One of them bought a skirt that was too big for her, but it was a bargain as it was in the sale - but how can it be a bargain if she can't wear it?! Very worrying.

The only thing duller than shopping is seeing what someone else bought. People make videos about it? Saddo central!

It is a massive thing! Homeware hauls too!! The more bags the prouder they are!

I totally agree OP. I gave up buying things new a year ago and I now have a list of things DH and I need using a one in, one out philosophy wherever possible. We pop into the local charity shops when needed, looking for good quality items off the list, and also scour ebay regularly.

There's been the odd thing I've needed to buy new as a necessity, but otherwise have been just fine living off the spoils of society. Best bargain so far was a nearly new £20 Barbour jacket!

I've found birthdays and Christmas the worst though- people actively want to buy you tat, it's unbelievable. We're doing homemade stuff this year- fingers crossed the family appreciate it (and get the bloody hint)