To absolutely hate living in Surrey

[Bestofthebest]

I guess I have been here too long. Am 4 weeks away from escape to a very different part of the British Isles. All anyone seems to do here is go on about their sodding house price, how important their job is, the same one that has them getting the 0605 train like lemmings everyday. Socially people I habe found unfriendly and insular. It is practically a crime to be anything other than a Tory, but you can't show any interest in politics. The only acceptable subjects of conversation are how great you are, your job, Southern Rail and rugby. I hate it so very much I just hope there is a different world out there.

Not really Cat.

I was just joking, tongue in cheek. Op was saying that no one talked about anything other than house prices, and then she proceeded to talk about house prices.
I was just saying that I can talk, or better still I am able to listen to others. About most subjects. From trivial to very serious. There's not many subjects I don't enjoy talking about.

How is that obnoxious?

And the poster they said it was stifling and it was much better in West London? That was a genuine question to that poster. I don't find it stifling. But, I was wondering where she meant in west London? What is good there that I don't have here?

And isn't west London more expensive? So most of us might not be able to afford to move there?

I quite like West London as well, but where I live we have lots of different ethnicities and nationalities and lots of different food types. I get all of that here, where I live as well, so I was just interested in what extras west London had to offer.

I felt like this when I lived in South Bucks. Moved to Hants/Surrey borders (work one side, live the other) and it's far better, although I do get still glimpses of this world, generally on the Surrey side of the boundary.

Bitter?
Christ, I'm not bitter. Well actually I am about something completely different, that happened, to me.
But but about this!!

Come over to the Surrey /Sutton borders OP....

I'd like you to say why you live in Surrey OP.
Born and bred- or moved with your partner for work?

IME very few people live in the expensive SE out of choice unless they are born and bred there; we're here for the work. There are some types of work that you can do across the UK but the fact is there are more job opps in the south. Moving north is a one-way street re. house prices. We often dreamed of moving north but realised we'd never be able to move south again as property prices wouldn't keep pace.

Most of my neighbours are not 'southerners' but from all over the UK and are here for work. I live in a village where complete strangers say 'good morning' when we pass in the street.

We all talk of relocating when we retire, but once you have adult DCs who find their own work in the SE, the whole thing gets more complicated.

I've lived in Surrey my entire life, so lovely to know I'm a shallow, money obsessed, tory voting, insular bore. Thanks for enlightening me! Where's your home town/county? How would you feel about a post slagging you all off? It's ridiculous to tar an entire county based on the small bit you happen to live in.

There are people like you describe everywhere (yes - even the North!) - but you don't have to socialise with them. I've never talked about house prices for a sustained period, nor Southern Trains (mainly because we're served by SouthWest Trains ) but have had some hum-dingers of political discussions. I feel I have the best of both, as I can go 40 mins and be in London, or 40 mins (or less) the other way and be in open countryside. It's not perfect (traffic is bloody awful for a start) but where is?
I'm sorry Surrey wasn't for you and I wish you luck in your next place. But a lot of us really are not like you describe at all! Stop making such sweeping assumptions based on small samples.

oblomov

I think you've got the wrong end of the stick. I was describing where I live in Surrey - I have no idea where you live so can't comment on that. I'm not going to say which town, but one look at the demographic data and it's obvious the numbers of non-white people living in my town is very low, making it less diverse. Obviously.

I work with vulnerable families and one of the biggest problems for them is lack of activities for families, poor links to London, high cost of local public transport and very poor services.

And it's Ealing - we could afford to move there. It's very similar to where we used to live in SE London. Off to work now.

It is also partly about house prices as it costs a fraction where I am moving to compared to here. It has been a really difficult and disconcerting experience living somewhere like this

If you have the option to move and be gainfully employed, just do it!

But I think you will find there are downsides to wherever you live. When I go back north I am gobsmacked at the size of the people who seem to live on Greggs pasties, (Planet Obesity) and the perma tanned , doughnut bunned, young lasses carrying huge handbags. There are stereotypes everywhere OP but there are other people as well!

Annadale..i agree re winchester. Loved visiting the towns for several years so when i had the chance to live there jumped at it. Was a huge letdown and then they started charging to visit the catherdral, shops started closing and the xmas market so packed you couldnt move let alone shop. Glad to leave. The countryside around is still very pretty but im so glad we left to move to surrey! Havent been back for 10 years (whenever they started charging at the catheral) now..

Redhill.
Horley.
Shit holes.
Say no more.

I lived in Kingston for quite a while. Bloody loved it. Very nostalgic when I go back to visit. Happy days.

(Wouldn't move back though-too claustrophobic. And house prices ridiculous )

Stereotypical, bigoted comments much. There are pleasant and unpleasant places everywhere. It's what you make it. I've lived in Surrey and there are leafy Surrey areas, but there are down to earth areas too. I've lived on the border of Surrey and Hampshire- Hartley Witney anyone. Now in Sussex by the coast. Probably a more cosmopolitan area. As long as there are pleasant people around and somewhere to live, who cares.

Whoopiedoo That's so funny!

Some years ago, travellers moved onto a grass verge in a very well-to-do area a few miles away. As soon as they'd gone, several of the village scurried out with their spades to dig a trench and mound, stopping them ever doing it again.

They also made a real pigs ear of that verge! It still looks awful. All for a once-in-a-blue-moon possibility that travellers might stop by again.

I live in south west Surrey and it's a fantastic place to live. Beautiful countryside on our doorstep, picturesque river 5 minutes away, pretty town up the road, bigger town 3/4 miles away, 35 miles/45mins on train from central London, friendly people. I feel exceptionally lucky to live here.

Yes it's overwhelmingly tory, unfortunately, but that doesn't mean that everyone is. I've got no interest in the chelsea-tractor-driving, swishy haired yummy mummy brigade, and have nothing to do with them. Before moving here I lived in London for 15 years, and that's full of swishy haired snobs and people obsessed with the price of their property! There are plenty of decent, down to earth people round here if you take the time to get to know people. Even the old tory stalwarts of the WI are nice enough when you're chatting to them on a dog walk. I'm much more interested in nature than I am in people, though, I must admit.

We live in the more downmarket end/village of a pretty affluent little town, and where we are is a lot more mixed, with pockets of deprivation. It makes me laugh when idiots say 'oh everyone in Surrey must be rich and posh'. Complete bollocks.

I used to live in Hertfordshire and it was the same. Tbh I think all the home counties are as you describe OP. or at least huge parts of them. It's commuting to London that makes people judgemental and insular. I live well away now and couldn't be happier.

Obviously there are many people who have a very different view of the place and the people. I have kind of got used to being surrounded by people who are very different and think very different to myself but still I find it sad somehow. I went to secondary school here, hated it, and only ended up back here partly for family reasons and partly because I just couldnt get a reasonable paid job in the places I wanted to live. I do think there is something about this part of the world whether you call it Croydon commuter belt/Surrey/Home Counties/SE England that does not like examining itself, and cannot take any criticism. I am well aware there are good and bad people everywhere and it may be that I will never be happy anywhere but I feel I need to try. I am sorry to those I may have offended but it has really affected me living like this and I wanted to get it out.

aww i quite like Redhill, irs got the only MandS cafe in the world that isnt heaving and yiu can do a bit of shopping in peace cos noone else wants to go there. Like everywhere, there are the stereotypes but there is alsonlits more going on if you take your head out of your own arse. Imoved out of London to similar area to OP to have children and met some.incredibly supportive frindly people that are still friends today (many of them born and bred in Croydon! shock horror) My children go mountain biking, hiking, sailing, windsurfing etc, all on our doorstep. Coast is an easy journey away, M25 on your doorstep for getting up North to visit relatives, lovely country side, easy access to ondon for nights out and to be able to earn enough money to gibe my family a nice life. Ok ive met some tossers of course, and most of the old.people are relentlessly Tory (or UKIP, even worse) but the younger peiple are much more diverse (Siddiq Khans family live near me).

TBH in 20 years of working in central London by far, far the majority of absolute tossers I have met have been extreme sexist/racist types from Kent and Essex or sexist Rugby bores from Yorkshire etc.

oh well, i like it here, generally.

"Moral of the story - people are the same everywhere; how you perceive them is down to you!"

Nice story, but it's just a story. People are not the same everywhere. OP is entitled to her opinion, it's obviously touched a nerve with some of you.

LOL you needed to get out more. You live near Croyden but complain of Tory voting, house price obsessed, rugby yattering & job boasting bores?! Your tar brush is huge, Surrey is a big county, and your description really doesn't ring true at all.

OP - I live in Croydon, which is Surrey - ergo YABU - pretty much polar opposite to what you describe

Just realised the most insulting thing someone has ever said to me was from a Londoner who came from Surrey but moved to London, an horrendously narrow-minded snob who asked me "Wouldn't your husband prefer to have a proper job, you know in an office?" He's a carpenter and no he wouldn't prefer to join the daily commute in to London for a soul destroying job behind a desk. And as for having a 'proper job' I think that fact he can fit your bespoke kitchen, build your staircase, lay your flooring etc means he has a 'proper "skilled" job'. Btw her husband was a sales executive who earn shed loads of money selling advertising space so not exactly a surgeon himself!

(sent in a hurry excuse typos :) )

Of course the OP is entitled to her opinion, but others are equally entitled to point out that while she's entitled to her opinion, it's horseshit not an accurate picture of the county 😁

"It has been a really difficult and disconcerting experience living somewhere like this."

Tell us more. I live in a similar place though not Surrey. It's rich, bland pretentious yet rough around the ages, with a fair degree of antisocial behaviour. It's difficult to move away as one feels stuck in a bubble. Good on you for moving.

I live in the northern most point of North East Surrey as you call it. The rugby club is nearby and I love listening to them play each night. Southern Rail is shite and it fucks up our lives daily so yes it would be a topic of conversation. Generally people talk about things that impact them. House prices are ridiculous and traffic is bad. But I love living here. I like the people, they are always friendly and nice. There are some huge houses but also lots of not very big ones. I get to walk for miles on the commons and in woodland and get a train (on a good day ) to London. My kids have London on their doorstep and as a foreigner I know how lucky they are to have that.

Sounds to me like you just assiociate with the wrong crowd for you.

I hated living in Essex I really didn't make any friends at all. Of course I don't go around insulting everyone who lives there. I just left.